Shari Bowman: How Heyfield mum is empowering other sexual assault survivors
At eight Shari was the victim of harrowing sexual abuse at the hands of a man she thought she could trust. Now at 24 the Gippsland mum is sharing her story to give power to every silent survivor.
Bass Coast News
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Shari Bowman sits in the courtroom face-to-face with the paedophile who stole her childhood.
He has the same white hair and beard that has haunted her since she was eight-years-old.
But the power and authority that once crippled her has disappeared.
On this day, July 7 in Melbourne’s County Court, the 76-year-old is not the authoritative man who brutally stole the innocence of a little girl.
He is old and frail and has been sentenced — mostly likely — to die in jail.
Finally Ms Bowman, 24 from Heyfield in Gippsland, has taken back the life he took from her all those years ago.
She’s found her voice, and she’s never felt more empowered.
“Seeing him be taken off out the back door and having the judge really validate what happened to me was incredible,” she said.
Les White of Leongatha was sentenced to 11 years jail after he was found guilty of a string of sexual abuse charges against a minor.
Judge Liz Gaynor said he acted with “monstrous selfishness” that was degrading and callous.
She said he acted with “classic, predatory, pedophilic” behaviour exploiting a vulnerable little girl.
“You saw her quite clearly as an object for the satisfaction of your own perverted sexual lusts,” she said.
White first sexually assaulted Ms Bowman when she was eight but the horrific rapes continued for years.
Born into a religious family, Ms Bowman thought she was going to hell because of what her attacker did.
She said her dreams of being a nun were shattered because of the selfishness of a man who lured her and her family into a false sense of security.
“I wanted to be a nun but felt I couldn’t because of what he did,” she said.
“When the judge sentenced him it was like all those fears I had were finally no longer an issue.”
The mother-of-two said White was once a family friend who exploited their financial status to get close to her and her brother Kody.
“We didn’t have a lot of money growing up so we played in parks and climbed trees to entertain ourselves,” she said.
“All of my experiences were filled with playing outdoors with friends until Les turned up.”
When White would visit, he would give Ms Bowman and her brother lollies and chocolates.
He took them to swimming pools, Luna Park, the Traralgon and Melbourne shows, festivals, tractor pulls — anything that he could use to earn Ms Bowman’s trust.
When he had it, he abused it to the worst degree.
On one occasion she was on his shoulders when she felt his hand touch her inappropriately.
She asked to be put down but he said no because she wasn’t wearing any shoes.
The abuse was relentless.
He encouraged her to kiss and rub his genitalia so that when she learnt about sexually transmitted diseases in school she feared she had one.
On a separate occasion he forced an object inside her.
She didn’t speak of the attacks because her abuser told her bad things would happen if she did.
Ms Bowman now suffers from post traumatic stress disorder, acute anxiety and major depressive disorder.
She is incapable of working or studying which is why she is raising money for a psychiatric service dog who she hopes could help give her the normal life most of her peers take for granted.
“I have support workers who take me places if I need to go shopping but other than that I don’t leave my house,” she said.
“If I’m able to get a service dog it will open up a lot of doors and hopefully I’ll be able to leave my house and actually do things with my life.”
Assistance Dogs Australia are the only placing certified service dogs with police, military or firefighters suffering from PTSD.
Ms Bowman said without one, her future was looking “pretty bleak”.
“It would give me a chance of freedom,” she said.
“I would be able to do things with my children that I wouldn’t normally be able to do like go to the movies or bowling.”
Ms Bowman said if it wasn’t for her children — five-year-old son Yugi and one-year-old daughter Raven — she would have struggled to survive.
“They mean everything to me,” Ms Bowman said.
“There aren’t any words to describe how important they are to me and how fiercely I need to protect them.”
Ms Bowman said she wished her attacker a lifetime of regret and would continue to campaign for sexual assault survivors.
“I hope every day he is locked up, he thinks about the damage he has done,” she said.
“After getting out of court, I didn’t want to be quiet about (the abuse).
“I wanted other victims to feel comfortable going through the court process.
“I thought I could really help others if they knew what to expect from the process of going to the police and court.”
Ms Bowman also urged other survivors to not be afraid.
“Someone will believe you,” she said.
“It’s time to take your power back.”
Donate to Ms Bowman’s GoFundMe here.
If you or someone you know is a victim of sexual assault contact 1800RESPECT or 1800 737 732.
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