‘I was fat-shamed going through the drive thru with my kids'

"I overheard them saying something so nasty, I instinctively wanted to protect my children," the mum tells Kidspot.

As most parents know, the end of the year is the craziest time of year. With so many events and parties, is even more hectic than usual.

It was at the end of one of these super chaotic weeks, on a Friday evening at 7 pm after my son’s sports training ended late, that I decided we’d head through a local fast-food drive-thru for dinner.

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While we rarely have takeaway and even less often have fast food like this, on this day with my husband being away for work all week, we were all especially exhausted and starving and there was no way that I was going home to cook.

So, I ordered my three children a kid’s meal each and also an ice cream dessert as an extra treat for being so well-behaved all week. I also ordered myself a burger meal.

As I sat in the car unable to move forward yet because there was another one in front, I heard the voice of the youngish-sounding female that had just taken my order, begin to say something.

At first, I thought she was talking to me but then as I listened to what she was saying I realised she had inadvertently left her microphone on and was talking to a colleague.

The woman said it had been a "chaotic week" and she doesn't usually get takeaway. Image: IStock

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"I bet the kids are all fat too"

“I can't believe how many parents feed their kids this crap,” she said.

“I bet you they’re all fat too,” she added, sniggering.

Instinctively, I glanced in the rear-view mirror to see whether my kids had heard what she had said. Thankfully they were all occupied with some game that had been left in the back seat of the car and weren’t paying attention.

While I was relieved that it was only me who heard this, the words she had said, her nasty, judgmental comment hit me, and I realised I was quite upset.

As the car in front of me slowly moved up toward the window, the more upset I became because I knew I’d soon be face to face with the person who’d said this.

I knew that I shouldn’t be concerned with what a stranger, a young stranger at that, thought of me and my parenting, her words just seemed so harsh.

The reality is, I know I care about my kids and always look after their health, that we rarely eat this type of food and no one in our family has health issues or is overweight but regardless, her judgment just seemed so unnecessary and maybe it was because they took me so much by surprise that it upset me so much.

I didn't want her to see me cry

When it was my turn to drive up to the window, I saw the girl wearing a headband with a microphone.  She turned from taking another drive-thru customer’s order and then looked at me, smiling the sweetest most innocent smile as if butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth.

She then asked me how my day was and told me the total amount to pay as if she had never said such a horrible thing only a minute before.

Just as I was convinced that perhaps her comments were referring to someone else or that I had misunderstood what she meant, I saw her look into my back seat and at each of my children sitting there, as if checking to see whether her assessment that they’d be fat was correct.

By this point, I was on the verge of tears. I didn’t say anything because I knew if I did, I would cry and allowing this teenage kid with no right to say such nasty things to see me that way just wasn’t an option. 

She left me feeling as if I was poisoning my kids, that their entire future health would now fail because they ate some chips. While in hindsight I know it is silly to let this impact me so much, it was just something I didn’t need at the end of a long week and ultimately, it shouldn't have happened.

After we received our meals, I drove to a park a few blocks away and we all sat on the picnic table and seats eating our meals. While I only picked at my food, still feeling sick from it all, my kids gobbled theirs all down without a worry and then spent the next half an hour playing on the playground oblivious to it all and thankfully so.

This story was first published in 2022 and updated in December 2023.

Originally published as ‘I was fat-shamed going through the drive thru with my kids'