Anna Kendrick has opened up about her 7-year-long abusive relationship

The signs can be hard to recognise

Anna Kendrick has opened up about her experience surviving a seven-year-long abusive relationship.

Actress Anna Kendrick, who has starred in movies including A Simple Favor, Pitch Perfect and recently, Woman of the Hour, has opened up about the details of a seven-year abusive relationship, in a new episode of the Call Her Daddypodcast.

Talking to host Alex Cooper, Kendrick said it took her some time to realise that what she had been living through was abuse – and spoke openly about the confusing nature of the ordeal. 

The struggle to identify emotional abuse

Like many other women, Kendrick didn’t realise she was a victim of domestic abuse as she couldn’t relate to typical stories of violence. 

"I was, like, reading all the articles and going, 'This doesn't look... like, some of it looks like how they're describing it, but not completely," she told Cooper.

She claimed she struggled to identify what was happening to her as it ‘didn’t follow the traditional pattern’ of abuse.

“It came out of absolutely nowhere”, she said, “it's like a frog in boiling water thing where it started slow".

Anna Kendrick struggled to identify what was happening to her as it ‘didn’t follow the traditional pattern’ of abuse. Image: Getty.

The 39-year-old has not named the ex she is referring to, but gave insight into the relationship. 

“He told me one day I was terrorizing him because I was just crying because I couldn't pretend that things were fine anymore, and I just started crying. And he screamed in my face, 'You're terrorizing me.' But it was truly from the place of a person who believed that they were being terrorized”, she recalled.

After being made to feel like the antagoniser, Kendrick grew fearful of her partner.

Speaking to Dax Shepard on his Armchair Expert podcast last year, Kendrick recalled thinking “I can't bring up the fact that I'm scared of you because when I do, you get really scary."

The 39 year old has not named the ex she is referring to, but gave insight into the relationship. Image: Getty.

Self-blame

The star told Cooper she initially blamed herself for their deteriorating relationship, saying she thought “If one of us is crazy, it must be me”.

"I was in a situation where I loved and trusted this person more than I trusted myself. So when that person is telling you that you have a distorted sense of reality and that you are impossible and that all the stuff that you think is going on is not going on, your life gets really confusing really quickly”, she said.

Kendrick took it on herself to try to repair the relationship, saying “I turned my life completely upside down trying to fix whatever was wrong with me.”

The star opens up about abusive relationship. Image: Getty.

Therapy

The pair enlisted a couples therapist, but even the professional didn’t immediately recognise the signs of abuse. 

The actress said she’s “had several sessions with (the therapist) in the last several years where he's apologized to me because I think he realized what was going on, like, right toward the end”.

She has credited therapy with helping her to realise what she was going through.

The pair enlisted a couples therapist, but even the professional didn’t immediately recognise the signs of abuse. Image: Getty.

After yelling during one session, Kendrick recalls emailing the therapist to apologise. He called her shortly after to say he was “so proud” of her for speaking out.

“It was very, very difficult to actually go, 'No, I think this is him. I think this is his stuff,' " the star told Cooper.

She recalled how it felt to finally acknowledge what she had been going through, saying “I was in a situation where, at the end, I had the unique experience of finding out that everything I thought was going on was in fact going on. So I had this kind of springboard for feeling and recovery that a lot of people don't get."

She has credited therapy with helping her to realise what she was going through. Image: Getty.

Alice, Darling

Shortly after the pair’s breakup, the actress starred in Alice, Darling, where she played a woman stuck in an emotionally abusive relationship.

She told Cooper she didn’t tell people she was making the movie at the time. 

"I had just gotten out of a relationship that was extremely similar to the movie," she said on the podcast, "and I didn't want anybody to tell me to not do it."

Anna Kendrick attended a screening of her film Alice, Darling. Image: Getty.

If you or someone you know needs help, please contact the National Sexual Assault, Domestic and Family Violence Counselling Service on 1800 RESPECT for 24/7 support.

In an emergency please call 000 .

If you or someone you know needs help, phone Lifeline on 13 11 14 or the 24-hour Suicide Call Back Service at 1300 659 467.  

Mental health professionals are available 24/7 at the beyondblue Support Service –  1300 22 46 36 or via beyondblue.org.au/get-support for online chat (3pm-12am AEST) or email response.

Originally published as Anna Kendrick has opened up about her 7-year-long abusive relationship