Party pies may be Australia’s snack of choice. Utilitarian and delicious, they’re a staple for footy final festivities, children’s parties and impromptu kick-ons at your mate’s place. But not all party pies are created equal. They can come gluten-free or meat-free, no-frills or fancy, and with so many to choose from, it can be overwhelming.

“You’re looking for that feeling of, ‘I know it might be bad for me, but it’s so good I don’t care’.”

Callan Boys

To assist, Good Food has assembled a crack team of tasters to work their way through every party pie available in the freezer and refrigerated sections at Woolworths, Coles, Aldi and Costco. There’s Callan Boys, editor of the SMH Good Food Guide; head of Good Food, Sarah Norris; and me, Good Food reporter.

Boys, a self-professed party pie enthusiast, has strong opinions about what it takes to nail this Aussie speciality.

“You’re looking for that feeling of, ‘I know it might be bad for me, but it’s so good I don’t care’,” he says.

In ranking the pies, we considered the following:

• The structural integrity of the pastry
• The crust-to-filling ratio
• The flavour, texture and appearance of both pastry and filling
• The cost
• The smashability of the pie

Each pie was heated according to its package instructions and eaten both with and without tomato sauce.

Good Food’s pick of the party pies
(from worst to best)

11. Pie Society Meatless Party Pies
$9.50 for six pies

Delicious plant-based pies do exist, but these aren’t it. One bite into the thin pastry reveals slivers of glutenous faux meat, a slimy-smooth brown mass suspended in starchy and strange-tasting gloops of gravy. It’s an immediate “no” from the entire team.

Available at select Coles and Woolworths supermarkets.

10. Woolworths Party Pack 24 Pack
$12 for 30 pies

The filling of this party pie is what I imagine gravy tastes and feels like after being watered down, then left to cool and congeal for a few hours – bland and unpleasant. But, notes Boys, the pastry (while pale) does hold its shape.

Available at Woolworths supermarkets.

9. Coles I’m Free From Gluten Mini Party Pack
$11.20 for 12 pies

It’s a sad day for those with dietary restrictions, Norris says. These party pies are not only some of the most expensive on the list, but they also have the chalkiest, most objectionable pastry. The meat doesn’t help matters, with a granular texture and strong earthy flavour.

Available at select Coles supermarkets.

8. Coles Frozen Party Pies
$6.80 for 24 pies

Are the Coles home-brand party pies good? Not really. Are they better than Woolies’ party pies? The answer is a resounding yes. These are thin and lacking in flavour, but they have a slight edge thanks to their comparatively golden crust. Plus, they’re cheap.

Available at Coles supermarkets.

7. Elmsbury (Aldi) Party Pies
$6.49 for 24 pies

This is a low-cost party pie that looks surprisingly appetising once cooked. The shell is golden and flaky, forming a strong base for a bland but otherwise inoffensive filling. Nothing a generous squeeze of tomato sauce can’t fix.

Available at Aldi supermarkets.

6. Simmone Logue Cocktail Chicken and Leek Pies
$16.50 for 12 pies

Sydney local Simmone Logue has been selling ready-to-eat meals since the ’90s. It’s a pretty pastry, with a moreish, flaky shell let down by a slightly sour, poorly seasoned filling. But tomato sauce can’t help you here, according to Boys, who considers the combination of chicken pie and tomato sauce “obscene”.

Available at select Coles, Woolworths and Harris Farm supermarkets.

5. Liz & Betty Finest Mini Pies Chicken Leek Thyme; Wagyu Beef & Red Wine; and Lamb and Rosemary
$10 for 10 mini pies

These puffy pies are tiny, a feature that feels more appropriate for cocktail party canapes than a footy final gathering. The fillings are flavoursome (the lamb being the clear standout), but the ratio is off. As Boys puts it, “they’re just so small that you’re getting too much pastry and not enough filling”.

Available at select Woolworths supermarkets.

4. Herbert Adams Premium Gourmet King Island Beef Party Pies
$9.50 for 12 pies

The shell of this pie has crinkled edges, which is how you know it’s fancy. That thick buttery crust encases a strong, meaty filling. A solid choice, so long as the strange, sinewy texture of the beef doesn’t bother you.

Available at select Coles and Woolworths supermarkets.

3. Four’N Twenty Party Pies Frozen
$7 for 12 pies

This pie encapsulates the flavour of Australia. With its punchy gravy and tender, salted crust, it is the standard we have each come to expect from a good meat pie. But don’t dive in just yet – this pie holds a lot of heat, and its sloppy filling is the most likely to burn your mouth and hands.

Available at select Coles and Woolworths supermarkets (and in bulk at Costco).

RUNNER-UP

Simmone Logue Angus Beef & Vegetable Cocktail Pies
$16.50 for 12 pies

This is a gourmet party pie that smells (and tastes) as good as it looks. It emerges with a tender, flaky crust and a comforting filling, reminiscent of the tastiest home-made casserole. Even after sampling so many pies, these are happily and quickly devoured. Highly smashable.

Available at select Coles, Woolworths and Harris Farm supermarkets.

WINNER

Patties Frozen Party Classic Beef Pies
$9.50 for 12

Take everything you love about the Four’N Twenty pies, then dial it up a notch. That’s Patties. These savoury flavour bombs boast a hearty, tender filling and a golden, supple shell that won’t fall apart. “I’d happily keep them in my freezer if I could trust myself not to eat them all,” Boys says.

Available at select Coles and Woolworths supermarkets (and in bulk at Costco).