Jerry Seinfeld tells packed Qudos Bank Arena he’s ready to get the hell out of Australia

JERRY Seinfeld is ready to get the hell out of Australia. The popular comedian told his first of two Sydney shows last night that he’d enjoyed the past week, but he’s had enough.

• Jerry Seinfeld plays a packed Qudos Bank Arena

Jerry Seinfeld is ready to get the hell out of Australia.

The popular comedian told his first of two Sydney shows on Thursday night that he’d enjoyed the past week, but he’s had enough.

“We’ve been here a whole week, we’ve had the best time but I’ll be honest with you - at this point I have got to get the hell out of here,” he told the packed house at Qudos Bank Arena, which the funny man also took aim at.

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“I have always wanted to play the Qudos Bank Arena,” he said. “It’s one of those things you think about when you start off in show business: Carnegie Hall, Lincoln Centre, but what about the Qudos Bank Arena in Sydney - do you think I’ll ever get there?”

Wonder if those white sneakers were cleaned at the Mom and Pop Store? Jerry Seinfeld goes for stroll with a friend around Olympic Park. Picture: Mega

Of course Seinfeld was talking in jest, the comments part of a piece on how humans are always having to move on, never satisfied with their current situation.

Seinfeld could have come out on stage and knitted a jumper and those in the crowd would have gone wild with every stitch, such is the comedian’s cult status in this country.

It’s been 19 years since he last performed a show in Australia, but the undisputed master of observational comedy hasn’t lost his spark, although there were some parts that were just a little too familiar.

Sydney's Qudos Bank Arena

The show was split in two distinct halves with the first his ‘view on the outside world’, which consisted of his tried and tested ($880 million kind of tested) views on everyday life.

It’s the type of humour that turned his long-running sitcom into a comedy powerhouse, but can sometimes feel like it hasn’t progressed much from when Jerry, Elaine, George and Kramer signed off in the late 90s.

Explaining to the audience that they were only there to try a seat different to their own - and congratulating them for getting off their asses and actually doing something - the comedian said he was there merely as a prop for their distraction.

Comedian Jerry Seinfeld performs onstage

“My whole job is to slightly distract you while you enjoy sitting in a different chair (than home)”, he explained.

“This whole experience is a made-up, bogus, hyped up, not necessary special event.”

There were moments in the show where it felt as if he didn’t really want to alter the US version of his routine.

A humorous rant about the US Postal Service and the cost of stamps (they keep going up by pennies to try and bail it out of near-extinction) could easily have been translated to our own struggling Australia Post and was one of the few times the audience was a little quieter.

The second half was about the comedian’s own life and the trials and tribulations of being a married man and father.

Seinfeld’s Sydney shows are sold out.

Seinfeld finally tied the knot at the age of 45 - after an extended period where he “had some issues…which I was enjoying quite a bit as I recall” - and had three kids in the six years after that.

All that happened in those 19 years between gigs in Australia so the ‘second act’ had a freshness to it and the audience, while there was no shortage of laughter beforehand, seemed to pick up on this and the laughs became just a little bit louder.


Seinfeld doesn’t look his 63 years, but he has matured in his choice of wardrobe since he last graced our shores. Gone are the tight jeans and white sneakers, the iconic look that inspired a footwear revolution replaced with a smart black suit, blue tie and adult shoes.

Despite a couple of sub-Seinfeld moments, fans won’t be disappointed with the return of their comic idol.