When friends found out I was going to Paris, they all wanted one thing

If butter tastes like heaven, La Grande Epicerie de Paris might just be God’s pantry. Located in the heart of Paris, the gastronomic department store has been part of the city’s culinary tapestry for decades. It’s hardly an unknown quantity among visiting gourmands but it pinged back on the tourist radar recently when Instagrammers discovered that not only could you buy high-quality French butter but get it vacuum-sealed to take home on the plane, too.

Super spread: A wide selection of butters and flavours at La Grande Epicerie de Paris.Credit: Alamy

Now, it might sound silly to go all the way to Paris to buy butter, but when I mentioned my quest, everyone leaned in. My in-laws and friends – even a work acquaintance – got in touch to ask if I could bring some home to Australia for them.

It’s easy to understand why. Stretching across culture and class, delightful in both the savoury and the sweet, and possessing both simplicity and versatility, butter is the hero of innumerable dishes. It’s also big business in France. Strict laws exist to preserve the providence and quality: unsalted doux butter must be at least 82 per cent butterfat; semi-sel or salted butter more than 80 per cent.

The 150 different varieties of butter stocked at La Grande Epicerie are considered some of the best in the world. Most are made with milk from grass-fed, free-range cows in northern France. The butter is churned and fermented in the traditional way, then shaped with paddles by hand and stacked behind the giant glass doors of La Cremerie, where tourists with little or no understanding of French crowd three-deep, trying to decipher what to buy (and what they’re actually buying).

When I finally get to the fridge, I’m flustered and grab what’s within reach: classic doux and sel 4 per cent, including butter with citrus and herbs, cocoa, vanilla, and yuzu. Sadly, I leave behind the seaweed, skip the smoked butter, and at €15 ($25) a pop , sadly forgo the truffle butter. I end up with six blocks for myself and another five for friends. When vacuum-sealing, I ensure each pat of butter is set out separately and the millimetre-high “MADE IN FRANCE” labelling is visible.

Of course, there are still two big barriers to getting my butter home: keeping it cool and Australian customs. With a lifetime supply of Aldi cold bags back home, I skip the posh €15 Epicerie variety: my strategy is to freeze the butter the night before my flight and appropriate my son’s insulated lunchbox. I figure if I can keep a cut lunch cool on a 35-degree school day, I can keep butter cool for a 24-hour long haul to Australia.

A shopping experience: La Grande Epicerie de Paris.Credit: Alamy

The second barrier requires more delicacy: navigating customs. I check the Australian Border Force customs webpage: if it’s from an approved FMD-free (foot and mouth disease) country, is commercially packaged, clearly labelled from France, and is under 10 kilos, it would be subject to inspection but should be good to go.

Of course, the general unfriendliness of customs officers means there’s always a lingering sense of feeling guilty even if you’ve done nothing wrong, a feeling not helped by the Squid Game-esque numbered door ritual they play at Sydney Airport. Add in jet lag, two kids, a pram, four backpacks, two carry-ons, and three pieces of checked luggage to my 12 pats of butter, and my anxiety is high.

However, I’m waved through in seconds by a bored-looking officer.

The next morning, I take a loaf of fresh sourdough and a pack of milk arrowroot biscuits, make a big pot of tea, grab the scissors and – like Newman from Seinfeld requesting two quarts of milk to demolish muffin bottoms – I disappear into a dark room with my butter to be alone, while my husband distracts the children by serving them margarine on toast.

It doesn’t disappoint. The Boudier butter with Madagascan vanilla is subtle and smooth, darker in colour and best eaten with a teaspoon, while their chocolate butter, featuring chopped cocoa beans from Ghana, is unexpectedly bittersweet. The Le Beurre Du Pont citrus and herb butter is a delightful surprise, featuring real chunks of rind, which I pair with fresh honey.

It’s just perfect. I don’t know if it’s the French touch, the warm afterglow of my trip, or simply the indulgence. Maybe it doesn’t matter. Whatever the reason, butter just seems to make everything better.

The details

Shop
La Grande Epicerie de Paris has two outlets in Paris: 38 Rue de Sevres and 80 Rue de Passy. Opening hours vary; see lagrandeepicerie.com. The vacuum seal machine is located by the exit, with bags available for €1.

Stay
Hotel Le Bellechasse has excellent rooms in Saint Germain from €271 ($467) See lebellechasse.com

The writer travelled at her own expense.