Single in Sydney: The REAL five reasons you’re still single
SARAH meets a dating guru, who offers an insight into why she believes she - as well as Sydney’s other single woman - remain unattached.
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JOURNALIST Sarah Swain has been single (but dating) for longer than she cares to remember.
That’s because it’s tough out there, as any single will tell you, so to bring hope to others across the city, she’s sharing her no-holds-barred adventures on the Sydney single scene every Friday.
Week 37 I discover why I’m REALLY single
It’s not because we’re too fat, like cats or sit at home in our pyjamas on a Friday night eating Dairy Milk (though on second thoughts, that could perhaps be a factor).
No, fellow single girls, there’s a specific handful of reasons we’ve still not found our soulmate, according to a Sydney relationship guru.
Sarah Davis, 33, is a wellness and relationship coach based in Sydney’s Eastern Suburbs who helps single women find love.
She reckons she’s helped around 200 ladies meet a man, and has even had some engagements.
She runs workshops (at an affordable $49) and offers private sessions (she’s not keen to reveal how much they cost).
Sometimes, she even works from a bar, hosts workshops and even helps women chat up guys though her Meet Up group.
Kind of like when Carrie ran a dating class in a bar in an episode of Sex and the City.
And just like Ms Bradshaw, Davis, who comes from a family of therapists but used to work in marketing before launching her copany a couple of years ago, pulled together a special private dating class for my friends and I, as well as some of her clients, at bar and restaurant Ananas, in the Rocks.
The session, held in one of the plush velvet-curtained rooms, saw a dozen of us single girls listen intently, as Davis spilled her secrets over wine and cheese.
And while not all the women agreed with everything she said (some had issues with her tips such as letting men exercise their traditional roles by doing simple things like opening doors - I say that’s the least of my worries) there were five things that really got me thinking.
Because Davis reckons, through her own experiences and knowledge (she’s divorced but now is happily coupled-up), as well as talking to the women she’s worked with, she’s created a fundamental list of reasons women are single.
And here there are.
Top Five Reasons Women are Single, by Sarah Davis
1 Not enough Space
We need to create space, mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually for a new partner to enter. (Davis even reckons simple things like making space in your chest of drawers for a man’s things can help. This weekend I’m emptying mine altogether.)
2 Missing Clarity
Not clear who you are, what your ‘core relationship needs’ are and what you bring to a relationship? You’ll need this before you can attract Mr Right.
3 I’m Miss Independent
Feeling ambivalent about wanting to be in a relationship? If you feel so independent you don’t need a man, he’s probably not going to show-up. Wearing the single hat and saying you want a relationship is incompatible.
4 Too busy whipping myself = Lack of self love
Continuous negative self talk lowers your vibrational energy, and stops you from being the truest and best version of yourself.
5 Holding onto the past
Not letting go of past relationships, hurts and wounds will keep you stuck and block you from meeting the right kind of guy. By holding on, you’re keeping your heart closed and guarded. Letting go of the past, being open and vulnerable, means you can attract someone who will really connect with you.
So there you go.
And once you know where you’re going wrong, you can start to change things, said Davis.
And luckily, she says she can help...
Details: Sarah Davis’ half day Soul Mate Magnetism workshops cost $49 and are held at Bondi Junction livingabravelife.com
Read Single in Sydney every Friday at dailytelegraph.com.au
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