Psychologist explains TikTok trend mocking Tinder Swindler victims

The women duped by conman Simon Leviev have become the centre of a dark TikTok trend that sees them lashed and mocked online.

Despite falling prey to a calculated con-artist, the female victims of Simon Leviev have now become targets of a dark new TikTok trend.

Countless videos mocking the women, including Cecilie Fjellhoy who was conned out of around $349,000 in a matter of weeks by the “Tinder Swindler”, have emerged on the social media platform since the Netflix doco first aired on February 2.

The unsympathetic TikTok videos label the victims as “dumb”, “stupid” and “gullible”, while projecting an air of superiority, often stating: “This would never happen to me”.

But let’s be clear, the women are none of the things these videos suggest.

In a cruel twist, the women have become victims for a second time – this time to the patriarchy that tells them it’s their responsibility to protect themselves from abuse rather than holding the male perpetrator accountable, says Australian clinical psychologist Rachel Samson.

The Tinder Swindler documentary details the cons and cruelty of fake international playboy Simon Leviev. Picture: Netflix

But his victims, including Cecilie Fjellhoy pictured, are now copping a second round of abuse. Picture: Netflix

Australian clinical psychologist Rachel Samson explains why people are blaming the victims of the ‘Tinder Swindler’. Picture: Instagram

“Female victims of cybercrimes face a double layer of victim blaming: we live in a society that has historically blamed women who experience abuse, such as sexual abuse and domestic violence, and we assign blame to any victims of cybercrimes,” she told news.com.au.

“Unfortunately, cybercrimes are generally poorly understood by society. This is especially true of ‘love scams’.

“There are negative stereotypes associated with being a victim of ‘love scams’, for example, victims may be seen as ‘naive’, ‘gullible’, and ‘desperate’ which contribute to victims being blamed and mocked rather than supported.”

However, research suggests that those who are more highly educated may be at greater risk of becoming a victim of ‘love scams’, highlighting that the stereotypes society hold of victims are inaccurate and unhelpful, Dr Samson explains.

Videos have emerged mocking the women conned from thousands of dollars. Picture: TikTok

Some claim they dated Leviev, bragging they ‘didn’t give him money’. Picture: TikTok

The 2018 study that determined this did so by comparing victims of romance scams to people who have fallen foul of the most common scam type, mass-marketing fraud.

As well as finding that love scam victims were often “well-educated women”, it also argued against “gullibility” instead stating individuals were more trusting.

“Anyone can be the victim of ‘catfishing’ or ‘love scams’,” Dr Samson, who runs a clinic in South Australia, stresses.

“Further research in this area is needed to more deeply understand what characteristics make someone more susceptible to these crimes.

“The research that is available shows that those who are middle-aged (as opposed to older), as well as those with a tendency toward romantic idealisation and higher impulsivity, were more likely to be victims of ‘love scams’ (also known as ‘romance fraud’).”

Others acted out ways they would tell him ‘no’ if he had targeted them. Picture: TikTok

While some just brutally mocked the women’s plight. Picture: TikTok

Despite this, hordes of videos with millions of views have emerged online. The contents of the nasty clips include women claiming they dated Leviev but didn’t give him any money, describing the move as their “biggest flex”.

Others shared sketches showing their swift “no” when asked to hand over cash to protect their boyfriend from his “enemies” – a line Leviev used to pilpher money from his victims.

Many more created videos on the topic to the song Crazy by Gnarls Barkley.

Commenters were equally as unsupportive of the victims, calling them “dumb”, “stupid” and “gullible”.

“This has to be the financial version of natural selection,” one particularly mean comment read.

“She deserved it,” another read.

However, these victim-blaming attitudes are extremely “harmful” and stem from a historical patriarchal societal model where women are classed as the “lesser” sex, Dr Samson explained.

“Men are seen as independent, strong, logical, and unemotional, while women are dependent, emotional, caring, and weak,” she said.

“These gender stereotypes influence the way we live, including the way we make sense of the world around us.

“Often, gender stereotypes are used to normalise male-perpetrated violence against women.

“Rather than men having been held accountable for perpetrating violence and other forms of abuse, our society has historically sent women the message that it is their responsibility to protect themselves from being the victim of abuse.

“This harmful attitude leads people to conclude that if a woman is the victim of abuse, she must have done something to contribute to the abuse occurring. This victim-blaming is part of what has been termed ‘rape culture’.”

Cecilie Fjellhoy considered suicide after being left in crippling debt because of Leviev’s scheme. Picture: Joshua Wilks/Netflix

Maria Konnikova, a psychologist and best-selling author of The Confidence Game, explained the reason people were so quick to judge is because we were “much more objective” towards others.

However we don’t apply the same scrutiny to our own lives.

“We all know that if it seems too good to be true, it is. But when it comes to ourselves, we think, ‘I deserve love’ or ‘I deserve this great opportunity to be introduced into this wonderful segment of society’,” Dr Konnikova told Harper’s Bazaar.

“So we don’t see it as ‘too good to be true’; we see as ‘what I actually deserve’.”

Leviev (L) is now said to be ‘back living the high life’ after serving five months for fraud, theft and forgery in Israel. Picture: Epa-Efe/Tore Kristiansen/VG Norway OUT

Dr Konnikova also agreed that anyone could become victim to a love scam, reminding people it is the con-artist who is to blame, despite how “charismatic” he appears.

“It’s really important to remember that con artists are nasty individuals,” she said.

“But, they’re so good at being charismatic and getting people on their side. That’s one of the reasons we like to watch them. So, it can be really difficult to show how compelling they are, and yet remain sympathetic to the victim.”

Leviev was convicted of fraud, theft, and forgery in his homeland of Israel and sentenced to 15 months in prison in December 2019. He is thought to have conned women and businesses around the world out of more than £7 million ($A13.3 million).

He served five months before he was released and reportedly “back living the high life”.

His victims however are struggling in the aftermath of his crimes, with 34-year-old Cecilie stating she was suicidal after being left with crippling credit card debt.