It is a truth universally acknowledged by Column 8 readers that passive aggression will have absolutely no effect on seat hogs (C8), so going all Paddington Bear on them and giving them a hard stare is doomed to fail. Marian Lorrison of Northbridge finds that “simply sitting down and telling them to move over” works for her, while Gerhard Engleitner of Hurstville relates that his “(quite short) wife just looks at them and, with teacher tone, says, ‘Move’. Oh, how they jump!”
Given that Jeff was probably sensibly avoiding confrontation with what Paul Keir of Strathfield calls “people in goblin mode, who are deliberately rejecting social norms or expectations”, Kelvin O’Keefe of Rozelle suggests, “asking for the seat (C8) usually works. This need not be polite. The next step is to request official assistance. There is a small, but appreciable, risk of uncontrolled escalation so make sure you know where the emergency assist button is.”
For something different, you can always give this seasonally adjusted solution to seat hogs (C8) from Joy Cooksey of Harrington a burl. “A loud rendition of the Hallelujah chorus may be the tactic needed to get the ‘two passengers on four seats’ to stand up so a couple of others could be seated.”
Owen Ferguson of Marrickville believes he has the answer to the Bunnings sausage sizzle (C8) question. “A few years ago I helped my mum at the sausage sizzle at South Nowra Bunnings on a Sunday morning. To my surprise, first thing in the morning, there were many people who turned up in the carpark, bought a breakfast sanga (or two) and hopped straight back in their car with absolutely no intention of entering the store. Cheaper than a McMuffin, perhaps?”
Confirming this, Anne Cloak of Bargo has never forgotten to buy what she wanted inside Bunnings (C8), “but I have been known to call in just to buy lunch on my way somewhere else. Just to support the serving charity. Of course.”
“With the horrific aftermath of floods, one small bridge over a creek near Bookham is so badly damaged people can’t drive over it,” writes Mary Julian of Glebe. “This means the delicious Binalong Duffys pies supplied to Barney’s Bookham cafe were nearly history. Now, the pies are left tenuously in the middle of the bridge and at some stage picked up from the other side. No birds, kangaroos or horses have as yet discovered them.”
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