Two solo travellers hit the road together, but can they stay friends?

Judging by the extent of the championing of solo travel these days you’d be forgiven for thinking it’s the only way to have an authentic travel experience.

But people travel in many different ways – as couples, with families and in groups – and each arrangement has its pluses and minuses.

The one configuration that rarely gets a mention is travelling with a friend. Which is odd given how frequently it happens. So what are the merits and challenges of travelling with a mate? We decided to find out.

Writers Rob McFarland and Julie Miller during their epic road trip.Credit: Rob McFarland

We’ve been friends for 18 years but we also both travel for a living as travel writers. Which means we each have our own strategies and strengths, not to mention foibles and quirks.

To put it all to the test, we choose a journey that’s been a buddy movie stalwart for decades: the US road trip.

Starting in Los Angeles, we’ll head east into the California high desert, visiting Joshua Tree National Park and Palm Springs before crossing into Arizona.

After exploring Phoenix, we’ll veer north towards Sedona and Flagstaff before heading back to LA via the longest remaining original section of Route 66.

With spectacular scenery, intriguing attractions and plenty of only-in-America roadside kitsch, it has all the hallmarks of an epic adventure.

Only one question remains: will it be a thrilling, Thelma & Louise-style escapade or a Dumb and Dumber disaster?

She says

I’m a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants traveller; Rob is a spreadsheet guy. So for once, I’m happy to defer to a more methodical brain to take care of journey practicalities.

Rob books the hire car (examining it for pre-existing scratches with an eagle eye); he steadfastly logs expenses en route; and I even acquiesce to his playlist, having lost mine when my old phone drowned in a toilet.

The Desert Discovery Trail, Arizona.Credit: Adam Rodriguez

What I bring to the table are impeccable driving skills (LA freeways? No fear!), punctuality (Rob, it turns out, is a morning faffer) and a no-stress attitude.

I only have one demand – single rooms, allowing us to debrief in solitude without the distraction of someone else’s snoring.

Economically, that can present a challenge for friends travelling together – but as we’ll largely be staying in roadside motels (revamped retro gems, no less), it’s a financial sacrifice I’m prepared to make.

One thing we have in common is a love of nature and hiking: except I’m a tortoise, Rob’s a hare. Our first organised activity, however, certainly puts his alacrity to the test – a hike in the evocative Joshua Tree National Park.

Rather than an adrenaline-pumping power walk, guide Conan Allen from Joshua Tree Connectivity is a fellow dawdler, pausing to examine the minutiae of the landscape and point out shrubs long used in traditional medicine.

Levitating under droning frequencies during a sound bath meditation in a Native American medicine wheel.Credit: Joshua Tree Connectivity

Joshua Tree, Allen also tells us, is surrounded by vortexes, the energy exuding from its mountains a palpable force. Later, during a sound bath meditation conducted in a Native American medicine wheel, he invites us to harness this power through sound, created by a range of instruments from metallic bowls to rainmakers.

As I lie in the growing shadows of sunset, I’m seemingly carried away by aliens, levitating under the droning frequencies; even so, I can’t resist the urge to open an eye, spying on Rob to see if he’s keeping a straight face. Surprisingly, he is; the energiser bunny has succumbed to the mysticism of the desert.

“Is your husband joining you for breakfast?” I’m asked the following morning at Joshua Tree Autocamp, a collection of stylishly kitted Airstream caravans. Ah, the assumptions of travelling with an age-appropriate male friend.

Anyone for breakfast? Airstream at the AutoCamp.

Today, however, travel hubby and I are splitting up, exploring Palm Springs independently. Rob has opted for another desert excursion; I’m drawn by the mid-century ambience of the city, taking an architecture tour with one of the founders of the Palm Springs Preservation Foundation, Kip Serafin.

With an extensive rolodex of mid-century masterpieces at his disposal, Serafin and I cruise the streets, admiring the distinctive clean lines of gorgeous homes built between 1940 and 1960, before sneaking inside a property Serafin personally manages – the former home of singer Dinah Shore.

Now owned by Leonardo DiCaprio, this Don Wexler-designed compound has remained largely untouched since 1964, its floor-to-ceiling windows spectacularly framing views of the San Jacinto mountains and a sparkling pool overlooked by a funky guest house.

As we head east towards Arizona, the dunes of the Sonoran Desert are increasingly peppered with saguaro cacti, looking their best in Phoenix’s Desert Botanical Garden. I would have liked to linger in this stunning collection of desert plants, but the searing heat (and Rob’s yawns) cut our time short.

A little luxury at the Ambiente Sedona.

Besides, Rob has his eye on the neighbouring Papago Park and its dominating landmark – Hole-in-the-Rock. He reckons he can bolt up the gape-mouthed monolith in 15 minutes; sure, off you go – I’ll wave from the carpark as you sweat it out!

After the big-city sensibility of Phoenix – good coffee, cocktail bars and the fun and gaudy Egyptian Hotel in all its retro glory – I’m looking forward to a night of luxury at our one splurge, Ambiente Sedona.

A “landscape hotel” featuring panoramic red rock vistas, this is truly a couple’s retreat, with every feature of its glass-walled atriums designed for lovers.

But, as we watch the sinking sun illuminate the fiery range from the rooftop terrace, wine in hand, I’m grateful for the company of my travel buddy – some moments are meant to be shared.

Some moments are meant to be shared.Credit: Rob McFarland

As with Joshua Tree, Sedona lures seekers of spiritual and metaphysical enlightenment, with four distinct vortexes said to emit healing cosmic forces.

Who are we to argue? So, with open minds and bare feet to connect with the earth, we embark on a Pink Jeep Vortex Tour, embracing the woo-woo in true Sedona style.

I feel similar wonder just outside Flagstaff, at arguably the biggest surprise of our journey – Walnut Canyon National Monument. Here, hidden among vertiginous cliffs, are cave dwellings built by ancient communities who grew crops along the canyon’s rim.

There was little water on hand, so the resilience and ingenuity of these people is astounding; even more astonishing is the speed I hike the 1.6-kilometre Island Trail, puffing and panting to keep up with lanky Rob as we battle the 4pm closing deadline.

Hackberry General Store on Route 66.Credit: iStock

Northern Arizona hosts the longest uninterrupted stretch of Route 66, covering 250 kilometres between the cities of Seligman and Kingman. The driving force behind the preservation of Route 66, barber Angel Delgadillo, lives in Seligman, an audacious slice of Americana, where every building keeps the legend alive and lures busloads of tourists keen to get their kicks.

Later, we pause for a photo opportunity at Hackberry General Store, a time warp from the ’50s with original bowsers and signage, its walls lined with dollar bills left by visitors making their contribution to America’s history. In Kingman, we delve deeper into the road’s colourful stories at the Arizona Route 66 Museum.

Our final overnight stop before heading back to LA is the resort town of Lake Havasu – a waterfront anomaly in the desert, popular with recreational fishers, boaters and retirees.

To celebrate the survival of our friendship, we’re concluding our week with an activity we both enjoy – a kayak tour with Southwest Outfitters. Of course, there’s a twist – our vessels are Hobie kayaks, propelled by pedals. We’re literally up the creek without a paddle – just another quirk in our great American dream.

He says

Perhaps the biggest difference between travelling with a partner and a friend is that there’s less pressure to do everything together.

So when Julie wants to look around Palm Springs’ boutiques (an activity I would sacrifice a limb to avoid), I’m free to jump on the Palm Springs Aerial Tramway and be whisked 1790 metres up the stunning Chino Canyon, enjoying sweeping desert views from the world’s largest rotating tramway.

I also don’t share her interest in the city’s fabled mid-century architecture, so am happy to let her nose through Leonardo DiCaprio’s underwear drawer while I go on an excursion with Big Wheel Tours.

Leaving the city’s manicured, palm tree-lined avenues, we cycle through the surrounding desert towards Andreas Canyon, a verdant, spring-fed oasis that’s the ancestral home of the local Agua Caliente Band of Cahuilla Indians.

The rocks, trees and streams of Andreas Canyon out of Palm Springs.Credit: iStock

Exploring the canyon on foot, we hike through a prickly landscape of barrel and cholla cacti, passing 15-metre-high California fan palms with hula-style frond skirts.

We discover the remains of an outdoor native kitchen, a rock slab with weathered holes once used to grind corn, pine nuts and mesquite beans, while high above us nimble-footed mountain goats deftly skip around the mountainous terrain.

In Flagstaff, we divide and conquer again. As Julie learns more about the city’s Route 66 connections on a walking tour, I hire an e-bike from Rides N Motion and explore its public art.

Cycling around a US city can often be a harrowing, therapy-inducing experience, but Flagstaff is the most bike-friendly American metropolis I’ve visited. Not only is it criss-crossed with dedicated bike lanes, but also for once the local motorists don’t seem hell-bent on eradicating me.

As for the art, it’s fabulous, with everything from abstract sculptures and photorealistic portraits to thought-provoking murals and historical frescoes.

This is my first visit to Flagstaff and I’m smitten. The city has an attractive downtown full of grand 19th-century buildings with sweeping verandas, several fantastic breweries (check out Dark Sky Brewing Co.’s intriguing range of IPAs and sours) and is surrounded by national monuments peppered with ancient pueblos and cliff dwellings.

In 2001, the city became the world’s first International Dark Sky Place and at the Lowell Observatory you can join a stargazing tour, see the 1929 telescope that discovered Pluto and – from November onwards – visit a swish new astronomy centre.

Stargaze in the world’s first International Dark Sky Place at Lowell Observatory Museum.

Of course, we also do plenty of things together, and it’s a treat to travel with someone who enjoys being active too.

In Joshua Tree National Park, we tackle some of the myriad hiking trails, posing for grinning photos in front of its namesake trees (which are actually a type of yucca).

Even while staying at the uber-fancy Ambiente Sedona, I manage to lure her out on an early-morning hike and then promptly lose the trail so we end up having to scramble along a drainage ditch (I’m amazed she didn’t mention this).

Travelling with a mate also broadens your horizons. I’m not sure I would have signed up for the sound bath meditation in Joshua Tree if I’d been on my own, but, to my surprise, I love it.

Similarly, I probably wouldn’t have chosen a Jeep tour in Sedona, but it delivers us to some of the region’s less-visited sites, including the stunningly scenic Mystic Vista, a remote lookout surrounded by a dramatic curtain of rust-red escarpments.

I even play along when the guide suggests we remove our shoes so we can “feel the energy”. I certainly feel something, but it’s mainly scepticism.

I return the favour by dragging my reluctant travel buddy to Phoenix’s Musical Instrument Museum. Claiming to be the world’s only global musical instrument museum, it has more than 4200 instruments from every corner of the earth.

The Musical Instrument Museum in Phoenix.

Thankfully, the gamble pays off because it’s outstanding, although Julie might argue that we needn’t have spent quite so much time in the banjo section.

Naturally, it helps if you and your travel amigo have a similar outlook and fortunately, we’re both curious and up for random detours.

Which is how we end up visiting the apocalyptic art installations on the shores of the Salton Sea, taking selfies with a bright pink apatosaurus at the Cabazon Dinosaurs roadside attraction and exploring Desert Christ Park, a 1.5-hectare garden in California’s Yucca Valley that contains numerous dazzling white sculptures of Jesus, including several of him napping.

Solo travel has its benefits, but one aspect that can suck is the whole “table for one” scenario. Dining with a friend is just more enjoyable.

Not only do you get to try each other’s dishes (thankfully, we’re both amenable to this), but you also get to relive the day’s highlights and laugh away any mishaps (seriously, the trail signs really weren’t clear).

Lose an evening sipping libations at Bitter and Twisted Cocktail Parlour.

One of my favourite memories is of us sitting around the firepit outside my Airstream trailer in Joshua Tree, sipping wine and making s’mores under a star-dusted desert sky. In Phoenix, we spend a tipsy night sampling one-too-many libations at the award-winning Bitter and Twisted Cocktail Parlour.

And in Palm Springs, we feel like Hollywood A-listers while enjoying a fabulous feast of Spanish fare in the glamorous surroundings of Villa Royale.

I could have done all these things on my own, but they wouldn’t have been as much fun. As the travel cliche goes: “Sometimes all you need is a great friend and a tank of gas.”

Five tips for travelling with a friend

Choose someone with a similar travel style
If your friend’s idea of a perfect holiday is drinking cocktails by a pool while yours is hiking in the Himalayas, it’s probably not going to work.

Ensure you have a similar budget
Nothing kills the holiday vibe like squabbling over money. Make sure you’re on the same page regarding budgets and costs.

Divide and conquer
Play to each other’s strengths. If you enjoy planning, volunteer to do the research. If you love spreadsheets (and who wouldn’t), offer to keep track of the finances.

Ensure you have culinary compatibility
Face it. If you have wildly different dietary preferences, it’s going to be tough to find eateries that you’ll both enjoy.

Keep a sense of humour
Travel can be stressful. Look for the funny side and you can often transform an irritating mishap into a treasured memory (or at least a good story).

Five famous road trip buddies

Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon
Playing augmented versions of themselves, Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon have embarked on four versions of The Trip (to northern England, Italy, Spain and Greece), with largely improvised banter and very British ruminations on masculinity, romance and the arts.

Ewan McGregor and Charley Boorman
In 2004, actors Ewan McGregor and Charley Boorman travelled from London to New York City on motorbikes, documenting the gruelling quest in Long Way Round. The pair continued their adventures with Long Way Down (Scotland to South Africa, 2007) and Long Way Up (Ushuaia to Los Angeles, 2020)

Bob Hope and Bing Crosby
The original Hollywood travel buddies filmed seven Road to … comedies between 1940 and 1962, with destinations including Singapore, Morocco and Bali. The goofball misadventures feature snappy one-liners, musical numbers and romance, usually in the guise of Dorothy Lamour.

Geena Davis and Susan Sarandon
Following the spiralling exploits of best friends on the run from the law, Thelma & Louise, the 1991 feminist road movie, not only introduced the world to a young Brad Pitt, but features one of cinema’s most memorable final scenes.

Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels
In Dumb and Dumber, the comedic actors play two dimwitted friends, Lloyd and Harry, who take a road trip to Aspen in a dog-mobile to return a briefcase. With their relentlessly stupid antics, the film takes the buddy road movie to new levels of ridiculousness.

The details

Fly
Delta Air Lines has a direct daily flight from Sydney to Los Angeles with connections from Melbourne and other capitals. See delta.com

Drive
Budget has a rental office at Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) and several in downtown LA. See budget.com.au

The writers travelled as guests of Delta Air Lines, Brand USA (visittheusa.com), Visit Greater Palm Springs (visitgreaterpalmsprings.com) and the Arizona Office of Tourism (visitarizona.com).