Oh Matilda mystery solved: Stan Grant and Peter FitzSimons just don’t get along
Stan Grant and Peter FitzSimons no longer speak and it came to a head over Grant’s chapter for The Australian’s summer novel.
It is the spectacular society stoush that proves, once and for all, that truth is stranger than fiction.
Former friends and fellow authors Stan Grant and Peter FitzSimons are no longer on speaking terms — and it came to a head over a chapter Grant wrote for a serialised murder mystery novel published by The Australian last week.
Penned chapter by chapter by some of the nation’s best and most beloved authors, Oh Matilda: Who Bloody Killed Her? has offered readers a tongue-in-cheek take on the traditional whodunit over the summer.
But in an unexpected real-life plot twist, Grant’s contribution last Wednesday reignited a bitter, deep-seated rift between the ABC journalist and his one-time pal, Nine newspaper columnist and former Wallaby FitzSimons.
The pair publicly fell out over a dispute about James Cook’s legacy while FitzSimons was spruiking his latest historical tome — a biography on the explorer — nine months ago, trading barbs in the pages of his newspaper.
However, the details contained in Grant’s chapter suggest their feud was more deeply rooted than anyone expected — and this time ended in a terse text message exchange between the two media identities and the complete collapse of their relationship.
A proud Wiradjuri man and the ABC’s international affairs analyst, Grant said he had hoped to use the opportunity to contribute to the “progressive novel” to flex his fiction and comedy muscles while provoking thought about what it meant to be Aboriginal and the state of Indigenous relations in Australia.
“I wanted to be a bit silly and have a crack about race, political correctness, lefty-lovey society while revealing the murderer,” Grant said.
Summer Novel
Chapter 1
An actress. An island. A gonzo murder mystery. The Australian’s progressive summer novel Oh Matilda: Who Bloody Killed Her? starts here.
Chapter 2
Acclaimed author and journalist Gideon Haigh picks up our summer novel Oh Matilda: Who Bloody Killed Her? Our hero, McCredden, is feeling a little strange.
Chapter 3
He’s Australia’s most popular author, and now Trent Dalton joins our biggest summer novel: Oh Matilda, Who Bloody Killed Her? Chapter Three is taking things in an alarmingly comic direction.
Chapter 4
Our ‘hero’ John McCredden has a phenomenal memory. An award-winning crime writer pens the next piece of the summer’s hottest novel — Oh Matilda: Who Bloody Killed Her?
Chapter 5
Maya needs a drink. McCredden needs to get a grip. Historical fiction author Emma Harcourt is about to take our progressive novel in a dark new direction.
Chapter 6
Fiona Harari is a Weekend Australian Magazine feature writer and a renowned author — and she’s zeroing in on our story’s most mysterious character.
Chapter 7
What do we really know about doomed starlet Matilda Meadows? About as much as we know about her demise. Marlee Silva takes up the story.
Chapter 8
What would a real-life homicide cop make of all this? We’re about to find out, as retired Detective Inspector Gary Jubelin (now an author and journalist) takes up the story
Chapter 9
Hang on, someone else has been murdered. Not on the island. Back in the memory of one of our characters. The Australian’s chief cricket writer Peter Lalor takes up the story.
Chapter 10
Heard the one about the world-famous actress and the X-rated dinner party? Greg Bearup is digging into the seamy history of Australia’s A-list with his scandalous chapter.
Chapter 11
What every down-and-dirty reality show needs is some intruders to upset the ecosystem. Journalist Joe Hildebrand is taking over the story – and the island.
Chapter 12
Ambitious newshound Becky Cummerbund is chasing the story of what happened to ingenue Matilda Meadows for Celebrity Central, and she’s got the whiff of blood. Or is it fear? Shankari Chandran takes the lead in Chapter 12 of our progressive novel
Chapter 13
Is that cigar smoke wafting through the air, or is it the whiff of terror? Author Gail Bell takes up our story
Chapter 14
Turns out Matilda Meadows nearly died once before — and lived to tell the tale. William McInnes takes up our story
Chapter 15
What would James Bond do? We’re about to find out as journalist Charles Wooley takes up our novel’s gripping summer story.
Chapter 16
Things are changing, and not in a way John McCredden likes. Author Carly Findlay takes up the story
Chapter 17
Journalist and author Stan Grant knows what lies beneath the polite smiles of mysterious beauty Matilda Meadows.
Chapter 18
Cringes? McCredden’s had a few. Like the time he disgraced himself in front of Ian Thorpe. But this is next level.
Chapter 19
Pesky paparazzi Becky Cummerbund and her loyal cameraman Henry are becoming unbearable.
Chapter 20
What could go wrong when an ultra-ambitious actress meets the movie mogul and sexual predator?
Chapter 21
The scramble is on – to get off this terrifying island. But can two young creatives get away before the killer gets them?
Chapter 22
What’s with all the cameras? Is this ... a reality show? Siobhan McKenna takes up our story in Chapter 22.
Chapter 23
And then there were five people left alive on the island: Mother, Maya, McCredden, De Kock and Bradley. Who’s next?
Chapter 24
The sexual energy cannot be contained when these two movie stars meet — and Nikki Gemmell’s here to capture every passionate moment.
Oh Matilda: What’s going on?
Confused? We got you. Here’s a chapter-by-chapter cheat sheet for smash-hit summer novel Oh Matilda: Who Bloody Killed Her?
Chapter 25: Tom Keneally
Australia’s best-loved writer, Tom Keneally, makes it look easy with a masterful denouement of our progressive summer novel. Turns out Maya got away with murder. Or did she?
FitzSimons, Kidman: book skewers big names
Fitzy vs. Stan, Gideon vs. Nicole, William McInnes vs. Singo — the art of the literary roast is alive and well. Now it’s your turn.
The people’s ending
Scores of readers entered our competition to write an alternative final chapter to our progressive summer novel — and the winner is leaving nothing to chance.
Oh Matilda: Readers twist the knife
We asked readers to come up with a final chapter of our thrilling summer novel, to be judged by Tom Keneally. The result? Moral squalor and lots of laughs.
For FitzSimons, many of the jokes fell far too close to home — largely because much of the chapter centred around the real-life, annual Australia Day bash he hosts along with his Network Ten presenter wife, Lisa Wilkinson, at their palatial house on Sydney’s affluent north shore, along with the “woke lefty” culture that allegedly pervades it.
The chapter also took another swipe at the columnist over his Cook book. “What a woke lefty love-in that was: journos, actors, writers, couple of ex-Wallabies, a few washed-up politicians, even a couple of Liberals (small l, of course) and a former managing director of the ABC for good measure,” a character in Grant’s chapter notes.
“Everyone there voted yes for same-sex marriage — the year before last, they’d all tearily applauded their first gay married couple guests — they hated the Catholic Church and had cried when Kevin Rudd said sorry.
“(FitzSimons and Wilkinson) adored Indigenous culture. There were dot paintings on the wall, a photo with their arms around Cathy Freeman at Sydney Olympic Stadium and a framed copy of Paul Keating’s Redfern Statement signed by the last great Australian prime minister himself.
“Things did get a bit weird though when Fitzy excitedly gave her a copy of his latest book, a biography of Captain Cook.
“Apparently Cookie was actually not a bad bloke once you got past his order to open fire on the blacks at Botany Bay. Nobody’s perfect.”
Grant has maintained that the chapter was obvious satire and clearly fictional, telling friends it was a “gentle piss-take” and that he mocked himself in it as much as anyone else.
When asked about FitzSimons’s reaction to the piece on Monday, the 57-year-old said he had greater concerns with which to contend.
“There are important things to worry about in the world,” Grant said.
“People who can’t laugh at themselves aren’t one of them.”
FitzSimons, meanwhile, told friends that he was genuinely wounded by the what he felt was an unfair and unprovoked attack, saying it did not feel like a gentle dig and that he was concerned that many of the details — such as him owning a framed copy of the Redfern Speech or a picture of himself with Freeman — were not true.
The bust up has become the talk of the society and media circles in which both men move, with many friends and colleagues feeling compelled to take sides.
FitzSimons and Wilkinson’s annual Australia Day party has, for years, been one of the most prestigious events on Sydney’s socialite calendar with a carefully curated lists of guests.
This year, it was cancelled because of COVID-19 and the couple instead had five close friends and family over for dinner.
Click here to read Stan Grant’s chapter or go to ohmatilda.com.au for the full story.
In any normal year, you might see Labor powerbroker Tanya Plibersek in the pool with her kids, ABC journalists Leigh Sales and Annabel Crabb chatting, or former 2UE radio host Mike Carlton rocking a new pair of cowboy boots.
Interviewers Michael Parkinson and Andrew Denton have also been guests over the years, as have former Wallabies captain John Eales, former treasurer Joe Hockey and former magazine maven Deborah Thomas.
It is understood Grant attended for a number of years.
“The house is crammed with books, and hundreds of vases of flowers; they have staff come in to take care of the cleaning up, and champagne corks pop all afternoon,” one former guest said. “You sit outside on the terrace overlooking the pool and harbour. Lisa will be there, looking superb in a flowing sundress and sun hat … everyone brings a plate, people coming and going all afternoon. It’s really lovely.
“It’s like one of those ‘end of year cartoons’ you see in the newspapers: every time you turn around, you bump into somebody more famous than the last person.
“It’s always been Chatham House (rules) — nobody takes photos or tweets or hashtags; it’s private hospitality, and I think what’s put Pete out is he invited Stan into his home, and three years later got sideswiped.”
Famously bombastic, FitzSimons’ political views set the tone for much of the day. Two years ago, the columnist, who chairs the Australian Republican Movement, brought the date of the soiree forward to January 25, started calling it an Independence Day party and issued guests with song sheets to “I am, You Are, We Are Australian”. “Fitz normally gives a speech, and he’ll often single out special guests,” one former guest said.
“There was a shout-out and applause for the ‘first gay married couple’, the ABC’s Josh Szeps (son of actor Henry Szeps OAM) and his American-born husband, Sean, who married in 2014, and returned to Australia with surrogate-born twins sometime later than that.”
Other guests remembered FitzSimons calling for a round of applause for Grant one year in recognition of his role as an Indigenous Australian in media.
“If you happen to have received a gong — plenty of people have gongs, OAM etc — you get a clap, too,” one party-goer said.
In their initial spat last April, Grant wrote an opinion piece, headlined Between the ship and the shore: The Captain James Cook I Know, in The Sydney Morning Herald, accusing FitzSimons of making Cook “the prototypical Aussie good bloke”. He added that FitzSimons’s description of the explorer as being far from “an enthusiastic imperialist” was “ludicrous” and questioned his understanding of Cook’s landing at Botany Bay.
FitzSimons defended his work, saying it had been meticulously researched by his team over the course of four years and he stood by the biography.
Asked on Monday about Grant’s take on his annual party, FitzSimons sounded dejected but said he wished the ABC presenter no ill will.
“I’ve moved on and wish Stan the best,” he said.
At least one person was not put out by their portrayal in Grant’s story: Wilkinson’s former Today show co-host Karl Stefanovic, who was described as being “in his budgie smugglers playing a tennis racket guitar gyrating towards the pool as Fitzy cranked up Skyhooks”.
“I wasn’t there (last year). But Stan always had a little crush on me,” Stefanovic said.
Join the story at ohmatilda.com.au or go straight to Caroline Overington’s hilarious Chapter 1 to start from the beginning.