Making News: Underemployed Wayne Carey could work at the local Tesla factory
All the news that's fit to mint.
All the news that's fit to mint.
What's happening in (The) Oz:
💊 Wayne Carey now has more time to organise his pain meds
🍎 You'll find audacity in aisle 5 at the new Harris Farm
🪫 Elon is coming to Australia?
💸 Pandemic pay may sleep on the government's futon a little longer
🎢 The share market will give you motion sickness
🔪 King Charles is trimming the fat
🚉 Don't worry if you forget your Opal card next week
👏🏼 Phoebe Burgess gets some things off her chest
Good morning!
We're still coming to terms with the death of French film maker Jean-Luc Godard.
The man who broke the mould of how stories should be told in the 1950s and beyond.
Speaking of stories...
Wayne Carey, the former AFL football star who was kicked out and banned from Crown in Perth a few weeks ago when a bag of white powder in a zip-lock bag fell out of his pocket in a gaming room, has lost one of his media jobs.
Triple M have announced Carey won't be returning to the airwaves or have his contract renewed...
"On behalf of Triple M we would like to thank Wayne for his services to our football commentary team, and we wish him the best for the future,” Dave Cameron, the chief content officer for Southern Cross Austereo - the company that owns Triple M - said.
Carey will not appear on Triple M this weekend, nor in the lead-up to the AFL grand final next weekend.
However, he has other jobs. But those - his TV commentary role with Seven, and his columnist duties with The Age newspaper - are still TBC.
Carey is no stranger to controversy (or second chances), learn more about those here.
Speaking of rollercoasters
Ever accidentally dropped a heap of coins down a storm drain while fishing for a crisp $5 note in your bag?
That's what happened to the Australian stock market on Wednesday when $63 billion was wiped out in 10 minutes.
tl;dr - it's all America's fault.
The ASX, like most markets around the world, follows the lead of the US like a younger sibling. Essentially they're the Marcia, we're the Jan. So when the US announced it had recorded a 0.1% rise in inflation to 8.3%, investors everywhere were, at least, expecting a bloodbath.
Get your motor running
Chair of Tesla and the Technology Council of Australia, Robyn Denholm, has dropped a major hint that Elon Musk could open a factory in Australia.
Addressing the National Press Club on Wednesday, she said there were huge savings for the company if it produced the cars locally, and referenced a “rapid” ramp-up in its manufacturing.
She defended Tesla's focus on China and said there are plans to expand further there, but also said reaching a goal of making 20 million cars a year by 2030 will "require manufacturing capabilities on every continent".
Never go shopping hungry
Or, in the case of the new Harris Farm, with assets you can pawn. Because you will attempt to sell your soul if it could be redeemed at the in-house Messina bar (I tried, cash only unfortunately).
Harris Farm is the Australian version of Whole Foods in NSW.
It's opened a lavish new "emporium" in Lane Cove that hosts a fishmonger, Messina parlour, build-a-cookie-pie station and 500 cheese varieties from around the world.
Instead of traditional aisles, the layout features categorised sections with different names such as: Fairyland, Bakers Cottage, Dessert Cove, Flower Patch, The Juicery, Wholesome Harvest and The Cook and Baker and Proper Meat.
Dare you to wear your house clothes and Uggs here.
Pandemic pay here to stay?
Mandatory iso for Covid is still a thing (five days if you've got no symptoms) and masks are no longer required on planes but the payment for those off work due to the spicy cough will remain.
The $540 payments were due to dry up at the end of September but the Prime Minister and national cabinet agreed to extend them until it meets again in a fortnight, where iso rules may be updated again.
"My own view is that while governments place imposed restrictions, then governments therefore have responsibility as a result of those decisions," Anthony Albanese said.
KC III to drop some kgs
In a wild bit of trivia, the Queen employed about 491 staff and now the new Monarch is poised to move into her "household" he may have to downsize on the HR front.
About 100 of Charles' long serving employees have received notice they may be getting the sack (albeit with a generous golden handshake).
That's despite the King employing the full-time equivalent of 101 staff, according to Clarence House’s annual review published earlier this year
There are 31 in the private secretaries’ office, including private and assistant private secretaries, research, administrative and equerry staff. Give or take a few butlers and some "dressers" too.
Meanwhile the Queen's body is now laying in state in London. Where she will stay for the next four days. It's expected close to 1 million people will endure queues of about 30km and line up for about seven hours to say their goodbyes.
We interrupt this program...
For more news about train strikes in Sydney.
The unions, who have been arguing with the NSW government like a Real Housewife, will turn off Opal machines next week as the industrial action for better pay and conditions ramps up another notch. Again.
MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT
— Unions NSW (@unionsnsw) September 14, 2022
All opal machines at train stations in Sydney and NSW will be turned off indefinitely, from Wednesday next week.
If there is no way to tap on or off, you cannot be fined. Please remain vigilant as the NSW Premier may try various tactics to turn machines on.
Phoebe's painful plot twist
Phoebe Burgess has spoken about her decision to have a breast reduction.
The podcaster explained why she down sized on the latest episode of Vogue's Under The Gloss and talked about her “volatile” lifelong relationship with her boobs.
“I have had a very private, but very up and down relationship with my boobs. We’re volatile. If we were in an actual relationship I would have dumped them years ago,” Burgess posted to Instagram, alongside images of herself post-surgery.
"If you’re thinking uhh what boobs Phoebe? I had become the master of concealing them."
Listen to her getting her chest off her chest here.
Meghan Markle’s favourite face gym is opening in Australia, Greta Thunberg publishes Andrew Tate’s contact details
All the news that's fit to mint.
Emily Ratajkowski joins the competitive world of online dating, Nick Kyrgios quits at the last minute
All the news that's fit to mint.