‘I thought...I was going to die: Stephen Quartermain’s AFL career

One of AFL’s most recognised voices, Stephen Quartermain, has spilled stories from the vault of his colourful career, including the player who gave him dating tips and the day he thought he might die.

Footy tragic Steve Quartermain wore his heart on his sleeve, telling of his love of AFL and the many colourful moments he has enjoyed immersed in the sport.

The Channel 10 sports presenter shared his deep affection for the game at Ross Stevenson’s Love Letter To Footy Lunch last week which supported the Rule Prostate Cancer organisation.

Quartermain’s ambition to play footy at the highest level ended as a 15-year-old after he was invited to Windy Hill to train with the Essendon scholarship squad.

“I was the second tallest there and I was asked to ruck against the other tall guy,” Quartermain recalled.

“His name was Justin Madden. My budding VFL career was over in 20 minutes.”

Steve Quartermain. Picture: Julie Kiriacoudis

His career in footy media had its own memorable moments including him learning the hard way not to be overly familiar with players post game.

“I accidentally squirrel gripped Roger Merrett in the Essendon rooms when I mistook him for my Ringwood mate Paul Salmon,” he said.

“I actually thought that day I was going to die.”

For Quartermain other off-field moments to remember included being invited into the cockpit of an Ansett flight as he and Carlton's David Rhys-Jones travelled back from Perth to Melbourne following a State of Origin match.

“Rhysey was well refreshed having never been to bed and was offered the controls by the pilot and banked it hard left. We all cacked our dacks not in a good way,” he said.

He shared a beer with Dipper and INXS superstar Michael Hutchence in a hotel opposite the Chevron at 4am after the 1986 grand final, modelled in an Elton John AIDS Foundation fundraiser with Stephen Silvagni where he shared change rooms with the likes of Claudia Schiffer and Helena Christensen, called grand finals and hosted Brownlow Medal counts.

Stephen Quartermain had to learn not to be overly familiar with players after matches. Picture: Supplied

He also recalled “having a beer with Wayne Carey in his first season and encouraging him to accept an invitation to get on a bus full of women at a hens night” and “receiving dating tips from Trevor Barker, getting blonde tips with Trevor Barker, (and) sharing a house with Dermott Brereton – there are a couple of books I will never write.”

He even had fried rice thrown on him in the Triple M commentary box by AFL legend Jason Dunstall.

“Sadly, I am no longer involved as a commentator, who knows what the future holds,” Quartermain said.

“I would love to get back in some shape or form but as my dear old mum once said it is better to have loved and lost than never loved at all. Thank you football, I truly do love you.”

Please, get this man back into a commentary box!