Only someone inhabiting an alternate universe could have missed the fact that Qantas is presently bedlam. Interminable queues (at airports and on the phone), lost bags, cancelled flights, refunds in the never-never and, in return, extortionate fares.

On Thursday, veteran chief executive Alan Joyce apologised and issued $50 vouchers to his livid customers. The $50 is an impost posing as a gift; on the same day, Joyce jacked up international tickets by yet another 20 per cent.