How farm kids cope with leaving home for boarding school
Four rural students explain how “daunting” it is to leave home at age 14 for boarding school, and how they deal with the move.
Kick-starting the boarding-school journey comes with common challenges for country kids – nerves, anxiety, distance, homesickness, to name a few – but whether it’s a leap or a tentative step into boarding life, take it; there will be no regrets.
That’s the consensus from three long-term rural boarders, Zara Boynton from Bright, Claudia Lopez O’Donnell from Warrnambool and Charlotte Rowe from Hamilton.
ZATA BOYNTON, WESLEY COLLEGE
Zara Boynton, who is a year 12 student and boarding captain at Wesley College in Melbourne, said when she first started boarding, she was nervous but also excited.
“I didn’t know anyone and didn’t really know what to expect,” Zara said.
“I remember parking outside Learning in Residence at Wesley at the beginning of my orientation week and seeing three older girls looking at me through the glass. Little did I know they were waiting to welcome me and show me around. They were cheerful and bubbly and this warm introduction to boarding was perfect.”
Zara said her biggest concern was losing her friends at home.
“My biggest worry about moving to boarding school was the distance I was placing between my friends back home and myself,” she said.
“I didn’t know anyone at Wesley and I had amazing friendships at home that I was protective of. The fears I had regarding the loss of friendships at home were not warranted. I am still close with my friends from the northeast and regularly call, text and travel to stay close to them.”
The move from rural living to urban life with the lack of nature and social differences was difficult and challenging at times for Zara but she overcome this by exploring the local nature reserves, bringing objects and plants from home and socialising with a wide variety of people.
Zara knew from the outset that boarding school would suit her but didn’t expect to enjoy it as much as she has.
“My message to the country kids who are on the fence or worried about boarding is to be brave and step out of your comfort zone,” she said.
“It can be daunting to move away from your family and lives in the country but boarding school really prepares you for life after school. It is also important to remember that your home in the country still exists and the friends you have there will remain as long as you put effort in.”
CLAUDIA LOPEZ O’DONNELL, BALLARAT CLARENDON COLLEGE
Year 12 student Claudia Lopez O’Donnell was nervous to be so far from home in a completely new school when she first started boarding at Ballarat Clarendon College but was also excited to be a part of the community.
“It was harder than I expected at first but once I adjusted to the daily routine it became more familiar,” Claudia said.
“Being away from family was the hardest part, and being with people you don’t really know at first is really intimidating because you rely on them to support you through this change.
“Just staying in touch with home really helped but also making friends and having that support is so rewarding.
“When you’re all in this shared experience you feel understood and supported by each other.”
CHARLOTTE ROWE, ST CATHERINE’S SCHOOL MELBOURNE
Charlotte Rowe, who is a year 12 student and 2023 boarding captain at St Catherine’s School in Melbourne, said she was daunted by the prospect of going to boarding school in year 8 but is glad she pushed herself.
“Reflecting, I remember being on the fence (about boarding) but nevertheless curious,” Charlotte said.
“There were lots of changes to consider. How was Dad going to help me with my homework? I won’t be able to go outside at any time and play with dogs. Would I feel claustrophobic with the limited space? Where will I play hockey?
“However, after a trial day at St Catherine’s and an overnighter in the boarding house, I felt much more at ease. Initially it was the fear of the unknown but as I met a few people, saw the school, experienced the cosiness of the boarding house, I felt very welcomed.”
Charlotte’s biggest concern was that the change from being a day student at a co-ed school in the country to boarding at an all-girls school in the city, would be too much to handle.
She said if she could talk to her pre-boarding self, she would say that adjusting to a different setting takes time, no matter how dramatic.
“It is completely normal to feel uncomfortable and unsettled at times but you shouldn’t let that shroud the positive aspects of a new opportunity such as meeting inspiring people and gaining new experiences,” Charlotte said.
TEST RUN ADVANTAGE
Ballarat Grammar assistant head – residential Chris Van Styn has been involved in boarding for 17 years and said the top three concerns for first time boarders were consistently similar; missing family and friends at home, integrating into the school community and academic standing compared to the student’s previous school.
“They are all genuine concerns and I think the key we have found for them is having a three week head start program for years 8 to 12 starting in mid November,” Chris said.
“We did it for the first time last year. They went into the holidays having done three full weeks of academics and boarding. It was a big advantage. A lot of that anxiety dissipated.”
He added that the best thing prospective boarders and their families could do was enter with their eyes open because it would be tough at times. Research, speak with other boarding families, visit campuses and inspect boarding facilities.
“Look really carefully around the boarding facilities to ensure it is a big part of that school. In choosing a school you want one that boarding is front and centre and not an afterthought,” Chris said.
“The best thing is if you can get your feet on the ground to have a look and if there is a chance to stay – do a try before you buy. No one wants to come into boarding uninformed.”
PARENTS’ PERSPECTIVE
Susan Rees, mother of Ella and Lara Rees, had long known about Wesley College before she decided to send her daughters to board at the school in Melbourne.
The farming family from Gatum, near Hamilton, looked Victoria-wide before deciding on Wesley after seeing the new facilities for boarding and the support that the favourable student-to-staff ratios could provide.
Ella started first, graduating in 2020, and Lara started in 2022.
“Whenever Ella came home during the holidays, she always had a new experience to share, which made me want to go to Wesley more and more,” Lara said.
“She told me a lot about the people she had met and what she had done that term, which really showed me what opportunities I had waiting for me.”
Lara started boarding at Wesley in Year 9.
This year she hopes to take part in more of Wesley’s experiential learning programs in outback Western Australia, and to take full advantage of the co-curricular program.
“I love how Wesley supports students in all their different pursuits and interests, whether it be sport, drama or music,” Lara said. “The school I went to in the country was small and it kind of felt like everyone had to be the same. I just wanted something different.”
Lara has found great support at Wesley for her academic goals.
“Last year, in year 9, we spent an hour each weekday studying, with a tutor to help us. That helped me so much while I was adjusting to the academic expectations of a new school,” she said.
“You’ll make so many friends, build your confidence in so many situations and be really well prepared for university and life ahead. You will have so many life experiences that you might not ever get anywhere else.”
For Susan, it’s life coming full circle to see her daughters at Wesley and at university.
“My own mother worked tirelessly to give us the best education possible, and my brother still has a close knit group of Wesley friends,” Susan said. “I feel the pleasure of the girls finding their people and spreading their wings at Wesley two-fold, as a mother and also as a daughter honouring my late mother’s legacy.”
The cost of a boarding education has been going up at a steeper rate than the consumer price index, putting pressure on rural families who have limited education choices for their children. Compare fees for 136 boarding schools nationwide.
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