There's nothing worse than being stuck at home or in the office on a hot summer day when everybody else is at the beach. That's the thinking behind Clubhouse, a new-wave cafe tucked in beneath the Surf Life Saving Association national headquarters in Rosebery. Yes, Rosebery. Not a lot of surf in Rosebery.

"Not everybody can live by the sea,'' says general manager Julian Damjano, formerly of Hugos and the Ivy Pool Bar. "So we're bringing the beach to the people."

Clubhouse cheekily claims to have been established in 1907 at the same time as the SLSA itself, but we'll overlook that furphy because we're so pathetically grateful for anything that makes us think we're at the beach.

Like open-air timber decking, wooden picnic tables and people in shorts and sunnies drinking beer; like posters of bathing-capped, stripey-suited swimmers, and signs that read "Ladies On Beach Must Wear Bloomers".

Like a sunny beach house menu of boards and bites, sandwiches and salads, fish and chips and cheese burgers. Like a line-up of pale ales and ciders on tap, and cocktails built on rum, tequila, coconut, lemongrass, lime, passionfruit and pineapple.

Coffee is their own six-bean blend out of Caffe Di Stefano, strong enough to wake you up without sending you over the edge; and breakfasts range from prosciutto-and-brie croissants ($7) to cinnamon tortillas with grilled bananas, ice-cream, walnuts and maple syrup ($12). But if this is meant to be about life-saving, then where's the all-day breakfast? Give us this day our daily egg-and-bacon roll please, and not just between the flags of 8am and 11.30am.

Mind you, the non-egg-and-bacon lunches are attractive in their own right. Chef Rafael Tonon from Barrio Chino has swapped tostadas for fresh little surfboard-shaped pizzette topped with nice things like pork belly, smoked salmon or tomato and mozzarella. The beetroot pizzetta ($10) is super-pretty, thin, crisp, free-range and riched-up with goat curd and braised onions. Salads are composed rather than tossed; the grilled asparagus strewn with melting moments of buffalo mozzarella and warm cherry tomato vinaigrette ($18). A ''sandwich'' of chicken and avocado ($14) comes in a too-heavy roll, making it easier to just pick at the chicken and avocado like a seagull instead.

Let's be honest, Clubhouse may not actually save your life - but it will make you feel better about being stranded on dry land this summer.

Do … support Surf Life Saving Australia

Don't … go in your wetsuit

Dish … Beetroot pizzetta, $10

Vibe … Beachside dining without the beach