‘I was 19 and fell for 51-year-old man’
Vanessa Szabo met her much older husband at school – but they couldn’t be happier despite their age gap.
Vanessa Szabo fell for a man 32 years older than her. Here, she tells her own story in her own words …
Looking at my parents I nervously cleared my throat.
“Mum, Dad,” I said, voice shaking. “I’ve been seeing someone.”
Mum’s face lit up at the news.
My heart sank. I knew that what I was about to say would come as a huge shock to them both.
My boyfriend Geza wasn’t just any guy. He was 32 years older than me.
I’d met him just a few months before, and it definitely hadn’t been love at first sight.
I was 19 and in my final year at school when Mr Szabo walked into my PE lesson.
He wasn’t our teacher, he was a brilliant table-tennis player and there to play in a tournament with us.
As I stood there, paddle in hand, I was determined to win.
So I was thrilled when I beat him, and smiled when I saw the grumpy look on his face.
He’s pretty full of himself! I thought.
But when he messaged me a few days later to organise the medal I’d won, he was really kind.
He asked about my exam revision, which in truth was really stressing me out. I felt like I could be honest with him.
Not great! I typed.
That’s when he started offering tips and advice, and it was a huge help with my exams.
That summer, once I’d left school, I signed up for his tennis lessons. He was funny and kind, as well as being a great teacher.
But I was 19 and, I’d already learnt that he was 51.
I’d never fancied older men before and he was old enough to be my dad. Divorced, he had two daughters who were older than me.
Our lives were so different.
By now, I’d left school and was both studying to be a dental nurse and doing work experience at a clinic.
I was still 19, and starting out in life. So why was I sensing something growing between us?
“This is crazy,” I thought, pushing the feelings away.
Then a few days later as we took a break from our lesson, Geza looked at me seriously.
“Vanessa,” he said. “I think there’s a spark here.”
All I could do was laugh.
It took a few days for me to admit to myself that he was right. I nervously typed out a message to him, confessing how I was feeling.
I do really like you, I wrote. Moments later came his reply, I like you too.
His words made me smile.
A few days later I was excited and anxious as I walked into our first date at a local restaurant.
It was a lovely evening, but we both spoke honestly about what it would mean to be in a relationship.
Geza was worried that people would think I was only with him for money. His concern for me made me like him even more.
“I know that people will talk about us,” I replied calmly. “But this isn’t about me dating just any older man. This is about you.”
We had every right to be together, and that’s what we both wanted.
So, we started dating, although keeping our relationship hidden seemed like the sensible thing to do.
We were careful, always going out on the other side of town so we weren’t spotted. Our feelings grew and soon we were in love.
But the secrecy and the worry put pressure on both of us. We each ended things more than once but couldn’t keep away from each other.
Our connection wasn’t like anything I’d felt with guys I’d dated before. This was the real thing.
That’s when I knew I had to tell my parents – and my mum’s lit up face fell, and she and Dad were both really upset.
They worried Geza might be seeing other women my age, which I knew wasn’t the case.
I stood strong though, determined to be with the man I loved.
A year later Geza took me to Paris and proposed at the top of the Eiffel Tower.
“Yes!” I said, as happy tears fell.
In January 2020, as we were still planning the wedding, I discovered I was pregnant.
I was thrilled, knowing Geza’s age and experience would make him an even more amazing dad.
Our gorgeous son Henrik was born in August 2020, and just two days later Geza and I said our vows.
It was incredible to be husband and wife, and a family of three. My family were there, and we each had a few friends attend.
It was such a happy day – and one I’d never ever imagined when Geza walked into my PE class that day!
Four years after we began dating, I know that falling in love with a 32-year age gap hasn’t been easy but so what if our love story is a little different? Geza is my soulmate.
Age truly doesn’t matter when you’re perfect for one other.
Geza, 53, says:
I was shocked to develop feelings for Vanessa, and even tried to keep us apart. But it was impossible.
Now we’re writing a book about our age-gap relationship and look forward to a very happy future together.