Audi Q5 55 TFSI review: Green? In your dreams

You will be doing your bit for Planet Greta and will sleep soundly at night. There’s just one problem...

The Audi Q5 Picture: Audi

I recently hosted a day’s shooting on my farm. It was all very Edwardian, with lots of kids running about, surly teenagers overdoing it on the sloe gin and dads looking proud when their sons managed to smoke a low hen.

There was one modern touch, though. I do not believe in excessive walking. I believe God invented the Range Rover for a reason: to get you and your gun as close as possible to the action. But on the day of my shoot, the ground was very wet, so on occasion we had to huff and puff the last few hundred yards.

This did not go down well with the young urban fraternity. So instead of coming along, they all sat in my car, running the big diesel engine with the heater on full as they discussed their determination to save the planet by giving up meat and how they’ll never use plastic. Apart from when they are awake. Afterwards, they told me they had to run the engine because “we were cold”. And that sums up the problem with trying to be green. It’s great, as long as it isn’t inconvenient.

I absolutely sympathise. I want to make a difference. I don’t want to see a baby turtle choking to death on the wrapping from a Bounty bar, and I worry about weather records being broken all over the world. So I’m not going to wear beef-scented cologne or stamp on an otter. But nor am I going to wipe my bottom with a smooth stone or go to work on the bus. Because, well, I worry, but I don’t worry that much.

All of which brings me to the Audi Q5. This is perceived to be a high-riding off-roader that can deal with flooded rivers and mountains and wolves. So it’s popular with school-run mums who think if it can deal with the Rockies in a blizzard, it will be extremely safe for little Jasper.

And there’s more. Prices start at $65,900, which isn’t bad for a spacious, four-wheel-drive family car. It’s quite economical, too, and being an Audi, it’s likely to be pretty reliable. So while it doesn’t float my boat, it ticks all of the boxes for those who aren’t “carnoisseurs” or petrolheads or speed freaks.

These, however, are unusual times, so Audi has launched a new version. The model I drove rejoices under the snappy handle of Q5 55 TFSI e quattro S Line Competition, and it is a plug-in hybrid. Which means the batteries can be charged from the mains or via its 2-litre engine. There’s a great deal of electronic cleverness as well. Sensors can detect when you may need all-wheel drive and when you won’t. And then there’s the predictive efficiency assistant, which looks, among other things, at the sat nav and how far you are from the car in front before deciding how much juice can be taken from the electric motor to top up the batteries. Or whether it’s OK to free-wheel. The system works with the cruise control, so sometimes it will brake or accelerate of its own accord. The idea is that the plug-in hydrid Q5 “feels” normal, but can still achieve 2.6 litres per 100km.

That’s lovely, then. You get what feels like a standard Q5 but instead of leaving a trail of dead polar bears in your wake, there will be rosy-faced children playing in the garden with their pink-lunged grandparents. You will be doing your bit for Planet Greta and will sleep soundly at night.

Plus, when you are in a hurry, it’s no slouch. Because when the engine and the electric motor are holding hands as if they’re in a 1970s ad for Coca-Cola, you get 270kW. Which means 0 to 100km/h in 5.3 seconds and a 240km/h top speed. You can even do 135km/h on battery thrust alone. Except, there’s no way in hell you will achieve 2.6 litres per 100km. That’s just a theoretical possibility. In reality, fuel consumption will be only slightly better than a normal Q5’s. And don’t get carried away by the idea of tooling down the motorway at 135km/h on electric power only, because at that speed the batteries will be flat in about no seconds at all.

It gets worse, because I couldn’t get it to run on electric power at all. I stabbed at various buttons in the manner of an iPhone user who’s been given a Samsung to make a call, but nothing seemed to change.

And, like all hybrids, it had a mind of its own at roundabouts. Sometimes I’d lift my foot off the accelerator and it felt like I’d jammed on the brakes; sometimes it just coasted. I never knew what it was going to do next.

Finally, there’s the price. The car I tested costs $117,000, and that’s a huge amount for what is essentially a medium-sized school-run car.

Audi Q5 55 TFSI E at a glance

Engine: 2.0-litre turbo-petrol four-cylinder plus electric motor (270kW/500Nm).

Average fuel: 2.1 litres per 100km

Transmission: Seven-speed dual-clutch automatic, all-wheel drive

Price: This variant n/a in Australia; Q5 range from $65,900

Rating: ★★★