Which cabins are noisiest? 20 of the big questions in cruising answered

Where are the noisiest cabins on a cruise ship?

You’ll have some level of background noise in any cabin created by wind, the ship’s movement, air-conditioners and engines. This is affected by the quality of the ship’s soundproofing and cabin design. Party and family ships are obviously noisier than tranquil or adults-only vessels.

If you’re seeking peace and quiet, avoid party ships like those with Virgin Voyages.

Luxury ships are relatively quiet, so you’ll particularly want to choose your cabin wisely on bigger budget ships.

If you’re a light sleeper, avoid cabins close to lifts and stairwells where guests congregate and chat, often late at night. The lifts may chime or have doors that rattle open.

You shouldn’t choose a cabin that is either directly above or below venues that tend to produce noise, especially if open late. That includes casinos, bars, nightclubs, theatres and (if there are any) all-night restaurants.

Avoid cabins directly below the pool deck, where late-night revellers might linger for loud alcohol-fuelled conversations. You might be awakened early by the drag of loungers across the deck as crew set up for the day.

Finally, you don’t want to be near the anchors that rattle out early in the morning in tender ports, which might be most ports on an expedition cruise, so avoid cabins on lower decks towards the front of the ship.

What should I pack for a cruise?

One of the pleasures of cruising is that you only have to pack once, and won’t see the inside of your suitcase again until the end of the voyage.

Most cruise lines permit one suitcase per passenger, and cabin storage space is limited, so reign in any urge towards excess, especially if your ship has a self-service laundry. If you’re a shopper, bring a soft folding bag with you.

You’ll need a day pack for arrival and departure days to hold valuables and necessities such as medicines, because you’ll be separated from your luggage for a while.

Cruise ships are increasingly informal, and any formal or “elegant” evenings are confined to certain restaurants, so smart casual will suffice unless you want to participate.

Think about how you can mix and match clothing to create new looks without packing too much. For example, a variety of blouses might be matched to a single skirt, or accessories changed to create a different vibe.

Think particularly about what shoes will match the most changes of clothes, since multiple pairs of shoes take up awkward suitcase space.

Clothes apart, don’t forget a phone charger and adaptor. You aren’t allowed to bring alcohol, candles and other flammable items or electrical devices such as hair dryers on board.

Do cruise ships really have a brig?

Small luxury and expedition ships are unlikely to have a brig, but larger ships often do. A brig is a ship’s prison: the term is derived from brigantine, a type of two-masted sailing ship often used in the past to house naval and military prisoners.

A brig or holding cell doesn’t have bars like a stereotypical jail cell. It will be a bare-bones cabin without windows on a lower-level crew area of the ship. It will likely contain no more than a single bed and toilet facilities. The walls may be padded.

Ship security personnel have the authority to intervene if they see unruly, inappropriate or criminal behaviour, and to confine those involved. At least some security staff will have former police or military law-enforcement training.

It is, however, the captain who ultimately decides whether someone is confined. You’d probably have to commit murder, drug trafficking or sexual assault to end up in the brig.

Those who are drunk and disorderly, who get into a physical fight, violate safety regulations or who commit petty theft will likely be confined to their own cabins, perhaps with a security guard stationed outside. They’ll be handed over to local authorities at the next port.

Do cruise ships still have dress codes?

Passengers dress up for gala evenings on board Cunard’s cruise ships.

Every cruise line has dress codes, although they’re sometimes haphazardly enforced. You’ll find them outlined on company websites. Daily dress codes will be listed in your print newsletter or cruise app.

The general rule is that, in restaurants and lounges in the evenings, jeans, shorts, swimwear, collarless T-shirts, sneakers and toeless shoes are frowned upon. That may apply at other times in certain places on upmarket ships.

Other than that, dress codes on cruise ships have become increasingly relaxed and on no ship is formal attire an absolute requirement. Cruises do have formal nights but, if that isn’t your thing, dress codes won’t apply ship wide.

Formal means an evening gown (increasingly rare) or cocktail dress for women and a tuxedo or suit and tie for men. Some budget lines offer tuxedo rentals.

Remember that for some people the captain’s dinner, formal nights and speciality restaurant dining are opportunities to dress up and feel a sense of occasion. Don’t be the party pooper who rocks up in crumpled clothes, even if you’re allowed to.

Smart casual will otherwise suffice. Men may want to bring a jacket for specialty restaurants. Budget and premium ships sometimes have theme nights so check ahead and bring a costume to enjoy the fun.

Do I need a passport to cruise?

Just like travelling by airplane, you’ll need a passport if your cruise starts or finishes overseas, or visits any overseas ports. It should have at least six months validity and match the name on your cruise documents.

You don’t need a passport for domestic cruises that start, finish and sail wholly within Australia, but you can use one if you wish.

You’ll otherwise need a government-issued photo ID, although on some cruise lines children under 18 years old can use a Medicare card. A driver’s licence is your best option.

Anyone visiting from overseas who takes a domestic cruise here in Australia will have to use a passport to board the ship. An overseas driver’s licence or other ID won’t pass muster.

Similar rules apply to other citizens in other destinations. For example, Americans who cruise wholly within the United States don’t need a passport, but will need both a government-issued photo and a state-certified birth certificate.

Don’t forget that, if you cruise abroad, you might need visas, which may be available on arrival or might have to be obtained in advance. You may need blank pages in your passport. If you don’t have a visa, you won’t be allowed to disembark.

What do maritime pilots do?

One of the entertainments of arriving or departing from port is watching the pilot boat nudging the moving cruise ship and the pilot leaping through an open shell door in the hull, or onto a rope ladder to a deck.

A pilot boat will also have a coxswain or skipper who decides whether conditions are safe to set out and to transfer the pilot, and a deckhand to assist the pilot when on deck and transferring between vessels, which is a dangerous – and indeed sometimes fatal – manoeuvre.

The pilot is an expert on a particular harbour or waterway and is there to assist the captain and navigational crew to guide the ship safely, usually in or out of port, but sometimes at sea too, such as through the Great Barrier Reef or Alaskan icebergs.

Pilots are very familiar not just with the local coastline, shoals, islands, docks, buoys or any other physical impediment but also changing tides, currents and wind conditions.

Pilots are mandatory in nearly every port and communication between plot and crew is in English.

The pilot will suggest course and speed but, contrary to common assumption, the ship’s captain ultimately retains command of the vessel and has responsibility for its safety.

What is a lido deck?

The lido or, more commonly these days, pool deck on board Royal Caribbean’s Anthem of the Seas.

The lido deck on a cruise ship is the deck on which you’ll find the main swimming pool and hot tubs, and possibly water slides, surrounded by deck chairs or loungers. The term pool deck is increasingly used.

You’ll likely also find a bar, an ice-cream outlet, and an informal eatery serving burgers, pizzas, salads and the like.

The term lido was first used to refer to a sandbank or barrier island that separates the sea from a lagoon, and comes from the name of a barrier island with a bathing beach near Venice.

The word was first used in English in the 1860s but became more widespread in the early twentieth century to refer to any fashionable beach resort. In British English, it now tends to refer to a public outdoor swimming pool, especially if part of a beach or riverbank.

On big budget cruise ships, lido decks can be very lively places hosting sail-away parties, live bands and DJs, buffet meals, outdoor movie screenings and other events from belly-flop contests to hairy chest competitions. They’re often seen as the hub of the ship.

On small luxury vessels lido decks are more often quiet areas for sunbathing, sedate splashes and cocktails.

What’s the story with port and starboard?

You might think left and right would suffice on a ship, but remember not everybody will be facing towards the front. Confusion might arise for those looking backwards.

The words port and starboard don’t mean the same thing as left and right. They mean left and right when facing towards the front of a ship, which avoids ambiguity.

In the bad old days, the direction of a boat or small ship was controlled by a steering oar. As most sailors were right-handed, the steering oar was placed to the right of the boat’s stern.

The right-hand side was soon referred to as the steering side, or in Old English “steor” (steer) and “bord” (side).

The steering oar got in the way when tying up at a quay, so the left was called larboard or the loading side. But as larboard and starboard sound much the same, port side came into more frequent use from the 1540s.

The terms port and starboard are also used on aircraft and spacecraft. Ship and aircraft navigation lights are red for port and green for starboard.

If you get confused, the easy way to orient yourself is to remember that port and left both contain four letters.

Do cruise ships still have gentlemen hosts?

Some do. They may also be called dance hosts or ambassador hosts, and they’re there to make solo guests feel included and entertained.

Hosts are selected for their social skills, impeccable manners and ability to tango and salsa. They’re usually retirees with professional backgrounds and wide-ranging small talk.

While hosts might be most readily seen on the dance floor, you’ll also spot them conversing in lounges and cocktail bars and participating in games such as trivia or cards. They may escort guests on shore excursions.

Hosts also preside over restaurant tables where seating is organised for solo travellers looking for company. Solo guests may receive an invitation, or can request to be seated at a solo table.

Although singles are the priority, feel free to talk to a gentleman host, or take a spin on the dancefloor with him if your husband or partner has two left feet.

The host’s attention shouldn’t be monopolised. Indeed, his remit is to mix and mingle within strict guidelines.

Hosts were once a cruise staple, but these days you’ll only find them on a few premium and luxury lines – Crystal Cruises, Cunard, Regent Seven Seas and Silversea – and even then, maybe only on longer voyages.

What can cruise-ship doctors do for me?

Don’t assume that ship’s doctors merely hand out indigestion and seasickness tablets. They can and regularly do save passengers’ lives. On-board doctors and nurses have several years of emergency-room experience and training in advanced cardiac and trauma life support, as well as in general medical experience.

Medical centres on the largest cruise ships are akin to infirmaries, and are surprisingly sophisticated. They include an emergency room, intensive-care unit (ICU), x-ray and blood-testing facilities and a pharmacy. There may be up to nine medical staff, with some available 24 hours.

The medical centre caters to the regular health issues of passengers and particularly crew, who may be on board for nine months at a time. Respiratory infections, gastrointestinal illness, seasickness and accidental injury are the most frequently treated conditions.

The main aim in an emergency is to perform resuscitation, undertake minor surgery or stabilise patients before they’re evacuated to a hospital, which in extreme circumstances, may be by helicopter.

A visit to the ship’s doctor can be an expensive business, billed to your cabin and settled on disembarkation. Be aware that regular travel insurance often doesn’t cover cruising, for which an additional premium is charged. There may also be a premium for remote locations such as Antarctica.

What is a flag of convenience?

Under international law, a ship must be registered in and subject to the laws of a particular country, but not necessarily the same country in which the company that owns the ship is incorporated.

Cruise ships are often registered in countries that have fewer environmental, safety and regulatory requirements, lower taxes, or less stringent laws pertaining to workers’ wages and working conditions. In short, flags of convenience lower operating costs.

The practice began in the 1920 under Prohibition in the US, when American cruise ships were banned from serving alcohol. The solution was to flag ships in Panama. Companies soon discovered Panama’s other, less onerous regulations.

For most cruise passengers, none of this mattered until the pandemic, when the US refused docking to foreign-flagged vessels, even though they home-ported in Florida and carried mainly American passengers.

Cruise ships are often perceived as American, but technically few are. The place where the ship is flagged is marked on the hull in smaller lettering under the ship’s name. Most commonly, this will be the Bahamas, Liberia, Malta, the Marshall Islands or Panama. The Trump administration has recently complained about this practice and threatened a crackdown in order to have the cruise lines pay tax in the US.

Some cruise companies retain ship registry in their country of origin, notably Coral Expeditions (Australia), Holland America Line (Netherlands) and Viking Cruises (Norway).

What can you tell me about cruise-ship lifeboats?

Lifeboats, which on cruise ships are painted orange or yellow, are designed for evacuation and survival at sea. They’re mandated in Safety of Life at Sea (SOLAS) regulations developed after the sinking of the Titanic in 1912.

SOLAS has quite a list of what needs to be carried on lifeboats, starting with navigational and communications equipment, an illuminated compass, searchlight, fire extinguishers, oars, tools to fix the engine, and fuel to last 24 hours.

Lifeboats are also required to carry equipment for attracting attention, including smoke signals, flares and a whistle.

Each passenger requires a life jacket, three litres of water and 2390 calories of food rations. Clearly in modern times the expectation is that rescuers will arrive relatively quickly, although lifeboats must also carry fishing gear.

The ride is likely to be unpleasant. Other requirements are two sick bags and 48 hours of seasickness medication per person. There are no toilet facilities.

Only 75 per cent of those on board are required to fit into lifeboats. The remaining 25 per cent, likely to be all crew, have to use inflatable life rafts stored in the canisters you might see on deck, which inflate when high-pressure gas is activated.

Can you smoke on cruise ships?

The Connoisseur’s Corner cigar lounge on board Silversea’s Silver Nova.

The short answer is yes, but areas in which you’re allowed to smoke are strictly regulated. Rules apply to e-cigarettes too.

Non-smokers are unlikely to be bothered by cigarette smoke except in passing. You’re unlikely to fully enjoy a cruise ship if you’re a heavy smoker.

You won’t be able to smoke in your cabin, in restaurants, in the theatre or (particularly on smaller luxury ships) in bars and lounges.

Some of the big budget ships may have corners of bars and the casino where smoking is allowed, but only in certain destinations – and that doesn’t include Australia and New Zealand.

An exception will be the cigar lounges of some ships from lines such as Crystal, Cunard, MSC, NCL, Princess, Regent Seven Seas and Silversea.

You can light up in certain designated (quite limited) areas of a sheltered deck and usually a corner of the pool deck. You can’t do so on your cabin balcony because wind and cigarettes create a fire hazard. To my knowledge only Costa Cruises makes an exception.

Violations will result in a fine and a cleaning fee, and you may be disembarked. Finally, you cannot smoke marijuana on any cruise ship, even with a medical marijuana card.

Who has jurisdiction on a cruise ship?

Good question, difficult answer. Maritime law is notoriously convoluted and confusing.

If the ship is sailing in internal or territorial waters, which extend 12 nautical miles or 22 kilometres out to sea, then that country’s laws apply. A ship sailing out of Sydney Harbour, for example, is governed by NSW and Australian law.

This is the reason why, in some destinations, duty-free shops or the casino don’t open until the ship is well out to sea.

A contiguous zone extends another 12 nautical miles beyond territorial waters, where local enforcement agencies may, for example, still have the right to board and search a ship.

Beyond that, your cruise ship is in international waters or on the high seas. Now the laws of the country of its registry apply, which is often the Bahamas, Liberia, Malta, the Marshall Islands or Panama.

Meanwhile, if you have a consumer dispute, your cruise contract indicates which laws apply. It might inform you that “This contract is governed by the laws in force in the State of Florida”, for example.

Depending on where and how you booked and whether the cruise line operates in Australia, however, you may have rights under Australian Consumer Law. Hope that has cleared everything up.

Can I cruise away from the east-coast wave?

The south-east corner of mainland Australia, Tasmania and Queensland are our most frequented cruise destinations, but you can cruise anywhere on the Australian coast – or all of it, in the case of circumnavigations.

The biggest expedition destination is the Kimberley, although, despite its remoteness, it’s arguably become well-sailed thanks to the boom in companies operating there – including APT, Coral Expeditions, Ponant, Scenic, Seabourn, Silversea and Travelmarvel.

Further south lies the Coral Coast, with destinations such as Shark Bay and the Houtman Abrolhos Islands, visited by APT, Coral Expeditions and True North. The latter two also operate cruises in South Australia that visit wildlife-rich destinations such as the Eyre Peninsula, Coffin Bay National Park and the Pearson and Gambier islands.

You can still get to alternative destinations in places visited by big ships. APT, Aurora Expeditions, Coral Expeditions, On Board, Ponant and World Expedition sail wilderness areas Port Davey and Bathurst Harbour in south-west Tasmania, and along the east coast.

Meanwhile, in Queensland, you can get out to less-frequently visited islands and reefs on the Great Barrier Reef, and to Cape York and islands of the Torres Strait with the likes of Coral Expeditions, Heritage Expeditions, Scenic and True North.

What’s the difference between ocean and river cruising?

APT’s MS Estrela cruising the Douro River, Portugal.

Seems like an obvious question but, if you’ve tried one and are wondering whether you’d like the other, here’s what to consider.

River cruising won’t supply you with a party atmosphere, big Broadway-style shows, water parks and rides, a wide choice of dining venues, or much entertainment or amenities. Expect lectures, tinkling pianos, a tiny swimming pool or hot tub, spa and fitness rooms, but not much more.

For these reasons, river cruises don’t suit children. Only a handful of vessels from Adventures by Disney, A-Rosa, Tauck and Uniworld operate family-friendly cruises.

River ships usually carry about 200 passengers, some ocean ships almost 7000. You can’t be anonymous on a river ship, as you share small lounge spaces and dining tables. This can be a plus for some, a downside for others.

Ocean cruises on big budget ships are cheaper than river cruises, but the latter are generally all- inclusive. Once on board, you won’t pay extra for excursions, Wi-Fi, speciality meals and gratuities.

River cruises rarely have the equivalent of days at sea, and are very destination-oriented. You’ll spend more time in ports. When you sail, you can enjoy constantly passing scenery rather than the open ocean – and have no worries about seasickness.

Can I choose a particular cabin when booking?

A stateroom on Celebrity Edge.

Unlike hotels, most cruise ships will allow you to choose your own cabin (or, as the industry likes to call them these days, staterooms) from what is available at the time of booking.

If you’re booking online, you’ll be asked to select a deck level and ship section first, such as mid-ship or aft. Then you’ll be directed to a deck plan that shows available cabins, rather like a seat plan when you check in for a flight, from which you can select your cabin of choice.

Some budget cruise lines won’t permit you to choose a specific cabin, only a cabin category. Many offer you an option during booking of a “guarantee room” at a discounted rate, for which you waive your right to choose a specific cabin.

The cruise line will assign you one in the category you’ve paid for, but savvy cruisers like to gamble that all the cabins in their category will be sold out, and they’ll be assigned an upgraded cabin.

Don’t bank on it. You’ll more likely be assigned a cabin that nobody else who has booked full price wants. You might end up by noisy lifts, or in your least preferred part of the ship. Nevertheless, guarantee rooms offer savings if you aren’t fussy about location.

How often are cruise ships serviced?

All the time. Even with passengers on board, repairs are ongoing. You’ve likely seen crew painting, mending and replacing whatever has suffered from wear and tear. Soft furnishings are replaced every few years, especially on luxury ships.

More significantly, the International Convention for the Safety of Life at Sea mandates that all ships are serviced in dry dock twice within every five-year period, and with no more than three years between inspections.

However, ships less than 15 years old, which applies to most cruise ships, can replace one dry dock with an underwater survey.

Dry dockings are scheduled long in advance unless unexpected damage has occurred, for example through collision. They usually take about two weeks.

The chief job is to clean and repaint the ship’s hull to avoid biofouling from accumulated barnacles and algae. Other underwater parts of the ship, such as the propellers and stabilisers, are inspected and repaired.

Cruise lines will also take the opportunity to refurbish interiors, make technical upgrades, and replace equipment and parts.

Dry docking might be prolonged if the ship’s interior is significantly altered, for example by rearranging cabins, installing new restaurants, or even extending the ship by cutting it in half and adding a new midsection.

What is expedition cruising all about?

Expedition cruises have a big focus on destination, and particularly on the environment and wildlife of remote places. They do sometimes sail in busy cruise regions such as the Mediterranean but will often stick to minor ports and islands.

Among expedition companies are Aqua, Heritage, Hurtigruten, Lindblad, Ponant, Quark, Seabourn, Silversea and Viking. Three Australian companies also offer impressive expedition cruises: Aurora Expeditions, Coral Expeditions and Scenic.

Expedition ships are small, carrying under 400 guests, but more commonly about 120. In Antarctica, only 100 passengers are permitted ashore at any one time, so you’re better off visiting on a smaller vessel.

The pros are being able to access the Arctic, remote Pacific atolls or seldom-visited islands in places from Indonesia to South Georgia that might otherwise be inaccessible or difficult to reach, yet to do so in considerable comfort.

Guests are taken on excursions by Zodiac or on foot, during which they’re accompanied by experts in ecology, geology or some other relevant subject.

The disadvantage may be the lack of space and amenities on board. Ships are small, and might only have two restaurants and two small lounges, and maybe a gym or compact spa. Entertainment is limited, and tends towards educational lectures.

How big can cruise ships get?

Icon of the Seas, the world’s biggest cruise ship … for now.

In theory, nothing limits the size of cruise ships in terms of engineering, although big superstructures can cause challenges in high winds.

In the 1970s, the biggest cruise ships were about 20,000 gross tonnage, a measure of the ship’s volume. This increased in leaps until, by the 2010s, some ships were more than 200,000gt.

The world’s largest cruise ship is Royal Caribbean’s Icon of the Seas, which launched last year and is 248,663gt. The ship is 364.75 metres long, has 20 decks, and carries a maximum 7600 passengers and 2350 crew. Read Traveller’s review here.

In practice, there are limiting factors, not least the current size of the shipyards (and their lifting cranes) that construct cruise ships, and the dry docks that service them. Also, ships with over-sized draughts or dimensions are unable to access some ports, or the Panama and Suez canals.

Dry docks, jetties and cruise terminals could be increased in size, as runways and airport terminals were for the Airbus A380. But ships also have to be serviced and supplied in turnaround ports, and passengers boarded and disembarked, in reasonable time.

In the end, it will come down to market forces, what customers want, and whether local port communities are prepared to accommodate ever-larger ships.