Elly Miles reveals STI diagnosis and why she kept it ‘hidden’ from men
A popular Aussie reality star has revealed she’s been living “in silent” with a condition caught from sexual contact – but is no longer ashamed.
Health
Don't miss out on the headlines from Health. Followed categories will be added to My News.
An Australian reality star has revealed she has an incurable sexually transmitted infection – and is calling for “stigma” surrounding the common condition to end.
Bachelor star Elly Miles has revealed she is living with genital herpes after contracting the disease from an ex-boyfriend.
Around one in every eight sexually active Australian adults has genital herpes according to Health Direct.
There are two strains of the infection which can cause blisters or ulcers through skin to skin contact.
HSV-1 presents more commonly as cold sores on the lips or face but can be transmitted through oral sex, and HSV-2, which is spread by sexual contact.
The HSV virus is most easily spread when there are blisters or sores, but it can sometimes be passed even if a person has no active blisters, sores or other symptoms.
There’s no cure for the infection, meaning you carry the virus for life.
Miles said she “picked it up” from a former boyfriend and has “hidden” it from others ever since – even revealing she hasn’t disclosed it when having sex with new partners.
“I have genital herpes and it’s something that I picked up from an ex in my 20s. It’s something I’ve tucked away and hidden and carried a lot of shame around,” she explained on the latest episode of the Reclaiming Love podcast.
“There is just so much stigma attached to it, right, in society. People make so many jokes about it.
“I think the perception of what it is, is so incredibly blown out of proportion to what the experience is like.
“Yet, I allowed myself to remain silent about it for a long, long time.”
The 30-year-old mindfulness coach, who has been sober for over a year, went on to explain she kept her diagnosis from sexual partners after being advised to by her doctor.
“I asked if I should be telling people, and the doctor said, ‘it’s so common’ but warned that if it is ‘active’ then I shouldn’t have sex,” she claimed.
However, her stance on this has since evolved after she was left wracked with “guilt and shame”, with Miles stating she always discloses the information before any sexual contact.
“A part of the journey to fighting the shame is to ‘own it’,” she explained.
“I had kept that part of me in the dark for so long... but it’s so normal and common.”
The revelation, which Miles shared on TikTok and Instagram with followers, has attracted a huge amount of support – though some were shocked she didn’t disclose the medical diagnosis to partners initially.
“You should be telling partners. Absolutely morally wrong not to,” raged one.
“That’s awful advice from your doctor. If you have unprotected sex you have a moral responsibility to tell the person so they can make an informed choice,” another shared.
As one declared: “I would be livid if someone knowingly had genital herpes and had unprotected sex with me without telling me. That should be disclosed to every single person you’re intimate with. That is how this is spread so much!”
Confusion surrounding herpes transmission stems from the fact that both HSV-1 and HSV-2 can infect both oral and genital areas.
Another key factor leaving sufferers muddled is that people can shed the herpes virus, meaning it’s contagious, even when they don’t have visible sores or symptoms. This makes it difficult to know when someone is infectious and at risk of transmission.
Miles said she has been “overwhelmed” by the support from fans.
“The amount of messages I am getting from people saying, ‘thank you for speaking out about this’ is why I did it,” she explained on Instagram Stories on Thursday evening.
“I love that so many people are feeling seen. I’ll be honest, I am a little bit overwhelmed by it, but it’s such a beautiful response and I am so grateful.”
Miles is currently single, but her dating life has had moments in the spotlight after she came fifth in Matt Agnew’s Bachelor season, and later went on to become a joint Bachelorette alongside sister Becky,
She found love with tradie Frazer Neate following the 2020 spin off of the cult dating show, but the pair split shortly after.
News.com.au has contacted Miles for further comment.
More Coverage
Originally published as Elly Miles reveals STI diagnosis and why she kept it ‘hidden’ from men
Why I’m not telling anyone the name of my baby
In this chapter of Imogen’s pregnancy diary she reveals how her baby shower went and also why she’s keeping her son’s name a secret until he is born.
Full List: Shock safety scores of aged care homes revealed
Aged care residents have revealed how safe they feel in their facility, with people in more than 200 Australian homes claiming they ‘never feel safe’. See where and how yours rates.