OPINION: What's so bad about break-up sex anyway?

I’VE heard it said by some that the best way to get over someone, is to get under someone else.

I'VE heard it said by some that the best way to get over someone, is to get under someone else.

But while it's true that sex can boost your confidence and remind you that there are other people out there, it's not always the case that getting under (or over, or next to, or in front of) someone else will necessarily make you feel better.

There's also another kind of "post break-up sex" we often encounter - And that's with our ex-partner (or soon to be ex). If you were to ever ask your friend if break-up sex is a good idea, chances are, they'll jump down your throat and tell you that you're mad for even thinking it.

But is it really such a bad idea?

Do all couples just break up in the heat of the moment and walk away from each other, never ever wishing they could have shared a moment of intimacy one last time, for old time's sake? Is something wrong with you for even thinking it?

Really, why on earth is break-up sex bad? Sometimes, break-up sex just happens out of the blue. You don't plan to have it, you don't think it, you're sitting together one moment, and before both of you know it, you're in bed having the wildest sex of your relationship.

Have you ever kissed a lover one last time before saying goodbye? Chances are that last goodbye kiss that's so full of passion, hunger and love, felt really good, didn't it?

Break-up sex isn't all bad - but are you emotionally mature enough to differentiate between break-up sex, and make-up sex? Because there's a big difference!

The most confusing part about break-up sex is the fact that it will often make you wonder if both of you should just get back together.

The break-up sex feels so good and it's so overwhelming and intense. It often brings all the emotions of your relationship and squeezes it into a few hours where both of you make love to each other one last time. Can you really handle all that emotion?

And that's not it - if you're not emotionally prepared to let your lover go, it may even delay the healing process. If you do have break-up sex with your lover, you need to remember that this isn't a romantic reconciliation - it's all about the relationship going down in a blaze of glory.

There's a lot of bad in break-up sex, but it's not all bad. Every relationship is different and every lover wants to end things in a different way. A romantic relationship thrives on two aspects, emotional intimacy and sexual intimacy.

And if you had to say goodbye to your lover forever, what better way to say it, and get closure, than by experiencing emotional and sexual intimacy, and moving on forever, having said goodbye to each other one last time, as lovers? But do it only if you're completely ready to let go of them.

Most people misunderstand the idea of break-up sex and use it to manipulate their lover into staying back in the relationship by begging and pleading with them. You have to remember that you can't hold someone back, or force them to love you if they choose not to.

Break-up sex can be a great way to say goodbye, if you're emotionally mature.

Originally published as OPINION: What's so bad about break-up sex anyway?