‘Washed up’ at 35? Our Dan deserved better

Daniel Ricciardo on the grid fort he Singapore Grand Prix in September. Picture: Getty Images

At long last TV has transformed motor racing from sport into entertainment.

To paraphrase Neil Postman, television transforms sports figures into mere images, focusing on their appearance and emotional appeal rather than their skills or humanity. This is a world where people are judged more on how they come across on television rather than their substantive qualifications. And, in politics, on their appearances on the first 14 seasons of The Apprentice. Want proof?

Bernie Arnault, 75, of Paris, France has just put a lazy $150m a year into sponsoring F1 for 10 years. Bernie and his family more or less own LVMH which is worth about $535bn, makes $138bn in a bad year (for cardigan-wearing bean counters that’s a ROE of 23 per cent) and whose shares are down to just over $1k each at the moment. A buying opportunity?

Now, his company doesn’t make disc brakes, tyres, automotive chemicals or wheels. But it does make upmarket drinks like Moet and Hennessy, schmutter like Chris Dior (no relation to our friend Front and Back), Gucci, perfumes, Tag Heuer watches, Tiffany jewellery and trains, hotels, shops, yachts and newspapers and mags.

Does this mean Rolex, Ferrari sparkling wine and Puma will get the flick from the paddock?

Yes. If Danny Ricciardo were still driving (more on this shameful episode of Drive to Survive later) his podium caper of drinking sparkling from his shoe would mean a switch from Italian to French (and let’s not talk about the tinea risks to his throat).

Bernie is on a winner. Next year is the 75th birthday of F1. Trivia time: Who won the first GP at Silverstone in SDL? Nino Farina, 118, of Turin. Unfortunately, in an Alfa. (Please no emails about earlier F1 races, they weren’t world championships).

Anyway, expect helium balloons for the kiddies, free BBQ sangas and all the beer or Moet, Krug or Hennessy Beauté du Siécle Cognac ($246k) you can drink (at public bar prices) on May 3.

Then this weekend the boundary between sport and Hollywood blurs even further when Canadian actor Keanu Reeves drives a Toyota GR at Indianapolis in the Toyota Gazoo series.

Keanu’s race is simply a scene- setter for the Indianapolis 8 Hour with rich people driving cars that look like BMWs, Chevs, Ferraris, Mercedes-Benzs and Porsches competing in what organisers call ‘‘the longest race of the year at the Racing Capital of the World’’.

Of course, if there’s lots of safety cars at the Bathurst 1000 next weekend, it will be the longest race of the year. It will be Craig Lowndes 30th drive around the mountain and his 50th birthday. Go for it Lowndesy.

OK one more. For the odd elder of this column’s 20 readers, Renauld Sunglasses has launched Steve McQueen Le Mans sunnies, a snip at $1500. Soap dodger Gareth Llewelyn liked the old glasses so much he resurrected the brand first worn by Elvis, Jimmy Dean, Jackie Kennedy, Jim Clark and similar, and now worn by Tiffany Trump, Kendall Jenners and other people you have never heard of. During the filming of The 1970 Film Le Mans, McQueen wore a pair of the old Renauld and Gareth was selected by the Estate to reproduce these for the first time since the film’s release in 1970. The Steve McQueen Le Mans (trademark) Edition is presented “as worn” by McQueen during filming. The Car 20 Edition will feature an actual part of Steve McQueen’s Porsche 917, encased in the Renauld Marque, embedded in the sunglass temple. This precious keepsake is part of the original bodywork from the Porsche 917, race number 20, as driven by McQueen.

Look no matter what the Red Bull bosses say, they have treated Dan Ricciardo (35) badly. Late this week, Horner said ‘‘some older drivers struggle for adaptability as they age – perhaps contributing to Ricciardo’s struggles’’. Tell that to Ferdie Alonso 43, Hamo 39 and Hulkenberg 37. Danny deserved a better send off. Over the last 74 years, only 773 persons have raced in F1. Over the last 72 years 18 Australians have raced. Five of them have won races. Jack Brabham won 14; Alan Jones 12; Mark Webber 9; Daniel Riccardi 8 and Oscar Piastri 2 (so far). Rumours of Danny running in Supercars for millions are rife but there’s been a huge offer, backed by the LVMH of Australia, Coopers and luxury hotel group the Kensi for the honey badger to join the Weekend Australian Rally team (WART) for this November’s Adelaide Rally. Team spokesman Michael McMichael, indeterminate age but older than his co-driver, told us: “the opportunities for Danny in our team are limitless”. He added: “Not only can we show him how to read the Smoothline pace notes but drink tinea-free Cooper’s Sparkling from his WART thongs”.

Warning! warning!

Chrysler has recalled more than 154,000 2020-24 Jeep Wrangler and 2022-24 Jeep Grand Cherokee plug-in hybrid electric vehicles due to fire risk. The US government says: “Owners should park their vehicles outside and away from structures and other vehicles until their vehicle has been remedied. In addition, owners should not charge unrepaired vehicles, because the risk of fire is higher in a charged battery and the risk of fire is reduced when the battery is depleted”.

Maybe that’s what happened to readers Helen and Jerry Chaberka’s Jeep Grand Cherokee Trail Hawk bought from Berwick Jeep, Berwick’s trusted Jeep dealers, at 257 Princes Highway, Hallam, Victoria. “Call Stellantis’ Tom Petty because the automaker is free falling,” says Morning Brew’s Molly Liebergall. “Sales across its 14 car brands tanked last quarter for the fifth time in a row amid flailing demand for the Jeep parent’s overstocked, relatively expensive inventory.”

Car of the day is the 2020 McLaren Speedtail, number 46 of only 106 examples ever produced, all of which were hand-assembled by McLaren Automotive at their world-leading Technology Centre, which is shared with its Formula 1 racing team.

Offered by Tom Hartley Jr in SDL. Broad Arrow sold one a few months back for about $3.5m.

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