With this mortgage I thee wed: young choose home ownership over marriage

Tying the knot is less of a priority for young people today than homeownership for many young people feeling the heat of housing affordability.

Nathan Pizzi and Danielle Veivers at their newly purchased townhouse in Alderley, in Brisbane’s northern suburbs. Picture: Lyndon Mechielsen

A $500,000 mortgage over 30 years is fast becoming the commitment of choice for young ­couples, rather than marriage.

As housing affordability pressures grow and society shifts away from religion, couples are increasingly using the tens of thousands of dollars typically spent on a wedding to held build up the rapidly growing deposit they need to buy a home.

New analysis of loan application data by mortgage brokerage Lendi Group for The Weekend Australian has revealed the share of de facto purchaser pairs surged from 24 per cent to 39 per cent from 2020 to 2024; married couples slipped from 42 per cent to 33 per cent over the same period.

Lendi Group’s chief operating officer, Sebastian Watkins, said continually rising property prices were taking the romance out of the budget. “There’s a point where the commercial reality may overtake the romantic idea of getting married,” Mr Watkins said.

“The jaws of affordability continue to play through. We see a difference in wage growth versus dwelling growth. By definition, the ability to save for that deposit becomes harder every day.

“People are just being forced to delay (marriage) and stake their claim in the property market.”

The typical wedding in Australia costs $33,810, according to the latest Easy Weddings Australian Wedding Industry Report, which equates to a fifth of a standard deposit on a median home. Savings data from the major banks also shows housing is the biggest goal, with 29 per cent of ANZ customers working on their deposit, and one in five at Westpac.

It was an equation that played on the minds of Brisbane couple Danielle Veivers, 31, and Nathan Pizzi, 34. The couple recently became engaged on an overseas holiday with a gifted family ring.

The actual wedding may not happen for some time, however, with the couple recently buying a townhouse in Brisbane’s northern suburbs.

“We know we are going to get married eventually, but we wanted to make sure we ticked off buying a home, settling down, and making sure we’re financially sec­ure,” Mr Pizzi said. “One step at a time, and this was the most important thing … or we might have been pushed out of the market.”

The decision to put off or reject marriage isn’t just financial, said the Demographic’s Group co-founder Simon Kuestenmacher, particularly as Australia becomes increasingly secular.

“There’s less impetus for the population to get married, have kids, buy a house,” he said. “We’re seeing many more young people stay in ‘prolonged adolescence’ … hanging out in each stage of the life cycle for a bit longer. Young people today are also the first generation who have seen their parents get divorced at scale, yet another disincentive to marry.”

Ms Veivers said they weren’t feeling pressured to tie the knot, with travelling a higher priority.

“I’ve already got the ring,” she said. “We have made the commitment and are now investing in our future.”

“No one really cares if you ‘live in sin’ anymore, or have a baby when you’re not married.

“For a lot of Australians, at least, those beliefs are not held tightly anymore. There’s an understanding it’s about balancing personal and financial priorities.”

Even weddings aren’t immune to cost-of-living pressures, with many couples opting for longer engagements, more intimate guest lists, and DIY decorations to help bring down costs.

Easy Weddings marketing director Priya Kanniappan said there had been a rise in the number of weekday, micro, and destination weddings.

“They’re putting the actual wedding day off to save more and to set up the foundations of homeownership,” Ms Kanniappan said.

Not all commitment lasts, however, with the length of a typical mortgage outlasting the average marriage in Australia, which lasts 12.8 years.