Please slurp your noodles: Dos and don’ts of eating out in Asia

If you ever dine with locals in China, Japan or South Korea for business or pleasure, you’ll have the chance to connect in a relaxed setting. A few rules of etiquette, however, will make for a better experience and impress your hosts.

You wouldn’t want to appear greedy or hungry, would you? Both may be taken as a sign of poverty or lack of refinement. If invited to someone’s house, politely decline food the first time it’s offered. Not to worry, you’ll be given a second (and third) chance to eat.

Don’t be afraid to slurp those noodles when eating out with others in East Asia.Credit: iStock

In restaurants, especially in China, consideration and respect is shown by plucking fine morsels from communal dishes and placing them in your companions’ bowls. Again, you might make a polite protest. So will your fellow diners, but don’t take them at their word. Try again.

It’s also polite to refill other diners’ teacups, glasses and soy-sauce dishes before your own. This is especially true in Japan, where nobody ever pours their own drink. When someone offers to pour your drink, lift your glass up with one hand supporting it from below, then take a small sip before setting it down.

In Japan toasts are proposed at the start of meals; in China they’ll be ongoing. Whoever hosts should be first to offer a toast, and will probably order the food without consultation.

Meals can be convivial except in South Korea, where too much chatter shows lack of respect for the food and occasion. Anywhere, polite Australian conversational fillers about the weather or traffic will cause bemusement. Talk about the food, however, will be welcomed.

Credit: Illustration: Greg Straight

Brace yourself: few topics are off limits. The Chinese might quiz you about your age, religion, marital status, salary, rent or the cost of the clothes on your back. Awkward, but take it as a great opportunity to turn the tables and find out more about your hosts.

And so to the food. While chomping is universally considered uncouth, slurping soup or noodles can be a sign of appreciation in Asia. Such dishes are also “inhaled” to cool them as you eat. Only hungry peasants fill up on rice, so don’t ask for it if hosted. You’ll get a small bowl of rice towards the end of the meal in China. In Japan, rice is eaten between courses and never mixed with food.

A soup followed by fruit is a sign that a Chinese meal is concluding. The end is abrupt from our perspective, with diners dispersing almost immediately. The Japanese are more likely to move on to a bar. The host might slip away before the meal’s end to pay the bill at the cashier desk. Going Dutch is the norm in Japan but in China and South Korea the host pays, although this habit is eroding among the young.

Don’t insist on contributing. It will cause embarrassment on the assumption you’re spurning the hospitality. Better to host another meal in return. Enjoy!