‘I’ll never get over it’: Sam’s grief over wife’s death

Sam Newman has shared what life is like after the shock death of his wife Amanda, revealing he misses “everything about her”.

TV and footy legend Sam Newman has spoken of his grief and deep sadness at the passing of his wife, Amanda.

Newman, 75, returned to his Docklands apartment on the evening of May 1 and discovered Amanda collapsed in the corridor outside their bedroom.

He attempted CPR for 20 minutes before the ambulance arrived and it was determined she had passed away.

Six weeks later he said he was still coming to terms with Amanda’s death, which he was told was caused by an aneurysm, just six months after they had wed.

“I miss everything about her,” Newman said, describing the past weeks as “surreal” and “very tough”.

Amanda Brown and Sam Newman on holiday. Picture: Instagram

“But I am getting on with it, there is no alternative, is there?

“It feels surreal. It is absolutely a surreal feeling.

“If you could transport yourself back six weeks and you had this hypothetical conversation with someone they would say, ‘What the hell are you talking about?’

“And now that hypothetical conversion is just a reality.

“I’ll never get over that night.”

Newman and Amanda were together for 20 years before they married in a surprise, private ceremony on 50th birthday in November 2020.

“I am so delighted that I decided to do that because that made her really happy and I couldn’t think of a better 50th birthday present to give her because she was so over the moon about it,” Newman said.

“It was a good present because she never ever suggested it, hinted at it, asked me about it, ever.

Sam Newman and his wife Amanda on their wedding day in November 2020. Picture: Supplied.

“She was too smart to ever put any pressure on any part of our relationship.

“I know it was a huge surprise to her. I feel grateful I did that.

“A greater presence must have said, ‘I think you should do this,’ other than me just thinking of it.

“Maybe someone greater than us knew what might happen.

“I just feel really sad for Amanda that she couldn’t enjoy the rest of what she was looking forward to and that, of course, goes for me as well.”

Newman said he was adjusting to being alone for the first time in his life with small tasks reminding him of his wife’s absence daily.

“When you are with someone you rely on them for certain things and they rely on you for certain things and when they cease not to be, you have to deal with the things you used to rely on from your partner,” he said.

Sam Newman and Amanda Brown in 2013. Picture: Supplied

“So simple things like, I am not talking about housework or cooking we used to share all that, I am talking about simple things like me being technologically inept at modern social media, computers, and downloading stuff on the television, dealing with power companies, the car registration and bills.

“I did not do any of that and Amanda used to enjoy doing that and I used to enjoy doing things for her, so that has been a very steep and quick learning curve.

“There are plenty of things you think on a daily basis, ‘wow, now how do I do that? How do I do this?’.”

Newman is in the process of moving out of the home he shared with Amanda into another apartment in the Dockland that she designed and decorated before her death.

“We had already decided to downsize a little,” Newman said.

“We had bought a smaller place and Amanda had designed it and bought all the furniture for it.

Sam Newman and Amanda Brown. Picture: Supplied.

“So in one way that is a good legacy and when I move into that I will see this was the fruits of her insight and work. She designed the whole thing.”

Newman said he wanted to make it clear he was no different from anyone else in experiencing the loss of a partner.

“There are plenty of people my age, 75, that have lost partners or friends. It does not matter what the circumstances are, it is still a heartbreak,” he said.

“Everyone walking around on this planet faces hardship and adversity and hard times, for whatever reason, on a daily basis.

“I have found it pretty tough. I am glad I found it tough. I would have expected it to be tough and it has been.

Sam Newman has told of his deep grief at the passing of his wife Amanda. Picture: Nicole Cleary

“I am not feeling sorry for myself and I don’t want people to feel sorry for me.”

Newman said he was grateful for the support of his close friends and family, particularly his adored four granddaughters.

“I have some great friends, great family and my granddaughters, so that is all you can really ask for I suppose,” he said.

“You take things for granted when everything is going well and when you face a bit of a hurdle in life, whatever that hurdle is, it puts it starkly in perspective.

“Those four little girls, who are my granddaughters, are just a joy and I have come to appreciate that, not that I did not appreciate it before, but I have come to appreciate it more because they are the future.”

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