HILDEBRAND: Baited by the bauble: How the outrage-obsessed left ended up backing Iran

A “Bandwagon Bauble” of online activists and hashtag riders are lured by anything that lets them unleash their hatred for Israel and Donald Trump - even if it means backing one of the world’s most brutal regimes, writes Joe Hildebrand.

In the darkest depths of the ocean lives a creature both wholly carnivorous and hideously ugly.

And yet it does not even have to chase its prey — they come to it.

By simply dangling a light in front of its head, the angler fish attracts smaller fish towards it. By the time they realise what grotesque and dangerous company they are in it is too late. The jaws come down.

This is not a difficult concept to grasp — it is literally a scene in Finding Nemo which six-year-old children have no problem instantly comprehending — and yet it is a trap into which so many of the supposedly enlightened political intelligentsia stumble again and again.

I have dubbed it the Bandwagon Bauble. Online activists and hashtag riders are so desperate for ongoing outrage and so blinded with hatred for their enemies they are lured by anything that gives them a chance to unleash their fury, no matter how flimsy, dubious or ultimately diabolic.

And then next thing they know — or rather everyone else knows — they are championing the cause of the most grotesque and murderous people imaginable.

Blinded by hatred for Israel and Trump, the activist left has unwittingly sided with Iran in what has been dubbed as “a masterclass in hypocrisy”. Picture: Mark Kerrison/In Pictures via Getty Images)

For an activist class famous obsessed with being “on the right side of history” and who love to condemn others for “the company you keep”, it is a masterclass in hypocrisy that would be ingenious if it wasn’t so dopily unwitting.

It is obvious to everybody - except them - where I am going with this. The activist left has been so consumed by its hatred of Israel and Donald Trump that it has ended up on the side of Iran.

And not even just Iran, but the Iranian regime who the Iranian people themselves despise for decades of brutal oppression.

This is a government that is almost cartoonishly evil and yet somehow the most self-declaredly politically astute minds on the internet have been effortlessly goaded into backing it or its interests simply on the basis that if Israel and Trump are against it then they must be for it.

This might come with disclaimers that they don’t support the regime - the old “I’m not a racist but …” - or be couched in some pretence of principle but it amounts to the same thing.

If forced to choose between Israel and Iran or Trump and Iran, these guys are going all the way with the Ayatollah.

If forced to choose between Israel and Iran or Trump and Iran, these guys are going all the way with the Ayatollah.

If forced to choose between Israel and Iran or Trump and Iran, the “Bauble Bandwagon” is going all the way with Iran's supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei. Picture: Saul Loeb AFP

For the sake of the individuals’ future careers I won’t name and shame them, nor do I have to as the response has been a darkly comic template.

Even before the US got involved social media was awash with supposedly progressive commentators declaring that Iran had a right to defend itself, at a time when it was launching rocket strikes at Israeli civilian targets in response to Israel blowing up military targets.

This was supposedly an oh-so-clever mimicry of those who said that Israel had a right to defend itself when Hamas conducted the biggest mass killing of Jewish civilians since the Holocaust during a raping and kidnapping spree.

Because of course both those things are the same, just as Israel and Iran are the same — and if you don’t believe me just walk into any gay bar in Tehran and order an appletini. You’ll think you’re in Tel Aviv!

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Just jokes of course! The Iranian regime openly kills people for being gay and has executed thousands, yet the Twitter left seems oddly quiet about that.

Another bizarre hot take is people clutching their pearls because Trump didn’t bomb Iran by the book - as if the real issue is whether he followed protocol, not what provoked the strikes, A US congresswoman actually lamented online that the President had failed to seek permission from congress before launching the attack on the three underground facilities.

It is said that Chuck Norris refuses to acknowledge the periodic table because he only recognises the element of surprise. I’m not sure if the good congresswoman is as familiar with the concept.

Then there is the wizened and learned analysis from both the far left and the far right that this will make the US more of a target for Iran. Presumably allowing a regime whose slogan is literally “Death to America” to develop a nuclear bomb is the more risk-averse option.

It’s just bonkers stuff. If Iran ever became a nuclear power it would be nothing short of catastrophic for the human race and yet the prog-left illuminati are lining up with Vladimir Putin to provide political cover for one of the most brutal, volatile and oppressive regimes on the planet.

But yeah, stay on the right side of history guys! And remember: It’s the company you keep.

Originally published as HILDEBRAND: Baited by the bauble: How the outrage-obsessed left ended up backing Iran