‘She told me if I'm expecting a baby girl, she won't come to my baby shower’

“This person likes to try and control things they can't control, and then gets mad when things go differently…” 

It won’t be long until Julia* welcomes her second child into the family. 

She is due to give birth in late May, and she and her husband David* are preparing their home for the arrival of their second baby. 

With a three-year-old boy at home, they’re expecting to also welcome a bit of chaos. 

At the same time, David’s cousin Claire* is also pregnant and is due to give birth to her first child in August. 

While Anna and Luna aren’t exactly close, the pregnancies have forced them to get closer and discuss everything they’re experiencing. 

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Julia has been told to not invite her cousin-in-law to her baby shower if she's having a girl. Picture: iStock

Woman refuses to attend cousin’s baby shower if she’s having a girl

“It was during those conversations that she expressed wanting a baby girl,” Anna told Reddit. 

“She specifically said she couldn't see herself raising a boy.”

Claire’s dreams of having a baby girl, however, were squashed when she and her husband hosted a gender reveal party in March, where they learned they were expecting a son. 

“She was visibly disappointed after finding out the sex of her baby,” Julia said. “She threw on a fake smile during the actual reveal, but didn't keep it up for long.” 

During the party, Claire’s attitude started to sour; she was acting frustrated by the news, and appeared “cold and short” to anyone who tried to congratulate her. 

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While Julia doesn’t know if anyone knew about Claire’s wishes, it was pretty obvious by the end of the party exactly what she was thinking. 

“Since her party, she's been less excited about her pregnancy,” Julia said 

“We've been speaking less, because she doesn't even want to talk about her baby anymore.”

Julia has been sympathetic to her cousin-in-law’s disappointment in her baby’s sex, but things changed when Claire approached her a few weeks after the gender reveal party. 

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Julia and her husband David know they’re having a girl, but they have decided to keep it a secret until baby is born. Even David’s parents have been left in the dark. 

But that hasn’t stopped Claire, who hasn’t stopped bombarding Julia about her pregnancy. 

“A couple [of] days ago, Claire called to ask about my baby's gender,” Julia wrote. “She said that if I'm expecting a girl, she won't come to the baby shower.” 

Shocked and offended, Julia asked why Claire was feeling this way. 

“She said she's still ‘mourning her daughter’, and doesn't want to be reminded that she's not having a girl,” Julia shared. 

“She also said that since she'd shared her reveal with the family, it was only fair I told her.”

Julia informed her that no one would know the gender until baby was born, and Claire was no exception. Instead, she told Claire she didn’t have to attend the baby shower if she felt uncomfortable. 

“Claire continued to pressure me to tell her, but I stood my ground,” Julia wrote. 

“After some back-and-forth, she told me I was being inconsiderate, as I knew how devastated she'd been. She said she deserved to know if I was about to ‘rub my happiness in her face.’”

And just like that, Julia’s fuse ran out. 

“I told Claire that if having a boy was that awful to her, she shouldn't have thrown herself a gender reveal in the first place,” the angry woman wrote. “I said that she could stop celebrating her pregnancy if she wanted to, but she can't dictate what I do about mine.”

In response, Claire told David’s parents that Julia was “kicking her out of the baby shower”, resulting in an ear-bashing from her in-laws. 

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“Claire should’ve gotten a puppy”

Many of the Redditors noted that gender disappointment was an understandable feeling, but Claire's reaction was completely out of order. 

“This person likes to try and control things they can't control and then gets mad when things go differently,” read a comment. 

“If Claire couldn’t cope with having a boy, she should have skipped having children altogether,” another agreed. “How shallow and vacuous of her.”

“Having a reveal was a stupid idea if she felt strongly either way,” said a woman. 

“I feel Claire shouldn't have chosen to have a child knowing that she only wants a girl,” someone wrote. 

“I'm sure she will love the child when it is born, but now everyone knows she doesn’t want him.” 

Others warned Julia of the backlash that would likely occur when Claire finds out her baby’s gender.

“Oh boy is she going to flip when she finds out you are having a girl,” read a comment. “Best to distance yourself as much as possible.”

“Claire should have gotten a puppy,” said another.  

*Names have been changed

Originally published as ‘She told me if I'm expecting a baby girl, she won't come to my baby shower’