Influencer's controversial take on women choosing their own engagement rings

“Call me old fashioned, but I think this is so weird.”

Image: TikTok @jacqueline.monroe

How would you feel about having your partner pick your engagement ring out for you as a surprise? Does this make you feel happy, or stressed out? 

Depending on your answer, one woman on TikTok believes you might have an issue, and her opinion has ignited a debate online.

“Call me old fashioned, but I think it is so weird when the girl knows exactly what ring she's getting,” the woman named Jacqeline Monroe says in her TikTok. 

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"So insecure and entitled"

“I feel like women have gotten so insecure and so entitled about their ring because of social media and how it will look to other people, but they’ve forgotten what the proposal and what the ring even symbolises.

“If you even have anxiety that your man is going to get you the wrong ring. You're with the wrong guy… the right guy will not f**k that up.”

As she speaks to the camera, Jacqueline showcases her manicured hand sporting a beautiful large platinum and diamond ring; presumably chosen by her groom to be. 

He may have chosen a winner, but in my case - twenty three years ago I may add - I was not going to let my then boyfriend make a mistake.

I knew I was going to be wearing this piece of jewellery my whole life and I needed to love it. So we chose it together which seeing as we’re still happily married, makes me less insecure and more … confident of my own choices?!

While Jaccqueline says she knows she might sound “stuck up or tacky” she says she would never allow herself to be with a man who wouldn’t know what to choose on her behalf.

No pressure then!

She ends by making a fair point “that your ring symbolizes your partner's love and commitment to you.”

“It's not about perfection and other people's opinions. Let your man have his moment and pick out the ring for you.”

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"I agree with you!"

Her clip ignited a debate on this big and lifelong decision, especially with the trend for having the ring picked out before the proposal.

Many women felt equally romantic about their partner picking a ring to symbolise their love.

“I agree with you. I always look at my ring and just try to imagine everything that was going through his mind to find this design, sending it to the designer, getting it made/ planning the proposal.”

Another agreed: “I actually agree with you. My fiancé tried to gauge what kind of rings I liked, plus he looked at my other jewellery but he ultimately chose it all on his own. It’s not a ring I would’ve chosen.”

Other’s felt very differently however.

“I definitely would like to have some input into the ring because I don’t wear jewellery and I’m very specific about what I like. If he’s going to spend money, I want it to be money well spent.”

Disagree! My husband bought me earrings recently because he knows I like mushrooms! So sweet right?! Lol they are not mushrooms they are wizard hats, he couldn’t tell the difference.”

A third agreed: “ I designed my ring, not because my fiancé can’t take direction or doesn’t know what I like but because he knows I like to be INVOLVED. Have my dream ring and the experience of creating it.”

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"He cannot read your mind!"

One man commented that sometimes, a little guidance is required in these matters.

“No matter how much he loves you, he CANNOT read your mind! If you don’t tell him what you like, how would he know!?”

A jeweller weighed in to say she is always happy to provide advice to a man shopping alone.

“When I sold rings to solo guys, I asked them to pull up their partner’s socials and I’d get them to show me pics of them so i can get their 'style' then make suggestions from there.”

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"A ring is a symbol of love"

Finally, one person suggested it really doesn’t matter who picks the ring, as long as there is love.

“The ring is just a symbol of our love. As long as the ring looks nice it’s okay and if not it’s also okay we’ll have an open discussion about it later because we are close but the primary focus is love.”

Originally published as Influencer's controversial take on women choosing their own engagement rings