Q&A recap: Attention seekers take over for trainwreck TV

Monday night's Q&A was essentially a nationally televised support group for attention seekers, a gang who still managed to end the program feeling nearly 90 minutes of airtime wasn't enough to fully encompass their genius.

If only people really appreciated them for who they really are. (Programming note: the show would have run till dawn.)

This went for the audience members as much as for the panel, but let's start with the invited guests.

The star of the show was the philosopher with three names - Notorious Jordan Peterson - who modestly resisted being addressed simply as Notorious and appeared using his middle name. Peterson is famous for being a Canadian who annoys the living hell out of people, which is not a national trait but one he has mastered through persistence.

Also present was the Australian gadfly introduced under her full name, Twitter Queen Van Badham, who modestly allowed herself to be addressed as Van rather than Queen; the Liberal MP Alex Hawke, who you can find in the timber aisle at Bunnings - for sale, not browsing; the Labor MP Terri Butler; and Catherine McGregor, whose experiences as a transgender woman, cricket tragic and political and military advisor don't quite prepare you for her skills as a stand-up comedian.

Controversial psychologist Jordan Peterson.Credit: ABC

To McGregor went the zinger of the night, as she endeavoured to break bread with her panel neighbour Peterson.

"I bought your book by the way, and you're outselling Shane Warne… That delights me in two ways because no-one has more bleached blonde hair or has had more work done than I. But Warnie is a close second."

This was a great line, and also offered pause for thought: thank God Warnie wasn't present. That much self-regard in one room might have caused the program to spontaneously combust.

This is not to say it was a bad show.

Attention-seeking is a good and bad thing on television, but mostly good. Even as the program threatened to run so long that you thought Tony Jones would be hosting the end of it from Beijing in 2020, you couldn't take your eyes off it. Even when your ears were bleeding.

Cate McGregor, Peterson and Terri Butler on Q&A.Credit: ABC

Peterson, the lightning rod for the evening whose appearance had prompted everyone who never watches Q&A to not watch it again, is a curious fellow. He has the countenance of a second-hand couch, the allure of Jesus in a crumpet, and the snarl of a casserole that gave you food poisoning.

His main schtick? As expressed in the opening question: "People, particularly young men, appear to regard you and look to you as a saviour."

Tony Jones: "Jordan Peterson? Welcome to Australia."

Peterson: "I think the idea that the West is fundamentally an oppressive patriarchy is an appalling idea."

And so it went. Immediately downhill.

Q&A cannily recognised that no Attention Seekers Support Group would be complete without a contribution from Milo Yiannopoulos. There is neither the time nor inclination to explain Milo here, you can look him up. Suffice it to say, Milo had a beef with Notorious Jordan and had sent in a video question to pursue it.

"Can you explain why, although you talk a good game about standing up against social justice warriors and the chaotic feminine, but when it comes down to it you always seem to either fold, stay silent or betray your allies?"

Notorious Jordan sort of apologised for whatever offence he had caused, then attempted to engage Milo. But Milo wasn't there.

Jones: "We're not going to hear back from him. Just video."

Notorious Jordan: "I thought he was live."

Viewer: "Thank God for small mercies."

The debate went on. Alex Hawke was concerned that political correctness was shutting down debate, and that he - a federal government minister given nearly 90 minutes to talk on a national television program - was being silenced.

"We can't even discuss this topic in today's environment," he said, miraculously discussing the very topic he said could not be discussed.

"I think that's a big problem."

Questioners threw their grenades - some in support of Notorious Jordan, like the man who believed anyone opposed to "the socialists/PC/Greens/Communist brigade are shouted down literally and called racists/homophobic, so that any form of rational debate is difficult if not impossible to have".

Some were in opposition, as with the questioner who wondered if addressing trans people by their preferred pronouns was about "something as fundamental as respect".

Through it all, Peterson eventually showed himself to be a man prone to wrapping himself in his own well-fitting identity pants: Crankyman.

In a clash with Terri Butler on quotas, he was visibly agitated.

Butler: "Maybe that's just about having proper equality in a body that's meant to be representative?"

Notorious Jordan: "I do believe women should have… I don't understand your question, I guess."

Butler: "I guess you don't. That's pretty obvious, unfortunately."

Peterson, raising his voice: "How about you phrase it more clearly instead of just insulting me? Look, look, look, look at it this way…"

After saying "look" four times, he asked of Butler: "99.9 per cent of bricklayers are men. Should we have quotas for women?"

Butler: "Is bricklaying representative democracy?"

Peterson: "That has nothing to do with the question."

Look, look, look, look. Notorious Jordan is currently on a national tour, and will be mansplaining the world for a price at a venue near you.