Thoughts and prayers

Before Scott Morrison’s address to the Australian Christian Conference goes down in history, we thought it was worth noting the confidants who received honours.

Scott Morrison.

Before Scott Morrison’s address to the Australian Christian Conference goes down in the annals of history, Strewth thought it was worth noting the roll call of his closest religious confidants who received honours. There’s “Brother Stuie”, Employment Minister Stuart Robert, who prayed with Morrison ahead of the Liberal Party meeting where he became leader. And “Brother Matt”, WA Liberal senator Matt O’Sullivan, a recent addition to the PM’s “band of Christian believers in Canberra”. And Brian Houston, founder of Hillsong and Morrison’s spiritual mentor. “You Brian … just pay you honour, mate,” the Prime Minister said. “God bless you.” Strewth can confirm Houston is still being investigated by NSW police, accused of covering up the crimes of his pedophile father, Frank Houston. The Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sex Abuse found Houston failed to report alleged child sex abuse by his father to police and wrote a $100,000 cheque to an alleged victim, which he did not disclose to the church. Sources say 67-year-old Houston has refused to be interviewed by police. However, he did tell the royal commission that “we may never know” how many children his father abused. Morrison spoke fondly of Houston to the 2000-strong ACC crowd at the Gold Coast conference last month, saying he remembered the pastor preaching “Use what God has put in your hand … to do what God has put in your heart”. The PM continued: “I remember when you said that, that night out at Homebush. And I think that has been a great blessing. Blessed to be a blessing, that’s another one. Amazing impact. Best is yet to come, is that right? That’s right.”

Faithbook

Avid readers may recall Houston was also the subject of some diplomatic dialogue when it was revealed Morrison pushed the Trump administration to invite him to an official White House state dinner — a fact the Prime Minister spend months denying and dismissing as “gossip”. Team Trump ultimately refused to add Houston to the list. Morrison’s office didn’t answer Strewth’s inquiries about his recent speech but when asked last year on 2GB whether he knew Houston was under investigation by NSW police, the PM replied: “These are not things I follow closely. All I know is that (Hillsong is) a very large and very well attended and well-supported organisation here in Australia. And, you know, they are very well known in the United States, are so well known that Brian was actually at the White House a few months after I was. So the President obviously didn’t have an issue with it. And that’s why I think that’s where the matter rests.”

"When America is strong, the world is a better place. What a great opportunity it's been to see some of the initiatives that are happening to help freedom of religion." @BrianCHoustonpic.twitter.com/NAzBDsFF9t

— The White House 45 Archived (@WhiteHouse45) December 9, 2019

Idle hands

What did the notorious Noosa Temple of Satan make of ScoMo practising the Pentecostal tradition of “laying on of hands” … often without the knowledge of the recipient? Brother Samael Demo-Gorgon (aka founder and former Sex Party candidate Robin Bristow) provided Strewth with this exclusive statement: “Brother Samael reassures all Satanists that they are protected by the Evil One from any physical advances made by Pentecostals. He again invites Scott Morrison to attend the Noosa Temple of Satan’s annual Black Mass this Halloween with his speech to be made public. With politics and religion now mixing so freely, Brother Samael wonders if now is the best time for a satanic representative in Canberra.”

Melinda Dates

The Gates’s marriage has always had BDE — big divorce energy. Often there’s one small detail about a public figure that sticks with Strewth for years. In Bill Gates’s case, it was the fact he’d managed to negotiate into his marriage an annual beach house holiday with his former girlfriend Ann Winblad. In Time magazine’s 1997 article In Search of the Real Bill Gates, Walter Isaacson writes: “Gates has an arrangement with his wife that he and Winblad can keep one vacation tradition alive. Every spring, as they have for more than a decade, Gates spends a long weekend with Winblad at her beach cottage on the Outer Banks of North Carolina, where they ride dune buggies, hang-glide and walk on the beach. ‘We can play putt-putt while discussing biotechnology,’ Gates says. Winblad puts it more grandly. ‘We share our thoughts about the world and ourselves,’ she says. ‘And we marvel about how, as two young over-achievers, we began a great adventure on the fringes of a little-known industry and it landed us at the centre of an amazing universe.’ ”

Melinda and Bill Gates.

Bluetooth fairy

In these days of social distancing, reporters are oft given the option of dialling into public health press conferences instead of attending in person. A simple enough system, unless the public servants forget the power. “I suspect that this phone has died,” professor John Skerritt correctly diagnosed at 1:56pm during the Therapeutic Goods Administration’s Thursday update. “So I’m not sure that we can get any of the folks on the phone unless they want to phone individually.” Is it any wonder the vaccine rollout has been such a dismal disaster?

Professor John Skerritt.

Well, howzat?

Nationals deputy David Littleproud tried his hand at a magic flipper on Thursday, in a bid to spin the cricketing war of words over the India flight ban. “Michael Slater needs to get over himself. He is acting like a spoilt prat,” Littleproud bowled up. A feisty response to the former batsman’s suggestion that the Prime Minister hop on Shark One and “witness dead bodies on the street”. Littleproud had another shot: “Michael Slater can sit on the beach and slam us over here in Australia. These are tough decisions and we’re very empathetic with not only Australians there but also those thousands of Indians that are dying every day. But this is a pandemic that he knew he was travelling in. Yes, we granted him authority to travel. But there’s a thing called personal responsibility. So take some personal responsibility. He actually has the resources to look after himself.” What’s next? Shane Warne debating hotel quarantine with Greg Hunt?

☣️ As COVID-safe as it gets …

🏏 Brett Lee and Neroli Meadows are prepared for the task to start their journey from India. 😷

📸 @Neroli_Meadows#IPL#IPL2021pic.twitter.com/xGQIdvCy1P

— ABC SPORT (@abcsport) May 5, 2021

Sweet dreams

Hey Josh Frydenberg, how many sleeps until the budget? It’s a question Strewth is sure many fiscal fans have been texting the Treasurer as they desperately try to calculate how many days, hours, minutes and seconds until he takes to the stage (read: dispatch box) next week. Well, ask and ye shall receive! Treasury’s tech team has added a countdown clock to the homepage of budget.gov.au. And yet, no countdown to when the budget will be Back in Black.

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