Backroom Baz: Golfers tee off over rumours Martin Pakula jumped waiting list

Rumours a Labor MP jumped the 10-year membership queue at swanky Victoria Golf Club and had golfers teeing off have travelled way off course.

Martin Pakula has got some noses out of joint at Victoria Golf Club.

He might be the minister for fun, but Martin Pakula has got some noses out of joint. Skipping the waiting list at posh golf clubs has that effect. If only it were true.

There are some incredibly teed off members at the swanky Victoria Golf Club amid concerns Pakula was given a fast ride to membership recently.

Usually you’d expect to wait 10 years before getting full rights at the club and some members believe Pakula has jumped the queue.

Conservative estimates tip 90 per cent of members have been left royally miffed, meaning free drinks at the 19th seem unlikely.

After all, it was Pakula’s government that banned golf, then took away the toilets!

However, Baz reckons it’s all much ado about nothing. Pakula says the rumours flying around are completely untrue.

“I’m a restricted member and I imagine I’ll stay a restricted member for the amount of time that restricted members remain restricted members.”

Yes, minister.

Victorian MP Will Fowles. Picture: David Crosling

FOWLES GETS CUT

Victorians were itching to get their luscious locks lopped on Friday after the state’s lockdown was lifted.

Some were even casting around for hairdressers open at 11.59pm on Thursday to get in first.

One eager customer was the Labor member for Burwood, Will Fowles. Well, sort of.

Fowles, who shot to political infamy in 2019 due to a rampage at a Canberra hotel that led to a stint in drug and alcohol rehab, outsourced the job to a staff member.

And it’s unclear whether the MP’s priority was the trim, or the photo opportunity.

Fowles’s staff member cold-contacted barbers and stylists in the Burwood region via social media, asking for “a barber shop that is willing to open at 11.59pm this Thursday to film Will getting his haircut”.

The staff member noted an added bonus for the long-suffering small business, shuttered for months by the government.

“The idea is to promote barbers reopening and we can also of course promote your business!”

Baz will be checking his social media feeds to see whether anyone ‘snipped’ up the curly offer.

KENNETT HAS GUY IN KNOTS

Lockdowns have given most of us the option of avoiding the ironing.

But Spring St politicians have no choice but to suit up for the cameras and it appears some people face higher standards than others.

Baz’s spies this week overheard Opposition Leader Matthew Guy claiming he cops a call from former premier Jeff Kennett when he doesn’t wear a tie for the TV crews.

It tends to be the opposite way for current Premier Daniel Andrews, who only dons neckwear when it’s a sitting day in parliament.

Matthew Guy doing Jeff Kennett Proud at a press conference. Picture: NCA NewsWire

RAISED EYEBROWS

It may have taken an early break but that didn’t stop plenty of talk about IBAC during the week.

At the other end of town, many judicial eyebrows were raised, and conversations had in hushed tones, about the decision of IBAC commissioner Robert Redlich to limit the scope of the inquiry such that Daniel Andrews and his factional allies are unlikely to rate much of a mention.

Some have wondered whether Redlich’s focus is far too narrow, and whether in the interest of justice, he would do well to zoom out a little.

Some have wondered if Robert Redlich’s focus is too narrow. Picture: Getty

FRIENDLY FIRE

Dixers are a ridiculous part of politics. Named after American columnist Dorothy Dix, who reputedly made up her own questions to answer, they involve a government MP asking a friendly question to a minister during question time, usually written by the minister’s office.

But they are not typically asked by crossbenchers from competing parties.

Andy Meddick knows how to serve up a Dixer. Picture: Mike Dugdale

That’s why it was so bizarre in a recent upper house question time when Animal Justice Party MP Andy Meddick gave Training and Skills Minister Gayle Tierney a dixer-like query over free TAFE being extended to vet nursing.

“I am constantly impressed by the government’s efforts to bring TAFE back to life after the Liberals gutted it during their last time in government, bringing the sector to its knees,” he said.

“Can you please advise when the free TAFE program will commence?”

Needless to say, the minister was all too happy to provide the details while a few eyes rolled into the back of heads around the room.

There’s been a fair few animal friendly government announcements of late. Must be lots of back scratching going on in the corridors of power.

MERRY-GO-ROUND GRINDS ON

It can be a bit of a merry-go-round on Spring St for some, once they hop on they never leave.

Too true for Sashi Balaraman, the recently resigned chief of staff to treasurer Tim Pallas.

The not long departed Balaraman has popped up again in a $450,000 role at the Suburban Rail Loop Authority. Some have wondered if it’s a mere coincidence, or is the boys’ club still at play?

GUESS WHO

Which senior federal MP has been quietly roasted by a well-known comedy troupe, with footage of the incident yet to emerge?

Originally published as Backroom Baz: Golfers tee off over rumours Martin Pakula jumped waiting list