‘I’m the person most people are going to hate’: Why mum felt sorry for Bondi stabber Joel Cauchi
A Sydney mum had a deeply personal reaction to watching the Bondi stabbing footage. Now she has expressed her feelings about the killer.
A Sydney mother has called on Australia’s policymakers to have some “understanding” when it comes to the Bondi stabbing, saying the killer should be treated as a “troubled soul” who was suffering from complex issues.
Vanessa Kenny has a 17-year-old son who has been diagnosed with anxiety, autism, Tourettes, and a mood disorder and said she had “visions of her own son” while watching footage of 40-year-old Joel Cauchi at Westfield Bondi on April 13.
In an open letter to Australia’s mental health decision-makers, Ms Kenny explained how her son’s mental health issues have turned her home into a “war zone” for the past decade.
“I’m going to be the person that most people are going to hate,” she wrote. “I’m going to be the person that is going to call out all the things that came to my mind when I saw the tragedy that unfolded in Westfield Bondi Junction.”
She began by saying the incident was an “utter tragedy that so many people had their lives changed forever”.
She then described her own complex reaction to what she was seeing.
“Seeing this tragedy unfold across all media platforms, the first thing that came to my mind is that I felt sorry for Cauchi. I felt sorry for Cauchi’s parents. I felt deep pain for the troubled soul behind the chaos,” she said.
“For me it was a familiar narrative, one akin to the nightmare that this could be our son one day. One that cuts deep into my heart. One that no parent should ever have to think or feel, mixed with guilt that the thought had ever crossed your mind.
“Like Cauchi’s family we’ve hidden sharp objects, transforming our household into a battleground where safety is a fleeting illusion.”
In the aftermath of the Bondi tragedy – in which six people lost their lives – Cauchi’s parents told reporters how their son was diagnosed with schizophrenia when he was 17 years old.
Ms Kenny said her initial reaction to the tragedy has been “weighing heavily” on her mind ever since.
“Should I have thought about the people he killed, wounded both physically and mentally? Yes. A resounding YES, my heart breaks for everybody who was affected, both directly and indirectly by this tragic event,” she said.
“However, without even seeing the footage or knowing the background of Cauchi I could tell he was a troubled soul who was suffering with his mental health. He was a person, a human being, somebody’s son, possibly brother, father, or best friend.
“Visions of my own child played in my mind like a horror movie. You see I, like many others, have been fighting a health care system that is not only inadequate, but also set up for failure.”
Cauchi’s parents called Queensland Police after recognising their son on the television as the Bondi attacker.
Andrew Cauchi said he and his wife had tried for many years to help their son manage his schizophrenia, even after he was taken off his medication.
“I’m just devastated, I love my son. I made myself a servant to my son when I found out he had a mental illness. I became his servant because I loved that boy,” Mr Cauchi told reporters in the days after the tragedy.
“He’s my son and I’m loving a monster; to you he’s a monster but to me he was a very sick boy.”
Ms Kenny said the tragedy was now an opportunity to re-evaluate Australia’s mental health system.
“The health system, their executives and our own ministers like to say that he ‘fell through the cracks’,” the Sydney mother said. “This is not true. This is a system that is designed to fail, designed to push somebody onto another public service so that they do not have to address the issues at hand.”
Chris Gambian, the executive director of the grassroots group Australians for Mental Health who published Ms Kenny’s open letter, said change was necessary.
“Australia’s mental health crisis demands a crisis response,” he said.
“Vanessa Kenny is sharing a story Australia needs to hear. Mental health needs to be an urgent national priority, up there with the economy and national security. Right now we are letting Australians like Vanessa and her family down.”
Security guard farewelled
This comes as Prime Minister Anthony Albanese called a security guard murdered during the Bondi Westfield massacre a “national hero” during the man’s heartfelt funeral.
Faraz Tahir was murdered alongside five others by Cauchi during his bloody rampage through the centre on April 13.
Family and friends joined by the Ahmadiyya community at the Baitul Huda Mosque in Marsden Park on Friday to honour Mr Tahir.
Addressing the large crowd, Mr Albanese welcomed Mr Tahir’s family to Australia and told them the nation grieved with them.
“We grieve the long and happy life Faraz should have had the chance to make here in Australia,” he said.
“His life here was defined by giving back. Every tribute touched on the sense of obligation he felt.
“Faraz died a national hero, and he will be remembered as a hero in the history of these times”.
NSW Premier Chris Minns described Mr Tahir as someone who “ran towards danger”.
“He was someone who, in his final moments, gave his life in defence of others. People who he had never met,” he said.
“It took great bravery to move across the world, and it took optimism to plan a life her in Australia.
“In the final analysis, in the end, he was a good man. A kind hearted man. He was a hero”.
Mr Tahir was farewelled with a funeral prayer in which the large crowd recounted “Allahu Akbar”, or God is great, three times.
The 30-year-old’s coffin was then loaded into the hearse in view of his three brothers and survivor Mohammed Taha.
He will be transported to nearby Riverstone cemetery for burial, thousands of miles away from his native Pakistan.
Mr Tahir fled persecution in his native Punjab region, first to Sri Lanka and then through the UN refugee agency to Australia.
Ahmadiyya Muslim Community Australia National President Inamul Haq Kauser said Mr Tahir had sought “safe haven”.
“His (Mr Tahir’s) sacrifice has been recognised by all Australians, although he was a stranger in this country,” he said.
“He was a very brave person, even from childhood. When he saw people were panicked, he rushed to help them.”
Mr Kauser said a blood donation program had been set up in Mr Tahir’s honour and would become a staple of the mosque.
“Faraz died fulfilling his pledge and sacrificed his life by protecting the lives of others and serving his country,” he said.
“He gave his blood to save others and we will continue doing so by donating blood to save others’ lives.”
Mr Tahir arrived in Australia only about a year ago, having emigrated from Sri Lanka via the UN refugee agency.
It is understood he fled persecution in his native Pakistan where the Ahmadiyya faith is heavily suppressed.
The 30-year-old’s family arrived in Australia on Wednesday, the day he would have turned 31-years-old
“Faraz will be dearly missed by whole family and community,” his brother, Muzafar Tahir, said on Wednesday.
“Today is his 31st birthday and the family have seen his body for first time.
“We would like to thank the Australian public for showing love and compassion to a stranger who became a hero.”
— with NCA NewsWire
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