Fair dinkum foreign affairs

A LOT of you have complained about the lack of Australianness in this column. OK, here's the greatest motoring hits of Gondwanaland.

Ferrari Monza Spider

A LOT of you have been complaining about the lack of Australianness in this column. Too much about driving fast foreign cars, going to foreign auctions, drinking too much free French champagne, meeting too many fast foreign persons of the opposite sex and not enough paying attention to matters Southern Cross.

OK, here's your post-Australia Day dose of the greatest motoring hits of Gondwanaland.

Let's start with the Post Vintage Car Club of Tasmania display on the lawns of Parliament House in Hobart last month. Now to understand my reaction to this display you need to know I had just been wandering around Dave Walsh's Museum of Old and New Art, which seems to have a lot to do with people killing themselves during bursts of kinky horizontal folk dancing. Surprisingly, old Egyptian royals seem to be the worst offenders.

Dave Walsh is a fan of very big Mercs and despite that, he has a sense of humour. His parking spot says "God" and his partner's says "God's Mistress".

Anyway, by the time I got to the car show I would have found a flat tyre erotic but there on the grass was one of the most beautiful cars I have ever seen and a collection of Holdens, Zephyrs, Triumphs and Healeys that brought on a tsunami of nostalgia.

How could we forget bench seats? Dad driving the FJ, mum near the door and me, standing next to dad, trying to cover his eyes as we roared along the Princes Highway. The fun police have taken away many of the things that were great about this country.

The highlight was the incredible silver 1937 Riley TT Sprite Racer that is still good for 180km/h and still competing in the occasional Targa. Shannons sold a replica some time back for $41,000 and Bonhams sold an original but nowhere near as beautiful for $100,000. In their day these cars were Bugatti and Bentley beaters.

What's more Australian than drifting? I know what you're thinking. You're thinking drifting is a sport invented by tyre companies to beat the global economic slowdown and the general push against noisy, loud extreme car use and introduced to the world by young Japanese lads throwing Subarus sideways, side by side around concrete race tracks.

That's all correct but Melbourne's Rally Drive Experience offers a true-blue version where concrete has been swapped for dirt. I paid about $200 to show the small but perfectly formed Glen McIntyre how to take a Nissan sideways in the dust. I would add the precision driving course (aka handbrake turns) for a perfect but muddy day out.

In all these travels I decided to road-test three moderately priced cars. I hired a Holden Cruze and a Kia Cerato from Avis and tried to hire a Toyota 86 from Hertz. Despite confirming emails, texts and paying real money, when I arrived at Hertz they said, "Tough tyres, no Toyota".

Driving the Cerato was the most fun I've had in small car for a long time. For $20,000 it comes with everything except a bench seat and a choke. Why would you buy anything else? Because you could get the 1982 Rothmans Porsche 956 Group C Sports-Prototype for a bit under $4 million.

What's more Australian than cigarette companies sponsoring race cars? Having Adelaide boy Vern Schuppan race them in Europe. The legendary Porsche pilot and Derek Bell took it to second in the Spa 100.

It's part of Queensland property owner Pete Harburg's collection. Pete is sadly parting with his amazing $25 million bunch of legendary cars at RM Auctions big night out in Paris this week.

Another one of Pete's to go under the hammer is a 1955 Ferrari 750 Monza Spider.

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