Grammys 2023 as it happened: Beyonce becomes most awarded artist in history

And so, like an 8-minute DJ Khaled performance (weird way to end this thing, but okay), I’m tired.

You come in with such optimism to these things, hoping that for once the Grammys will do the right thing, award through merit and accurately represent the cultural zeitgeist, and then you hear the words “album of the year” and “Harry Styles” in the same sentence. I know some of you love Harry, so I’ll stop. But really, I won’t ever stop.

Thank you for joining us on this live blog for a typically ridiculous Grammys. I’m off to find a portal to a parallel universe where these awards actually make sense.

Well, there it is. A bag-grab of winners for the year’s top prizes, when everything was pointing to a Beyonce sweep. Sure, she broke the all-time winning record, but again got shut out of the main awards. In 2017, it was Adele who got in the way, and today it was Harry Styles.

I mean, Styles seems nice and his closing speech putting a dent into the idea of competition between artists seemed sincere, but I have ears and a brain and there’s no way Harry’s House deserves the title of album of the year over Renaissance. But like I said, this is the joy of the Grammys - they’re never not ridiculous.

Let the arguments begin.

You shouldn’t believe it, but this is the Grammys so, I mean, what can you do but laugh. In a monumental upset, Harry Styles has beat out Beyonce for the ultimate prize.

“Shit. Well, shit,” he says.

Harry Styles served a combination of diverse looks at this year’s Grammys.Credit: Getty

“I think on a night like tonight, it’s important to remember there’s no such thing as a best,” he adds.

I’m waiting for the apology to Beyonce, but it’s not coming. The Grammys screw her again, on what was her record-breaking night.

Last year’s best new artist Olivia Rodrigo is here to present this year’s trophy, and it goes to Samara Joy, a Bronx-born jazz singer who I’m sure you know so much about.

Samara Joy accepting an award at the 65th annual Grammy Awards.Credit: AP Photo/Chris Pizzello

I mean, it could’ve been Maneskin. This is probably way better.

Coldplay’s Chris Martin, looking like he just finished doing some busking outside, announces the winner for record of the year - and it’s another upset. It goes to Lizzo for About Damn Time.

I mean, I don’t think anyone’s complaining, but I don’t think even Lizzo’s grandparents would’ve picked it.

“This is so unexpected,” she says, before dedicating the award to Prince and the power of positive music. “Stay true to yourself because I promise you will attract people who will believe in you and support you.”

Lizzo performs a medley at the 65th annual Grammy Awards.Credit: AP Photo/Chris Pizzello

She also told Beyonce “you changed my life”, and shared a story about skipping class to see the singer perform live.

“You clearly are the artist of our lives.”

I don’t know why we even pretend to understand the Grammys.

It’s taken a while, including countless shots of Ben Affleck looking like JLo dragged him to her nephew’s christening, but we’re finally at the important awards.

America’s First Lady Jill Biden is tasked with announcing the winner of the song of the year, and it goes to Bonnie Raitt for Just Like That. Even Bonnie Raitt doesn’t understand what’s happening.

Bonnie Raitt accepts the award for song of the year for Just Like That at the 65th annual Grammy Awards. First Lady Jill Biden looks on from right.Credit: AP Photo/Chris Pizzello

“I’m so surprised, I don’t know what to say,” the 73-year-old says. It’s a song about organ donation, she explains, which was inspired by her late friend John Prine.

The blues and country great has a history of political activism, dating back to anti-Vietnam and anti-nuclear anthems when she started back in the ’70s.

“I don’t write a lot of songs, but I’m so pleased you appreciate this one,” she adds.

I know mainstream American country music gets a bad rap, but c’mon, this jangly number from country superstar Luke Combs makes me wanna put on some blue jeans, fill up the tank in my Toyota Corolla, and drive down the south coast blasting Kix FM. You can’t beat a fiddle and a drawl, and lyrics about trains/whiskey.

Luke Combs performs Going, Going, Gone at the 65th annual Grammy Awards.Credit: AP Photo/Chris Pizzello

While we wait for the last couple of awards to be announced, here’s a stunning photo of Harry Styles on stage belting out his nominated track As It Was.

Harry Styles belting out his song As It Was on stage at the Grammys.Credit: AP Photo/Chris Pizzello

The silver, tinsel-y number is much more fun than the rainbow jumpsuit, according to our in-house Grammys brains trust.

The Rock is here talking about his favourite songs and his own horrible vocal chops, and includes a sly nod to all the Moana stans out there [puts hand up]. He’s introducing the Grammy for best vocal pop solo performance and it goes to Adele.

The Rock hands Adele her 16th Grammy Award.Credit: AP Photo/Chris Pizzello

She thanks her son Angelo, her partner Rich Paul (aka Lebron’s agent), and then gets bleeped out heavily because she’s Adele.

LL Cool J has presented a “global impact award” to Dr Dre, an award that shall henceforth bear his name.

The whole thing segued into Questlove’s tribute to the 50th anniversary of hip-hop, which leaned heavily on the pioneers. It was a veritable retirement home of rappers - I say this with affection.

Chuck D and Flavor Flav perform “Rebel Without a Pause” in the tribute.Credit: Invision

There was LL, Run DMC, Salt n Pepa, Rakim, Chuck D and Flav, Posdnous of De La Soul, Scarface of the Geto Boys, Ice T, Queen Latifah doing U.N.I.T.Y, and I don’t think we’re even at 1993 by this point.

Then there’s Method Man, Busta Rhymes and Missy Elliott bringing us into the new millennium, and even Shania Twain is on her feet.

Ice-T performs New Jack Hustler (Nino’s Theme).Credit: Invision

Questlove has gone all out - then we’ve got Nelly doing Hot in Herre, Too Short doing Blow the Whistle, Jadakiss and Styles P doing We Gon Make It, and all of a sudden we’re at today with Glorilla doing FnF and Lil Uzi Vert on stage with his Naruto haircut doing his new Jersey Club anthem Just Wanna Rock. I feel like I’m at RnB Superclub and I love it.

“Multigenerational hip-hop!” yells LL when the whole thing ends, which is also something I yell at my kids.

Sandra Denton and Cheryl James of Salt-N-Peppa perform My Mic Sounds Nice.Credit: Invision