Woman’s X-rated $2 Kmart pool noodle hack to stop noisy sex

The woman shared on Facebook her solution to an, ahem, “noisy” bedroom problem – and it’s been praised as the “best hack ever”.

Normally when you think of Kmart hacks, contact wrapping fridges and upcycling coffee tables spring to mind.

But one woman has shared her $2 solution to a rather, ahem, common bedroom problem – and it’s being praised as the “best hack ever”.

In a post on the Kmart Hacks & Decor Facebook page the woman revealed how she had purchased a $2 pool noodle and cut it into pieces to fit around her bedhead.

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The cheeky hack involves cutting a pool noodle to attach to your bedhead to stop any noise. Picture: Facebook.

The woman wrote that she had come up with the solution after the “teenagers in the house” started complaining of “noises in the night” due to … well, you probably know what.

“Noisy bed? Pool noodle works well,” she wrote, alongside a photo of her set-up.

Soon her post had attracted hundreds of comments from people praising it as “the best hack ever” and “so much more interesting than kitchen benches and linen cupboards”.

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“Ugh, my bed is noisy when I jump on it too! Great hack,” one person wrote, while another added: “Just snorted coffee out of my nose reading that.”

One person joked that the post would “confuse the innocent” and another said they would going to “get my pool noodle out of garage now”.

Others predicted that the $2 pool noodle could soon become the next toilet paper, with one person saying they will “never look at anyone carrying a pool noodle in Kmart the same (way) again”.

The pool noodles come in five different colours and cost just $2 – a bargain.

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“Next minute, middle of winter and sold out of pool noodles,” one person wrote, while another added: “In other news: COVID-19 has made pool noodle prices sky rocket.”

But others pointed out there was a simple solution to the problem that could avoid any awkward questions about why there was a pool noodle attached to your bed head.

“Why not just move the bed away from the wall? Sheesh,” one person wrote, while another added: “My bed’s got a space between bed head and wall for this reason.”

But most were taken with the bedroom hack, with one asking: “Who needs to go to Kmart?”

ARE AUSTRALIANS BORING IN BED?

While we might be adventurous when it comes to Kmart hacks, a recent survey has revealed our sex style might be considered a little vanilla.

A recent survey by sex toy manufacturer We-Vibe revealed Aussies dub missionary as their favourite position, with more than half of us spending the most amount of time in the bedroom using it.

“Missionary was the clear crowd favourite, with 41 per cent of respondents saying it was their favourite position, coming in ahead of doggy style at 30 per cent and cowgirl at 28 per cent,” a spokesperson said.

Sex and intimacy coach Georgia Grace. Picture: Instagram.

Sex educator and intimacy coach Georgia Grace said that while the classic position may be thought of as “vanilla”, it’s actually favoured because of how intimate it is between the two parties.

“The best sex you can have is when you feel connected and present,” Georgia told news.com.au.

“Many of the ‘funky’ positions we hear like reverse doggy and butter churner, are fun to try but they take a great amount of stamina, require strength in holding someone’s body and can be difficult to hit the right spot.

“So they’re great if want to do something different, but perhaps aren’t as pleasurable as good-ol missionary.”