Aussie mum refuses to let family touch baby daughter unless she gives consent

An Australian mum who refuses to let her parents kiss or cuddle her daughter unless she gives consent has sparked a fierce parenting debate.

An Australian mother has revealed she doesn’t let anyone kiss or cuddle her daughter unless she gives consent.

Brittany Baxter, a body image coach, has taken to TikTok to explain how she’s teaching her toddler about consent – stating everyone has to ask the young girl’s permission before physically touching her, including her grandparents.

Her views appear to have touched a nerve, opening a conversation about between those who agree and the people who don’t, in her now viral video.

“As a parent I practise consent with my daughter and something’s really been bothering me, so I thought why not take it to TikTok so we can talk about it,” Brittany began.

“Can we please start normalising the fact that kids do not have to kiss and hug adults.

“My daughter’s almost two years old and I’ve been in the process of teaching her consent basically since the day that she’s been born, and I find it really f***ing unhelpful when the adults in her life are like ‘What?! We have to ask for a kiss and a hug?’ – even though I’ve explained why multiple times.”

RELATED: Mum asks toddler before changing nappy to teach consent

Aussie mum Brittany Baxter has spoken out about why she refuses to let family touch her daughter unless she gives consent. Picture: TikTok/brittanybaxter_x

Brittany continued by saying when her daughter says “no”, many adults express that their feelings have been hurt – and “proceed to overstep her body boundaries anyway”.

“My daughter and her body do not exist to make anyone feel more comfortable and to make anyone feel more loved. It is not her fault and it’s not my fault that the older generation haven’t taken the time throughout their entire lives to learn how to regulate their emotions so consent doesn’t continue to be overlooked,” she said.

The mother finished by stating: “No one’s feelings are ever going to be more important than my daughter’s right to her own body,” and called on grandparents to “do better”.

Brittany’s video has been viewed almost 400,000 times since it was shared on Wednesday, sparking divide over her parenting opinion.

Many praised the Australian mum, who currently lives in Germany, saying it was a “great lesson” to be teaching her child.

“Fifty-year-old, proud uncle here. I learned early to ask, ‘Would you like a hug, high five?’ It’s so important,” one wrote.

“I ask permission from my daughter for a kiss,” one mum said. “If she doesn’t want one that’s her choice. I don’t feel any less loved when she says no.”

“Fully support and did the same with my kids,” one dad wrote. “I would ask before hugging or kidding my kids and didn’t get mad at a no.”

Others said they didn’t understand why the rule included family members, stating it could affect her relationship with her grandparents down the line.

“Strangers, sure that’s a given … but your mum wanting to hug your daughter, her granddaughter, that’s messed up,” one claimed.

“Wow, what kid wouldn’t want to hug their grandparents?” another asked.

“Are you kidding? Other adults yes, but grandparents?” someone else stated.

Her video has sparked a big parenting conversation online. Picture: TikTok/brittanybaxter_x

There were also some who thought it was “ridiculous”, arguing society is becoming a “woke minefield”.

“I encourage my 21-month-old to bond (emotional and physical warmth) with my parents and she is so connected to them. I don’t understand your anger,” one parent said.

“Heaven forbid they [grandparents] spoil their grandkids too. Woke cancel culture is making the most wholesome traditions a minefield,” another claimed.

While another wrote: “My grandparents hugged and kissed me as they pleased and I have no issues telling someone to f off if I don’t want them to. This is just odd to me.”

The overwhelming majority supported the lesson, pointing out children who are sexually abused more often than not know their abuser, so it was an important point to teach young.

“This is great to teach children so they know it’s completely unacceptable,” one woman said.

“Emotional blackmail to get physical contact is never OK. Teach them young to have a voice and hope that they will be heard as they grow,” another agreed.

Brittany has gone on to post several more videos responding to comments and defending any backlash, stating simply: “Consent isn’t a parenting style.”

Continue the conversation @RebekahScanlan | [e-mail]