Incoherent word-salad: rattled PM’s train wreck Qantas response

The incoherent rage on display from the PM on Tuesday revealed a man who has been inside the Canberra bubble for so long he is incapable of understanding why people might be angry at the lurks and perks he has enjoyed for decades.

The incoherent rage on display from Anthony Albanese on Tuesday revealed a man who has been inside the Canberra bubble for so long he is incapable of understanding why people might be angry at the lurks and perks he has enjoyed for decades.

As revealed in Joe Aston’s book The Chairman’ Lounge, the Prime Minister has received scores of Qantas and Emirates upgrades worth tens – if not hundreds - of thousands of dollars.

These upgrades, it should be clear, were not just for work trips but also when he was on holiday.

“Very nice!” as Borat would say.

More seriously Aston’s book alleges Albo liaised personally with Qantas’s then boss Alan Joyce over his upgrades as well as asking to have his son Nathan granted membership of the Chairman’s lounge.

On Tuesday he tried to come out out swinging.

Not to deny the allegations, but to attack Aston because – wait for it! – he once worked for Liberal politicians.

Anthony Albanese responds to the scandal on Tuesday.Picture: SKY NEWS

“I don’t see declarations that he’s a former Liberal Party staffer for a number of senior members of the Liberal Party, including Joe Hockey and Bruce Baird,” he said.

Err, actually that’s in the book Albo, it’s also on his LinkedIn.

He continued: “I don’t see declarations that he’s a former Qantas employee. I don’t see declarations that in June, a few months ago, he was a guest - he and John Howard - at a Liberal Party fundraiser in the electorate of Wentworth.”

Which would seem to suggest we should be ignoring this story because not only is Aston a Liberal, he’s also a disaffected Qantas employee.

Really?

He’s had months to work out how he was going to tackle this story, and three days after it broke, that’s the best he can do?

Having smeared Aston, he moved onto the classic Canberra defense whenever a politician spills gravy on their shirt: “Look, they’ve done it too!”

“I note that I’m far from being the most frequent person of being upgraded,” he went on.

“Paul Fletcher’s been upgraded at least 69 times that he’s declared - 69. He’s been in parliament for less time than I’ve been in.”

Listening to this it was hard not to feel sorry for whoever it was on the Prime Minister’s staff who had to spend their weekend combing through the public record so their boss could make this brilliant remark.

Jodie Haydon, Alan Joyce and Anthony Albanese at the Qantas 100th Gala Dinner.

Until that is one remembers that as taxpayers it was we who were paying for this work to be done.

A journalist tried to bring us back to the issue at hand: “Did you call Alan Joyce personally for these upgrades?”

“Qantas have a number in terms of bookings that are made - private bookings.”

(Not a number that is available to ordinary mortals, it goes without saying.)

“The only discussions that I can recall with Alan Joyce certainly were discussed not through calls - we discussed the first flight from Australia to Dubai on an A380 - I might note as well that the Today show, Sunrise - it was full of media. These were not commercial flights. They were recording and doing interviews along the way. Kerri-Anne Kennerley was there in Dubai along with other people from The Project and for all of these TV shows. It was about an arrangement between Australia and the UAE that was held in Dubai, returned.”

Huh? What does that even mean?

He went on: “Every other flight, I paid for. Every other flight. These were two non-commercial flights that were declared in which transport ministers and shadow ministers travelled as well. It’s as simple as that. It’s very transparent out there. I’ve declared everything in accordance with all of the rules.

“And I note that there are others who I’m aware of have not necessarily declared all of the flights that they’ve taken. I note the Shadow Transport Minister was out there saying she hadn’t declared - she hadn’t received any upgrades, and then had to put out a media release saying - well, actually, she had - as well as getting other flights.”

Okay, so the media were on one of the free flights and Bridget Mackenzie seems to have missed some of hers, but be that as it may, it doesn’t answer the question he was asked, does it?

Nor does his reiteration “I have, at all times - at all times - acted in a transparent and appropriate way.”

Prime Minister Anthony Albanese and Alan Joyce unveil their Yes23 livery last year.

A journalist tried again. Did you talk to Alan Joyce directly about these upgrades? If you did, do you think that was appropriate?”

“There is no accusations being made with any specifics at all about any of this. None. None. People are, Peter Dutton is making this statement. If there is a suggestion to be made, let it be made, specifically and I will answer it but I have said very clearly that I recall direct discussions with Alan Joyce over the flights, the Emirates, Qantas flight to Dubai and of course the first flight to Perth.

“They are the only times I was on a plane with Alan Joyce of the 22 flights, 10 of them were during the leadership ballot between myself and Bill Shorten in 2013 over a 1-month period where both Qantas and Virgin provided upgrades for flights that were paid for by the Australian Labor Party to make sure there was not any cost to taxpayers for what was internal business. In terms of transparency, Bridget McKenzie can answer questions herself about things.”

To call this incoherent garbage a word-salad would be a kindness.

Naturally, he then moved on to Peter Dutton, who he imagined was in the same situation in this regard “with the exception that I don’t have access to a private jet on call” – reference to the opposition leader’s occasional use of Gina Rinehart’s private jet.

As I said, Albanese seems genuinely bewildered as to why people might be angry at this.

“I don’t have a trust. I don’t have a family trust, don’t have any shares, never had any shares in any company. I have always acted in an open and transparent way and it is up to others to say why it is they have trusts, why it is we don’t know what they own, what they invest in, what income they have, all hidden away.”

So did he lobby Alan Joyce personally for some of these upgrades? Did he ask that his son Nathan be put into the Chairman’s Lounge in his own right?

Your guess is as good as mine.

Originally published as Incoherent word-salad: rattled PM’s train wreck Qantas response