Single in Sydney: Is there a dating apocalypse in Australia?

SARAH’S heard terrifying news for singles from the US. So is there a dating apocalypse? And how can you avoid it?

JOURNALIST Sarah Swain has been single (but dating) for longer than she cares to remember.

That’s because it’s tough out there, as any single will tell you, so to bring hope to others across the city, she’s sharing her no-holds-barred adventures on the Sydney single scene every Friday.

Week 28 Is there a Dating apocalypse?

Forget Deep Impact,Armageddon and even Sharknado; we’re heading for a disaster even Bruce

Willis couldn’t handle. Well, if a certain article is to be believed.

Because apparently, we’re hurtling towards a ‘dating apocalypse.’

You see this story in American magazine Vanity Fair magazine made me worried. Very worried.

And if you’re a single girl looking for Mr Right, it’ll worry you too.

It’s called Tinder and the Dawn of the Dating Apocalypse.

Basically, it says internet dating is changing the way blokes behave. For the worse.

Actor Bruce Willis is always on hand when there’s a disaster. Photo: Joshua Blanchard/FilmMagic

Is Tinder to blame? Photo: Supplied

It reports that their brains perceive there’s an endless supply of women out there, because of

Tinder. Other dating apps too, but mostly Tinder.

And because their brains now think there’s a surplus of women because of how easy it is to find

them on these apps, according to a psychologist quoted in the story, it’s having a big impact.

Apparently, when there’s a surplus of women- or even a perceived surplus — the

“whole mating system tends to shift towards short-term dating,” says the article.

And by short term, I mean the bloke in the story who had slept with eight girls in a week. Or was it five in eight days? Anyway, it was a lot. And he met them all on Tinder.

So is Australia next in line for this ‘apocalypse?’

Should I start storing up canned food and perhaps cats?

Too late. It’s already here, says Sydney sexologist Nikki Goldstein.

Nikki Goldstein said the so-called dating apocalypse is already here. Pic by Richard Gosling

“We always follow trends from the US very closely but with this one it has been immediate maybe thanks to the fast paced world of technology,” she said.

“Most singles these days are signed up to some sort of site or app.”

And she admits that this type of dating does have its downsides, but I’m relied to find she doesn’t seem too worried.

“It might make commitment harder due to the fact that sex is now on tap — literally with a tap of the phone — and people in the dating game in general are disposable,” she says.

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“People are also distracted. How can you get to know one person when you have multiple dates in one week?”

However, Goldstein says this ‘apocalypse’, might actually be good for singles.

Yes!

Deep Impact is a great apocalypic movie.

She reckons if somebody wants to commit, they will - whether they’re online dating or not.

“Due to the volume of singles at our fingertips, we are just finding these commitment phobes more quickly and in abundance,” she said.

Phew.

I’ve calmed down a bit since talking to Nikki. And I’ve cancelled the cat order.

But I’ve still got Bruce Willis on speed dial, just in case.

You see, in my experience, it’s not the men who want hook-ups that are the problem (and Goldstein advises being clear about what you want from the start to avoid becoming a ‘tinderella’ if you don’t want to).

No, it’s the ones who do seem to be looking for a girlfriend.

Are singles facing Armageddon?

You don’t just go on one date with them, you go on two or three, and maybe even snog.

They seem really interested and really genuine. And you get a little bit excited.

And then …. nothing.

You never hear from them again.

I could be wrong.

These blokes could have suddenly decided they couldn’t bear another date with you.

Or they could have lost interest because you didn’t sleep with them already.

Or maybe they lost their phone?

And it’s not just me.

Plenty of readers and friends have experienced this — in fact there’s a trendy new name for it — ghosting.

And I’d like to put it out there that maybe, just maybe, the reason they disappeared was because they couldn’t resist checking their phones to see who else was out there.

*Tinder’s Australian press representatives didn’t want to comment on this article.

Dr Nikki Goldstein’s book, #singlebutdating, is out now.

What do you think? Tweet me @swainey123​