Shocking act on Sydney train exposes horrifying Aussie truth

On a busy train on my commute home from work, I witnessed an awful act that exposes the soul destroying reality of being a woman.

A shocking act witnessed on a Sydney train has exposed the horrifying truth about living in Australia for half of the population.

I boarded a busy train after finishing work on Wednesday afternoon, and within the two stops it takes me to travel to my home in the city’s inner west, a young girl was violated in plain sight by a fellow passenger.

She had been holding onto the railing in the centre of a packed carriage when a young man unexpectedly stood behind her, pressing his body against hers and essentially trapped her against the bars.

The girl was only about half his size, and her small frame became encased within his as he dominantly held both his hands around either side of her under the guise of holding on.

I’m not sure how old she was, I’d guess somewhere between 11 and 13, but I knew in my gut it wasn’t right.

Instinctively, I pulled off my headphones to confront the man, but before I had the chance the girl’s mum had yanked her out from underneath him.

In a split second, she was pulled to safety, but as I locked eyes with the girl across the carriage I knew the damage was already done.

Statistics show that 78 per cent of Australian women have experienced sexual harassment in public spaces, and often it occurs without any intervention, which only “deepens the trauma”.

The most common forms of harassment endured include inappropriate and unwanted sexual looks or gestures, such as staring or leering, that leave victims feeling uncomfortable.

Other examples include sexually suggestive or intrusive comments, whistling, unwanted touching and even somebody exposing themselves in a sexual manner.

However, other types of street harassment include “accidentally” brushing against someone, invading a person’s space, pressing or rubbing against the person’s body, the 2022 Stand Up report said.

“Street harassment is not always clear to identify. Its often very subtle and insidious. But whenever it’s unwanted verbal, non-verbal, physical conduct of a sexual nature, it’s harassment,” it determined.

I witnessed a shocking act on a Sydney train that exposes a horrifying truth about the reality of living in Australia for women. Picture: Rebekah Scanlan / news.com.au

78 per cent of Australian women have experienced sexual harassment in public spaces. Picture: Rebekah Scanlan / news.com.au

In Australia, it is against the law for a person to sexually harass anyone else in many areas of public life.

While it is not a crime exclusively committed by men, the 2021-22 Personal Safety Survey (PSS) released by the Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS) found women were more likely to experience sexual harassment by a male than a female.

Whereas men were about as likely to experience sexual harassment by a male as by a female.

However, sexual harassment is just one cog in the huge problematic wheel that explains why public places often feel unsafe for women.

Data from the Australian Sexual Offence Statistical (ASOS) collection, published July 2024, shows over 1 in 5 (2.2 million) women have experienced sexual violence since the age of 15.

The situation is so bad, it has been described by experts as an “epidemic of violence” against women which has left half of our population feeling unsafe everywhere they go. Even in their own homes.

It’s this relentless feeling of danger that has left women furious, and why, as I locked eyes with that young girl on the train, I had to fight back tears.

In fact I was so livid, that when I got off a few minutes later, I pulled out my phone and recorded the monologue of rage that was coursing through my body.

“She looked at me, and she gave me these eyes, and it was as if she understood now that this was always going to be an issue for her,” I said, tears stinging my cheeks.

“That men are constantly going to be invading her space... and I just felt my heart sink for her in that moment.

“Because I knew that this is what the existence of being a woman in the world, even in 2024, is like.

“Men will just insert themselves into places they shouldn’t and they will make you feel small and uncomfortable.”

Anger coursed through my body after witnessing a man push his body up against a young girl on the train. Picture: Rebekah Scanlan / news.com.au

After, I shared the video on TikTok, and it quickly clocked up hundreds of thousands of views and attracted a heartbreaking avalanche of comments.

One of the most poignant was from a woman who remarked: “You literally watched her innocence of the world disappear before your eyes. This is so sad.”

“We women know exactly what you are talking and feeling unfortunately,” another replied.

As another stated: “That would have scared that little girl so much. So intimidating.”

Others shared their own experiences of sexual harassment and assault on public transport, proving just how prevalent the issue is.

“This gives me horrible flashbacks to a situation happening to me on a train in my mid 20s. The train was packed with men yet no one said or did anything to help me,” revealed one.

“I was on a really packed train in Melbourne and these men were pushing against me. I’m 21 but it made me so uncomfy,” someone else recalled.

As one revealed: “I’ve had so many experiences like this on public transport dating all the way back to the 80s.”

“I recently was on a very crowded train during peak hour going into work and a man had his groin pressed against my thigh. I completely froze, got off the train and went into work just completely numb,” added another.

Some commenters insisted I should have “spoken out”, despite the fact the mum had intervened and pulled the girl to safety, but as one woman pointed out it often results in you becoming a victim too.

“I did once and was coward punched, knocked out cold in a packed train and no one helped me. I’m 155cm tall. Police reckon there was no footage. We’re not safe,” she said.

“I’ve experienced it from an older man, getting his rocks off rubbing against me, I called him out in the crowd at a bus stop only for the man’s son to then threaten me,” another shared.

Melbourne psychologist Carly Dober said the 'not all men' argument ‘can be deadly and corrosive to society’. Picture: Supplied

One of the most frustrating responses to the incident were from men, who accused me of sweeping stereotypes by writing “not all men” under my video – but as Australian psychologist Carly Dober explained, this is an extremely harmful narrative.

“The phrase first appeared in the mid-2000s as a general defence of men. It was used as a catchphrase among men’s rights activists (MRAs) in response to online discussions of misogyny or sexual abuse which they saw as blaming all men as perpetrators,” Ms Dober, who works at Melbourne’s Enriching Lives Psychology clinic, told news.com.au.

“It shuts down an important conversation that women are trying to have. People have never stated that all men are harmful and cause harm, however a disproportionate amount of abuse crimes and harms against women are enacted by men.”

She explained that important discussions surrounding womens issues will often get “derailed when the ‘not all men’ line is offered up, often without any kind of listening or structural analysis”.

“It’s uneducated and disingenuous, and serves as a cheap ‘gotcha!’ at its worst.”

The psychology expert said it would be better as ‘why so many men?’ as not believing or trusting in women “can be deadly and corrosive to society”.

“Women are generally believed to be more emotional than men, and many men interpret this to mean women are ‘hysterical, difficult, dramatic, liars and are not to be trusted’,” Ms Dober added.

“But women are often the canary in the coal mine. They can be the first to come forward about a particular person, about particular behaviours, or about real dangers in society. When women aren’t believed and are unsupported, unnecessary harm continues to occur.”

Others in the comments section agreed with Ms Dober’s analysis, with one writing: “It’s not all men, but it’s ALWAYS a man. We all remember that moment as a girl, the first time we didn’t feel safe around men.”

What this experience has highlighted is that it is undeniably soul destroying being a woman at times.

As one woman summed it up, “We just are not safe. Anywhere. I long for a day when we don’t feel so exposed. It’s just a horrible existence.”

Being able to catch a train is such a basic human need, so why does it feel like an almost impossible feat for so many Aussie women?

Originally published as Shocking act on Sydney train exposes horrifying Aussie truth