‘Crying’: 30yo’s income ripped away

A young woman has revealed the reality of her income being ripped away and why the stress has reduced her to tears.

Emily hasn’t been able to work a full day for around 14 weeks now, and the financial stress has had her in tears.

“I was crying last week because I’m worried I don’t have enough for my next car payment,” she told news.com.au.

Emily, a 30-year-old mum of four, runs her own business, Melbourne’s Fine Line Tattoo, while her husband owns a plumbing company.

The reason she’s been unable to work for three months is because she suffers from endometriosis, and as a small-business owner, she doesn’t have any sick leave to fall back on.

Emily hasn’t been able to work a full day for around 14 weeks now, Picture: TikTok./em_lovergirl

She runs her own business. Picture: TikTok./em_lovergirl

The 30-year-old has recently had a hysterectomy and had her fallopian tubes and cervix removed in a last-ditch effort to try and get on top of the chronic pain.

Endometriosis is a condition where tissue similar to that which normally lines the uterus grows in other parts of the body, usually the pelvic region. It can cause chronic pain and, for many, can result in infertility issues.

Research by the Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (AIHW) showed in 2023 that about 1 in 7 women are diagnosed with the “historically under-recognised” condition by age 40 to 44.

The recovery process has been slow, though. She caught a gastro bug from one of her kids post-surgery, and she ended up splitting her stitches during that bout with sickness.

The setback has meant she is constantly in pain which means she can’t work and then she’s stuck in a vicious cycle of being stressed about money.

She’s been living in chronic pain her entire life. Picture: TikTok./em_lovergirl

She’s having a slow recovery process. Picture: TikTok./em_lovergirl

Today, she saw her first client because she desperately “needed the money so badly”, and during set-up for her second client, she realised her pain was so bad that she was developing a tremor in her hand, making it impossible to do her job.

She had to cancel her second client, even though she needed the money.

“When I’ve been working normally, I can make between $4000 to $5000 per week, and I’ve been trying to get back to work for about five weeks now, but I’m lucky to be making $1000,” she said.

The normal amount of money she takes home may sound like a lot, but with the business’ rent and a ton of overheads, she’s just scrapping by.

It is frustrating because it isn’t due to a lack of clients, or because her business is faltering, but because she’s too sick.

“I’ve barely worked since my surgery. 14 weeks of letting down my clients and basically no money,” she explained.

“I don’t want to cry poor because there’s lots of people worse off than us, but I have not been this financially without since I started my business nine years ago.”

She feels guilty she can’t provide for her family right now. Picture: TikTok./em_lovergirl

Emily’s been living with chronic pain since she was in primary school when she experienced her first painful period; And it’s just been normal for her since.

Now at the age of 30, she wonders if part of the reason her endometriosis has worsened over the years is because of the pressure society puts on women.

“We carry the load. For our families, friends, and society, we don’t have time to rest. No one has time to look after their bodies,” she said.

Part of the reason Emily thinks she’s never found time to rest is society’s expectations. It stems back to when she told her P.E. teacher she was too sick to play sport, but she was still forced to participate.

There’s just a general lack of understanding around women’s pain, and for a long time, she tried to brush it aside and get on with it too.

“Society doesn’t allow for people to listen to women,” she said.

She wonders if part of the reason her endometriosis has worsened over the years is because of the pressure women put on themselves. Picture: TikTok./em_lovergirl

She’s realised she needed to slow down. Picture: TikTok./em_lovergirl

So Emily’s set up her whole life around managing her pain in a way that she hopes doesn’t inconvenience anyone else.

“I dunno how I could possibly work for someone else. I schedule my whole life around my pain and employers….” She said.

She’s been there and done that, she said she doesn’t have a “horrific” story to share but just the general sense that bosses found her “annoying.”

She didn’t feel that being an employee who often needs frequent time off to recover made her very popular, and it has been easier for her to work for herself.

It allowed her to manage her own chronic illness, but now, with this recovery time, she’s struggling. It is school holidays and she’s strapped for cash.

“I have anxiety; I can’t afford to take them to do anything fun, we are going to the park and going for walks and picking flowers,” she said.

“I feel guilty. I feel like a burden that I can’t help provide.”

Even though Emily believes she’s an optimistic, this recovery process has taught her she’s going to need to “slow down” and she worries about how that’ll impact her financial future.