Time to do Tuesday (cheap chocolate within)

All the news that's fit to mint

All the news that's fit to mint

The Queen is not well. 

Queen Elizabeth II will not open Parliament on Tuesday for the first time in decades, with Buckingham Palace saying the monarch has been struggling with mobility issues in recent months.

A statement from Buckingham Palace the Queen had been experiencing "episodic mobility problems" and "in consultation with her doctors has reluctantly decided that she will not attend the State Opening of Parliament."

Prince Charles will read The Queen’s speech on her behalf, and Prince William will also be in attendance.

Warhol's Marilyn is the most expensive American artwork

Andy Warhol's Shot Sage Blue Marilyn sold for AUD $281m at auction this morning. 

It marks a new record for an American artwork sold at auction.

It's slightly below the AUD $288m estimate by the auction house.

The phrase "iconic" is bandied about regularly but when speaking about this piece of work, it's required. The screen print which has been repurposed, refashioned and repackaged so many times since it's hard to imagine why we all got our knickers in a twist about Kim Kardashian tapping into the Monroe archives last week.

It's listed as "Lot 36A" of the Christie's auction schedule with an "estimate on request". If sold, the instantly recognisable hand painted acrylic and silkscreen work by the pop artist with Marilyn's face painted in bold blues, pinks and yellow, will become the most expensive 20th century artwork ever sold at auction.

$281m for something you can print off as a jpeg at Big W?

Shot Sage Marilyn by Andy Warhol is being sold at auction by Christie's

Investing in this specific piece of Warhol's Marilyn phase is pretty special. 

It was made when the artist was still using a fussy, multi layered printing method that gave his finished products more clarity and precision.

Warhol quit using it after Shot Sage Marilyn as he found it too fussy and too much effort so switched to a cheaper more industrial process which increased his print runs and decreased the value of his works and production quality.

You'd think dropping more than $200m on something it would be in pristine condition. Well it doesn't work like that in the art world. (It's like men, the more damaged they are, the more desirable they are found to be.... just me?)

Shot Sage Marilyn carries a bit of baggage. It may have, on close inspection, bullet wounds. Back in the late 1960s, performance artist Dorothy Podber asked Warhol if she could "shoot" the painting (and its two siblings). Instead of pulling out her camera she pulled out a gun and shot a bullet through them. 

Graceless Albanese

Speaking of copping a spray, former Australian of the Year and advocate Grace Tame seems to have spat the chewie with Opposition Leader Anthony Albanese.

Albo tweeted a photo of him and broadcaster Alan Jones on Monday afternoon.

Good to chat with Alan Jones today in his new Sydney studios. pic.twitter.com/SRFGbCL1bp

— Anthony Albanese (@AlboMP) May 9, 2022

It wasn't received well.

Yeah nah, this is where you could’ve just frowned and walked off. Or better yet, not done it.

There are plenty of other ways to broaden your messaging without enabling known agents of sexism and abuse.

None of us is obliged to speak to bigots.

The optics of this aren’t good.

— Grace Tame (@TamePunk) May 9, 2022

Just two weeks ago Tame and Albo's friendship made headlines for their InStyle cover story where he made Tame cry when talking to her about the sacrifices his single mother made when he was growing up in community housing in Sydney.

On after his pow wow with Jones she tweeted her displeasure not once but twice and doubled down by invoking her infamous "side eye" sledge - her weapon of choice that she debuted alongside Prime Minister Scott Morrison back in January.

The first Side Eye.

She's consistent with her criticism of people in positions of power.

side eye SIDE EYE https://t.co/Pgb2Owmft1

— Grace Tame (@TamePunk) May 9, 2022

Schools get schooled

Some news that will be music to the ears of those calling for a more modern approach to education in this country. As the ninth version of the curriculum, which was published on Monday, will begin being taught in classrooms from next year.

As well as a strong focus on the basic phonics and crucial literacy and numeracy skills, kids will be taught about their "eco identity", how to date safely and what clear sexual consent looks, feels and sounds like. 

Some drastically new things kids will be educated in and about include:

• Mindfulness and positive self-talk will be covered off in PE.
• From the age of 14, students will start investigating the legal requirements for their state or territory in relation to seeking, giving and refusing consent to sex. 
• Society and environment classes will explore the virtues of a vegetarian diet. One activity is to prepare a presentation on food that has been “prepared sustainably’’, using local ingredients to cut down on emissions, using vegetarian or vegan dishes or kangaroo instead of beef, and not using single-use plastic for serving.
• Year 10 students must study World War II, as well as a learning strand called "Building Modern Australia" that'll focus on the impact of British colonisation on the lives of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islanders.
• The origins of Australia's democracy, and its Christian and Western heritage, will be taught "explicitly", along with the diversity of Australian communities through migration.

ALDI hear out prayer

Lettuce is expensive, so while the politicians still can't figure out how to help ease the increasing cost of living pressures Australians are experiencing, ALDI reckons it has cracked the code.

Coincidentally it involves shopping there. (Shocking).

The ALDI Price Report 2022, compiled via research undertaken by PwC and YouGov, will be released on Tuesday and "offers a window into the attitudes shaping the weekly shop and reveals the savings shoppers can enjoy by switching to ALDI".

Turns out the number crunchers have found Aussie shoppers can actually save about $1500 a year when shopping at ALDI. 

"Data analysed by PwC shows a staggering price gap of 15.6% compared to the cheapest products at the nearest competitor," a spokesperson told The Oz.

When it comes to like for like comparisons, the low-fi, no frills supermarket said "hold my cheap European chocolate".

"The price gap widens significantly to 24.7% when comparing ALDI to the equivalent branded products, saving the average family a massive $2468 per year if they usually buy branded items." 

Guess we should expect more brawls over apples and oranges as well as cheap cook wear and ski gear this year then.

Emergency warning: Don't call 000

Extraordinary scenes in WA overnight with the state's ambulance service - St John - issuing a rare public plea that if you're sick, don't call them.

"It is likely there will be a delay in an ambulance reaching you... Our priority is to provide care to Western Australians who require life-saving assistance," a spokesperson said. 

About 25% of the ambo fleet was stuck ramped outside Perth hospitals waiting to have patients seen to. It comes amid Covid cases continue to climb in WA this week and on the eve of the local Budget being handed down on Thursday where it's expected the State will bank a surplus of more than $5bn.

Scenes are equally grim in South Australia where a 92-year-old grandmother and sick people were forced to sit outside a hospital and endured 12C overnight temperatures due to Covid testing policies. 

Tuesday's Adelaide Advertiser has sparked outrage.

Shocking scenes in Sri Lanka

As protests get more heated, resulting in monks and a lot of civilians reportedly being injured at the weekend, Sri Lankan Prime Minister Mahinda Rajapaksa has resigned.

It follows months of unrest due to the country's worst economic crisis in decades. Amid all this chaos, the calls demanding that 76-year-old Rajapaksa and his brother, who is the president, step down were finally heard.

Sir Lanka is on brink of bankruptcy and has suspended payments on its foreign loans.

Its economic woes have brought on a political crisis, with the government facing widespread protests and a no-confidence motion in Parliament.

Trade unions have called for a general strike until the president and the rest of his ruling family leave office. The resignation of the prime minister now means that the entire cabinet is dissolved.

A curfew has now been imposed across the island nation of 22 million people due to the violence breaking out in Colombo.

Sri Lanka on brink of civil war? Images of homes of MPs, Mayors etc set on fire by protesters in different places. #SrilankanCrisis pic.twitter.com/JI0u3RhBlD

— Shiv Aroor (@ShivAroor) May 9, 2022