Albo bombshell proves you never truly know someone until you’ve elected them prime minister

Anthony Albanese’s election victory proves you never truly know someone until you’ve elected them prime minister, writes Joe Hildebrand.

JUST when you thought the election had thrown up every possible shock and surprise, it turns out it saved its biggest bombshell until after the campaign was over.

And so the nation was stunned to discover this week that Anthony Albanese’s middle name is Norman.

While the constitutional ramifications of this are as yet unclear, it has certainly proved the old adage that you never truly know someone until you’ve elected them prime minister.

As someone who has known and loved Albo for many years, it was certainly news to me. And while I can’t say it would have changed my mind about him, it would certainly have prompted a few follow-up questions.

For one thing, “Anthony Albanese” is a really good name. It rolls off the tongue, it rhymes and it has an alliteration usually reserved for the secret identities of superheroes. It also has the convenient advantage that whenever anyone says I should familiarise myself with AA, I can confidently tell them that I already have.

Anthony Albanese. Picture: Wendell Teodoro/AFP

So why on earth would anyone want to stick a Norman in it? It would be like finding out Action Jackson’s middle name was Basil.

It’s also not very on-brand for Albo. I was spruiking his credentials to a Greek mate who runs a fish’n’chip shop who asked if he would look after people like him.

“Oh yes,” I said. “He’s very pro-small business.”

“No, not businesspeople,” my mate said, “wogs.”

“Oh, of course!” I laughed, relieved. “He is one!”

And then I find out his middle name is Norman. It’s like the whole time he’s been on a reality-TV show called Undercover WASP.

To be fair though, I am a bit of traditionalist in this area: As far as I’m concerned, if it’s not in the Bible, it’s not a real name. In fact, anything more exotic than John is a bit suss.

And at least I will be honestly able to say to my grandchildren that I was alive to witness the Norman Conquest.

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Originally published as Albo bombshell proves you never truly know someone until you’ve elected them prime minister