Ford Ranger FX4 Max 2021 review: this big pick-up is a real let-down

I can’t understand why even one person would want to buy a Ford Ranger, let alone the multitudes that seem to have done so in Australia.

Ford Ranger FX4 Max 2021

There is a mistake I really must stop making, which is to assume that people actually want to hear what I think. When a neighbour bounded up to me recently, excited to see that I had a Ford Ranger obscuring the front of my house and large swathes of the sky, I should have thought to ask him whether he owned one before launching into a tirade about how I can’t understand why even one person would want to buy a Ford Ranger, let alone the multitudes that seem to have done so in Australia.

In February this year, it was the fourth best-selling car in our country, which is particularly impressive when you consider that it isn’t a car, it’s a pick-up truck. My neighbour, of course, owns a Ranger (and he loves it, too – apparently it’s good for loading his children into the back seats), which I should have deduced because people so often ask me about cars they’ve already bought.

Beaming stranger: “What do you think of the Toyota Prius?”

Me: “I try not to, but the nightmares keep coming back.”

Father-in-law: “We’re thinking of buying a Volvo.”

Me: “Come on, you’re too young to give up!” (Yes, he’d already ordered one.)

People think I enjoy being offensive, but I just have a knack for it, and it occurred to me in the past week that if I said what I really think of the Ford Ranger, I’d be offending just about everyone because I see them everywhere I go, filling up parking spaces like an elephant’s foot in a thong.

Ford Ranger FX4 Max 2021

So I’m going to start by saying how much I loved the big, stupid, galumphing machine – whenever I wasn’t in it. Truly, I get why so many people like the Ranger: it looks like the man you wanted to be when you were growing up – Chuck Norris/Mel Gibson/Keanu Reeves in a flannelette shirt, on wheels. The FX4 Max dual cab 4x4 variant I had was even more ruggedly alluring thanks to its special wheels, snazzy grille and splattering of stickers ($750 worth of stickers, in fact).

We really do choose cars with our eyes, at least at first, but at some stage surely people have to clamber over this Ranger’s stupid side steps, which must have been designed by someone with a peculiar hatred for the human shin bone, and into the time warp of a cabin.

To be fair, a new Ranger is about to go on sale to replace the almost decade-old design I was lumped with, but there are parts of this car that feel even older, such as the screens, and the technology, and the squidgy steering wheel, and the cabin materials, and the handbrake (OK, I did like that).

Speaking of ageing rapidly, the car I borrowed was approaching 17,000km and yet the undercarriage was squeaking and creaking in a way I’d not heard since I was last in a car with a Kingswood badge. If I’d spent $66,190 on this thing and it felt this worn out this quickly (and I’ll acknowledge, all of those kilometres were driven by heavy-handed and cruel motoring journalists, but still) I’d be apoplectic.

Ford Ranger FX4 Max 2021.

The Ranger’s ride, handling and steering, which are often referred to in expert reviews as “car like” were more “what the truck” like, in my opinion, and the whole driving experience was brutal in its simplicity. Yes, it is a truck, not a car, and as a friend pointed out I tend to hate all utes, but I was honestly shocked at how much I disliked driving this one.

I’d like to tell you it was at least as grunting and powerful as it looks, but it wasn’t, because its 2.0-litre four-cylinder diesel engine was noisy and insufficient, with 157kW and 500Nm just not enough for 2.2 tonnes of noisome pick-up. Apparently I should have been impressed by the Ranger’s 10-speed automatic transmission, but I was too busy shaking my head at how noisy and agricultural the diesel engine was.

The problem, clearly, is that I’m being unfair and expecting the Ranger to drive like a car, but then perhaps that’s because so many people buy them to use as a family vehicles these days.

This Ranger variant has All Terrain tyres on tractor-sized wheels, so it’s never going to ride politely. Its centre of gravity is somewhere near my ear, so it’s going to have body roll, and it’s tough enough to do serious off-roading – it can tow up to 3500kg and has 981kg of “payload”, apparently, which sounds as suspiciously American as the whole ute looks.

While I enjoy looking at it, and probably harbour fantasies that I look good while driving it, I can’t think of many cars I’d personally be less happy to live with.

Last year, however, the Ranger was the second biggest-selling “car” in Australia (and when the new one starts rolling out shortly, sales will go ballistic) so essentially, and as usual, most people don’t really want to know what I think, because they’ve already bought one. But I’ll tell them anyway: you’ve all gone mad.

Ford Ranger FX4 Max dual cab 4x4

ENGINE: 2.0-litre turbocharged four-cylinder diesel (157kW/500Nm). Average fuel 8.0 litres per 100km

TRANSMISSION: Ten-speed automatic, all-wheel drive

PRICE: $66,190

RATING: ★★