Boutique investment bank Greenhill has reported its 2014 results. In an effort to avoid any more death threats from the bank's Australian off-shoot, we'll use the "criticism sandwich" technique – that is, we'll wrap the stinking turd of bad news between two slices of positive feedback.

So, beginning on a sunny note: we hear the crew at Greenhill's Sydney outpost have greatly improved their ping pong skills in the year ending December 2014. It seems the new table tennis installed in their Governor Phillip Tower digs is clearly paying off. Gold stars all around.