Ford Mustang lights up the silver screen

AS one critic said, Need For Speed is really one big ad for the Mustang Shelby GT500

A scene from Need For Speed featuring a Mustang Shelby GT500

“Fiat 500L: The rich inner life of a gutless clown car” said Dan Neil in The Wall Street Journal. “2003 Chrysler Crossfire: A half-decent concept that failed to make the grade in the real world — a polite way of saying it looked like a dog taking a dump,” said Jeremy Clarkson. “1978 Ford Pinto: The Pinto's tendency to explode during rear-end collisions earned it a reputation as ‘the barbecue that seats four’,” said MSN Auto’s Claire Martin. “To rub your hands all over that aluminum body? It’s just a very sensual automobile,” said Martyn Schorr of his 2006 Ford GT.

It would be good if these car reviewers told us what they really think. Movie reviewers have no such problems.

For instance, writing about my new favourite movie, Need For Speed, in the New York Post, Kyle Smith says “young men and fast cars are automatically stupid together, but even if you set your intelligence level at ‘off’ — and you should — you’ll get a hangover from this cocktail of 200-proof stupid, clinking with moron ice cubes and with an idiot cherry on top”.

Kyle, like many involved in the arts reviewing caper, have very little cultural insight. Here is the movie that draws on the rich 20-year history of the most successful racing video game series in the world (more than 140 million copies sold), with no gratuitous sex or violence except for multiple car smashes that kill a few drivers and some of the best car wrecks since Blues Brothers 2000.

Look, the plot is deceptively simple. Well, no, it’s just simple. Mechanic goes to jail for crime committed by his ex-girlfriend’s boyfriend and he can solve all his money woes and revenge the death of his best friend by driving a Ford Mustang across the US to race the world’s most expensive fast cars, and naughty people try to stop him by ramming him with trucks and SUVs. Helicopters are involved.

The best part about most of the car crashes is that you see serious cars get totalled in way that puts new meaning in the words “million-dollar supercars somersault through the air before plunging back to earth in fireballs”. In fact they are just replica Saleen, Lambo, McLaren, GTA Spano, Bugatti and Koenigsegg bodies stapled on to sleds fitted with 316kw LS3 V8s as used in Corvettes and Holden HSVs. On the sled is stapled a metal chair that the driver sits in and drives really fast.

As one critic said, Need For Speed is really one big ad for the Mustang Shelby GT500. This is incorrect, as it is also a really big ad for the Koenigsegg Agra.

Who cares? Mustangs have been in 3200 movies since 1964 when Tania Mallet drove a white one while Sean Connery drove an Aston Martin DB5 in Goldfinger. Only one winner there — Tania.

If you want to buy one of the NFS movie special Mustangs, head down to the South Florida Fairgrounds next week. Barrett-Jackson will be auctioning a custom-designed wide body Shelby GT rolling on unique Forgiato 22-inch alloy wheels. As Mr Barrett says: “The visual sizzle is amplified by custom silver paint with Kona Blue racing stripes and angel-eye fog lamps in the grille.” Yup, I don’t know what that means either. But mention the Weekend A Plus motoring section for a free hot-lap in a Shelby GT500, Focus ST and Fiesta ST. This is the car Ford wouldn’t let me test drive.

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