Boomers keep flying protest flag

THE baby boomer generation is objectionable. In fact, I would go so far as to say they are revolting.

Illustration: Michael Perkins

THE baby boomer generation is objectionable. In fact, I would go so far as to say they are revolting.

But before Generations X and Y think this is a boomer bash, let me clarify by saying what I mean is that baby boomers are very much inclined to exercise their democratic right to protest.

It started with their success over Vietnam, and ever since protest power has gone to their heads.

In the 1980s boomers saved the Franklin and in the 1990s they saved our suburbs. By the 2000s the protest genre was reinvigorated by new causes: dredging the bay in Melbourne, the Traveston Dam in Queensland, to say nothing of issues like Iraq and global warming generally. And the odd thing is that whenever television news cameras pan on to protesters, the gathering is not solely comprised of dreadlocked Generation Ys, but it includes baby boomers in their 60s. This is no coincidence.

For the first time in history we have a rising pool of retirees who are educated, opinionated, organised and articulate, and who are predisposed to speak their mind. These are not shy wallflowers who don't want to make a fuss. Boomers like fuss.

Think about it. You are a 58-year-old retired school teacher who's feeling a bit lost in retirement. And then along comes a cause. The nature of the cause is irrelevant. It's a cause. We are right and "the government", "big business", let alone a gimme like a "multinational corporation", is wrong. They're just in this for votes, for profits, because they just don't get it. In fact, no need to articulate a reason for protest; all you need is the magic phrase, "they just don't get it".

And, how opportune, here's a chance to offset the effects of Relevance Deprivation Syndrome that set in within days of your farewell. Colleagues who said they'd keep in touch dropped you like a hot cake. Damn it, you were someone when you were working and now the world has moved on without you. Sigh.

But hang about, all of a sudden your phone rings. An organising committee has identified you as a person of interest. They think you're good with words. Would you come and help fight the injustice of the (insert cause here) that is being foisted upon the local community?

This dam, freeway, pipeline, housing development, whatever, will destroy the community, wreak havoc on native fauna and flora, accelerate global warming, diminish diversity (don't ask what sort of diversity; it's diversity and it's being diminished) and contribute to the obesity epidemic. And there's an extra point if you can find a link between "the cause" and the policies of George W. Bush.

Calm down people, there's a retired baby boomer coming to the rescue. The retired baby boomer chairs meetings. Everyone is impressed by their insistence on "motions" and "seconders". There are fundraisers, telephone trees, flyers and phone calls.

Especially prized are the late-night calls when something has gone awry and a minion "needs to speak to you urgently". This leads to what is known as the Exquisite Spousal Exchange: "Who was that, dear?" "Oh, that was Barry. Apparently the minister wants to meet with us in the morning."

I'm sorry, but it doesn't get any better than this for a retired baby boomer. It's the feeling of being needed. It's the feeling that you are sufficiently important that a minister wants to meet with you. Oh, be still my pounding boomer heart. And then there's the piece de resistance, the maraschino cherry on top of the protest dessert -- the prospect of getting your head on tele. How good is this?

Bugger bowls. I'm protesting when I retire. I want the fellowship of the protest, the camaraderie, the esprit de corps, as well as the satisfying notion that I think I am making a difference.

I pity politicians, bureaucrats, big business and others trying to get things done next decade, because they are against not just impassioned and informed community groups, but an entire movement of retired baby boomers looking for an excuse. They may be retired, but they are rebels looking for a cause.

Bernard Salt is a KPMG partner; [e-mail];  www.twitter.com/bernardsalt