Twitter’s future owner Elon Musk has green-lit Donald Trump’s return to the platform, saying the decision to ban him permanently in the wake of the January 6th storming of the Capitol last year as “foolish in the extreme” and “morally wrong”.
“I think that was a mistake, because it alienated a large part of the country and did not ultimately result in Donald Trump not having a voice,” Musk, who regularly claims Twitter censors free speech, said.
Gross girl Tok (which is actually just my reality tok but gross girl rolled off the tongue 🤣) I also won’t be showering or drinking any water today
The movement has been amplified by former Aussie boss of Bumble-turned-entrepreneur Michelle Battersby. Her first video on the topic has chalked up more than 2.2m views.
Please excuse me, I'm off to not wash my sheets or hair.
It’s not just me who’s “meh”
According to fresh opinion polls published this morning a bunch of politicians - even high profile ones including Treasurer Josh Frydenberg - are at risk of losing their jobs when we head to the polls on May 21.
The research based on a survey of close to 19,000 voters across the 151 lower house seats that make up our federal parliament show he and his Liberal colleague Tim Wilson, in the Melbourne electorates of Kooyong and Goldstein respectively, may be defeated by independent candidates.
It’s the most comprehensive poll ever conducted in Australia by YouGov for The Australian - the Greg Wiggle to our Emma.
King Charles preview
The Queen was unable to open the British parliament in London overnight due to "ongoing mobility issues", so Charlie, Cams and Wills were dispatched to the House of Lords to read her annual speech.
A lot has since been reported about the placement of chairs and crown jewels involved here:
Prince Charles, Prince of Wales reads the Queen's speech next to her Imperial State Crown.
"An empty throne would have been a powerful symbol of the Queen’s absence. Instead the sovereign’s throne had simply been replaced by the consort’s throne, slightly smaller but no less impressive," The Times wrote.
"The arrangement delivered a powerful message of its own, different from the one expected but no less resonant: a message of continuity."
(Don't @ me, royal feng shui is my kink).
Chinese whispers
Speaking of powerful eastern energy, hell hath no fury like disaffected Chinese government officials.
According to one of our top spies, pissed off CCP operatives are spilling more tea than Elizabeth did out of Hyacinth Bucket’s "collectable china" during the entire run of Keeping up Appearances.
The head of Australia’s overseas spy agency, the Australian Secret Intelligence Agency, Paul Symon has hinted that disaffected Chinese officials are increasingly providing his operatives with info because of concerns of the growing authoritarianism under President Xi Jinping.
This insight comes off the back of news breaking overnight that Chinese Foreign Minister Wang Yi will travel to the Solomon Islands within days to sign that security pact. A trip our defence minister Peter Dutton has labelled as "provocative".
What a coke up
Police in Newcastle are now on the hunt for cocaine smugglers after a diver with 50kg (not a typo) of coke drowned earlier this week.
The bloke's body was found with $20m worth of drugs nearby. NSW Police believe the attempted importation happened on Sunday night and stemmed from a ship that left Argentina a month ago and was organised by a "well drilled, professional group".
They are now on the look out for two other people they believe were involved after being spotted in rubber duck style boats during the time of the incident.
Schools rule
About eight schools around NSW are set to trial new school hours to make life easier for modern, working families.
The plan to phase out the traditional 9am-3pm school hours will kick off from Term 3 and see an increase in after school activities like homework clubs being established or expanded.
Permission to swap these with working hours please. Adulting should also be capped at six-hour intervals.
Fey what?
Tina Fey has said Kevin Spacey, of House of Cards fame and #MeToo infamy, cracked onto her when she was a cast member of Saturday Night Live and he headlined an episode back in 2006.
She made the comments to her favourite collaborator and mate Amy Poehler during a panel game for the Netflix Is A Joke comedy festival.
Poehler said former (and the late) Republican presidential candidate John McCain was the most famous person who ever hit on her.
