‘I met my partner at a swingers party’

Having gone to a swingers party with other people, this soon-to-be couple found they had a connection that went beyond casual sex.

Ever met someone and had a weird feeling that they would become someone special in your life? I’ve had it twice!

The first time was in a bar in Surry Hills. My best friend had just moved into a townhouse and we decided to check out the local bar. I walked in and clocked a guy behind the bar. He had piercing blue eyes, some artistic tattoos along both arms, and was tall and slightly lanky. I turned to my best friend and said, “Him! That is the man I’m going to marry!”

I had never met him before, I hadn’t even spoken to him yet, but I just got this crazy feeling he was meant for me. We had a chuckle about it and got on with our night.

Jump forward three months later, and I was at another friend’s house after a big night. We were slightly tipsy, in her kitchen cooking up pasta for a midnight snack. Suddenly we hear the front door open and she goes, “Oh that’s my new housemate, come and meet him.”

In walks the guy from behind the bar in Surry Hills and, not to sound all ‘spiritually woo woo’ but it’s like we clocked eyes and it. Was. On.

We stayed up until the early morning hours, dancing in the loungeroom, drinking red wine and having lots of laughs. For the next couple of months, we dated and it’s one of my most treasured memories.

Jana Hocking has had two chance encounters that have given her the feels. Picture: Instagram.

The second time it happened was with a guy I was working with. He worked interstate and I was still fairly new, so I had never met him before. One morning he was in town, and we were in the middle of a big work project.

He sidled up to me and said something wildly inappropriate but very funny. He had a dark sense of humour and some wicked eyes that instantly made me swoon. I remember thinking to myself, hmm … you and I are going to have some form of adventure.

Over the next couple of years, we were completely drawn to each other. Almost like each other’s drug of choice. It was wild, and fun, and a memory I will look back on when I’m in my eighties and smirk about.

So this week, after one too many swipe-lefts I got pondering. Where will my next ‘spooky meeting’ take place, because lord knows I’ve got dating app fatigue. No one is taking my fancy. I realised I so much prefer meeting someone when I least expect it.

So once again I took to my Instagram and asked the question: “Tell me the unusual unexpected place you met your significant other..” and can I just tell you, the stories I received gave me such a spark!

Love is not dead people!

I had someone who met their partner at a set of traffic lights, another who met their now-husband on an outback station in (literally) the middle of nowhere, another who met her boyfriend through flatmate finders and another who met their partner at a swingers party – yes, really!

Someone Jana knows met their partner at a swingers party. Picture: iStock.

Now I know what you’re thinking … aren’t swingers parties just for … umm … fun?! Well let’s just say it started that way. Long story short, two couples met at the party, played under the doona and then a year later when both were divorced, the guy from the one couple, and the girl from the other couple ran into each other at the supermarket (awkies) and have been dating ever since!

You may think that these are people who have the confidence to just randomly go up to someone and say “Hey!” but honestly, it’s not. Many of these meetings were slow burns. They just found unique ways to make a lasting impact.

One of my Kinda Sorta Dating podcast guests admitted that they really wanted to chat to the person who came to inspect their rental flat but didn’t know how to send them a text without it sounding creepy so they just wrote: “Hey did I just see you in Bondi?”

Spoiler alert: They hadn’t, but it was a nifty way to get a conversation going #genius.

It reminded me that, as dud and single as we might be feeling today, who’s to say we won’t meet our future soulmate tomorrow while picking up coffee. The point is, you never know when love is going to enter your life and isn’t that just a tiny bit exciting!

So put down the dating apps down (for at least a week) and get out there and live your life. Turns out it is still possible to meet people IRL, and let’s be honest, these are the best kinda stories to tell at your wedding.

Jana Hocking is a podcaster and collector of kind-of-boyfriends | @jana_hocking