Clara had two reasons not to date soccer star Katrina Gorry – now they’re engaged

Matildas midfielder Katrina Gorry, 32, was a new mum when she met striker Clara Markstedt, 35, in Sweden in 2022. The pair live in London, where Gorry captains West Ham, with their daughter, Harper, 3, and nine-month-old son, Koby.

Katrina Gorry (left) and Clara Markstedt. “I’d just look at her picture [on Tinder] and then close the app, without swiping left or right,” says Markstedt.Credit: John Davis

Clara: I started messaging Mini on Instagram before we actually met. She was coming to play for my team – Vittsjo GIK – in Sweden, and I was basically the person who helped welcome foreigners to the club, because of my English and social skills.

I thought it was amazing that she was 29, alone with her six-month-old baby through IVF and moving to the other side of the world to play football. She flew into Umea, which is in the north of Sweden, and it was really cold; snow was still on the ground. The self check-in at the hotel wouldn’t work and I got really angry, but she was just standing there holding Harper with such calm energy. I would have been so much more anxious about everything.

I soon saw that she was on Tinder, but I had a vision that I wasn’t going to date foreigners – because they eventually leave – or date someone on my team – because you have to see them every day. Still, I was drawn to her as a person, so I’d just look at her picture and then close the app, without swiping left or right.

‘When Katrina bought a nice coffee-maker and a Dyson vacuum, we were pretty much set in stone.’

Clara Markstedt

Eventually, I made it really clear that I liked her; I was quite flirty. I asked her on a date and soon we went away together and, after that, she moved in with me – as a trial. When she bought a nice coffee-maker and a Dyson vacuum, we were pretty much set in stone.

Mini always questioned whether she’d marry, but we were talking about it within six months. On a trip to Hamilton Island, she said, “I asked you to be my girlfriend, so if marriage is going to happen, you’re going to have to be the one to propose.” I started planning, and she said yes.

The lead-up to the 2023 FIFA Women’s World Cup [hosted by Australia and NZ] was amazing. I was there watching the group stage and the energy was incredible. I barely saw Mini, but I remember Harper with her painted face screaming when she saw her mum on the big screen.

Unfortunately, I had to go home to Sweden for preseason before the finals, and my dad died suddenly while I was there. It was so unexpected and devastating. I think it was difficult for Mini not being able to be there for me, too. She couldn’t sleep and needed the team psychologist. When I flew back to Australia to see her, being reunited was so special. That hug. I needed it. I felt like I could finally breathe out.

We’d already planned the transfer of one of Mini’s frozen embryos for me in Norway, which we did a few days before my dad’s funeral, a few weeks after he died. I was crying and emotional – irrationally angry for his sudden disappearance – and thinking, “I’m heartbroken. You need to make up for this: make this embryo stick.” I woke up the next day, did a test and there was a faint line. I like to think he had something to do with the birth of Koby and the making of our family.

My father had great intuition, which is why he became a vet – because he could sense things – and he always said about Mini, “I have a great feeling about her.”

Katrina: The first contact I had with Clara was her messaging me in Australia, offering to help me settle in Sweden. She chose my apartment for me. She took care of my parking. Being from Queensland, we barely owned a jumper, so Clara organised winter clothes for Harper through a teammate. She helped out in so many small ways, even holding Harper on the bus for an away game so I could rest.

On the field, we were on the wrong page all the time! I’d play the ball on her feet while she was running behind. It took a few months to get that understanding but, eventually, I put a ball over the top and she just ran on to it and finished the goal, and we ended up with a really great connection.

I was oblivious to the fact that she was flirting with me; my focus was on Harper. But we started hanging out and it just felt so normal. We were both so open about our lives and it seemed really easy. We spent 10 days with her family on the island where she grew up – Gotland – and honestly, it was the best 10 days I’ve ever had. Everything was so full of love.

‘She’s also great because she’s not a football nerd. It’s nice to come home to that, so it all gets left on the pitch.’

Katrina Gorry

When I was 13, I always said I wanted to be a single mum, which is a strange thing to say, but my parents divorced when I was quite young and it was hard. So I said to Clara, “I won’t propose, but if you propose, I’ll say yes.” I knew she was my person.

Clara knows what it takes to get there in football – the worries you have about injury, and how everything can be taken away in a moment – so she was an amazing support going into the World Cup. She’s also great because she’s not a football nerd. It’s nice to come home to that, so it all gets left on the pitch. She was the calm before the storm.

When her father died, she was so far away. I knew she had a great support system with people who would drop everything to help her, but I felt so helpless. When she finally got back for the last few games of the World Cup, it was so special to have her there – and to play for her dad. When I scored my penalty [during Australia’s quarter-final win over France], I had his name written on my wrist.
I remember waking up on the day of his funeral – after her embryo transfer – and saying to Clara, “Your boobs look big; you might be pregnant”, and she was. They say when someone special leaves, someone special arrives and, in that moment, we knew her dad was going to guide us through whatever came next.

When I got the chance to play for West Ham in London last year, there was never any doubt in Clara’s mind we’d go; nothing fazes her. It was a new adventure for us, to start our own family and life together. We’ve never had a disagreement on how to parent; we share the workload. Some days it’s 50-50, other days it’s 70-30, but it’s never a competition. We’re the best team.

Katrina Gorry, by Katrina Gorry with Robert Wainwright (Allen & Unwin; $35), is out June 3.

[e-mail]

To read more from Good Weekend magazine, visit our page at The Sydney Morning Herald, The Age and Brisbane Times.