This was published 1 year ago
Opinion
Solo travel is (mostly) wonderful. But here are a few things I don’t love
Lee Tulloch
Travel columnistAs I write this, I’m almost halfway through five weeks of travel during which I’m spending most of my time travelling alone.
I’m in Venice now, and it’s a perfect city for the solo traveller. It’s safe in most areas, even in the quieter residential parts of the city with empty alleys and deserted squares. Pickpockets are a problem, but travelling alone means there’s no chattering companion to distract you.
Every corner features some fascinating and exquisite detail, and you don’t need the soundtrack of someone else’s commentary to appreciate it.
Do I feel lonely? Not at all. Firstly, it’s crowded in the tourist areas, so there’s always plenty of noise and people-watching if I want it. But I don’t love crowds, so I have the freedom to pick and choose how I’m going to experience the city.
I don’t have to negotiate with others what the day’s schedule will be. Venice is made for wandering aimlessly, even for getting lost. It’s a labyrinth. But if more than one of you have opinions about where you should be – or where you are – that’s potentially a stress point.
Travelling solo, you never have to stand on a street corner arguing with a companion about which direction is the cute little restaurant you walked past earlier in the day. You don’t have to cater to someone else’s moods or whims.
Compromise is a part of life, but if you only have a short time in a place, you can get so much more done alone.
These past few days, I’ve been able to eat when I like, where I like. No one except me is counting the number of gelati I have in a day. I can visit galleries and museums on my own terms. I tend to gallop through them, so it’s a relief not to have to wait for someone who is slower than me to finish their tour.
Best of all, it’s Italy! The Italian waiters respect a woman sitting alone at a restaurant table, whatever age you might be. In fact, fake flirting with Italian waiters is one of the real joys of dining solo in Venice.
I think I’m more open to having conversations with strangers when I’m alone. Someone at the next table starts chatting, or a waiter gives you some tips for their favourite local places, or as happened this trip, you drop into a luxury store for directions and find out that the person you ask is Australian, with an interesting story about why they are living in Venice.
You meet people when you’re travelling with friends, but somehow it seems more special when you’re alone.
But there are a few things about solo travel I don’t love.
Being sick when you’re travelling alone is truly awful, even if you don’t need to go to hospital. You don’t have someone to go to the pharmacy for you, or to carry your bags if you’re feeling faint, or monitor your illness and know when to call the doctor. Hotels and tour leaders sometimes help, but you’re not their sole concern, as you would be for a partner or friend.
If other things go wrong, such as cancelled flights, you can feel abandoned. And you can’t lighten the burden by sharing the funny side of it with someone close.
For some reason, I find travelling alone on a cruise the most difficult. I’m surrounded by couples and family groups, and it seems quite pointed that I’m alone, in a way that’s different to being in a restaurant, where they may only see you once.
If you don’t join in, they tend to consider you a bit of an oddball.
Sometimes you also become the target for the most annoying person on the cruise, who is looking for someone lonely on whom to unload their boring opinions.
Cruises have get-togethers for solo travellers, and people do meet on tours, but it’s not really a solution unless you luck out with people who share your interests. I’ve always preferred my own company to someone who is tedious; I imagine most people who choose to travel solo feel the same way.
There can be safety issues for women who travel alone, more so than men. It can be a bit limiting, especially at night in certain cities.
But last night I went out in Venice solo, wandering aimlessly, grabbing a slice of pizza and a gelato, and watching the crowds at Saint Marco square from a comfortable distance.
It was wonderful.
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